Partners Cat is Mental

gettingready

Horizon81 wrote: »

Thanks, that's a bit kinder than saying it's me or the cat! (Although she is free to choose at any time). I think letting it out is worth a try and I will of course be keeping my fingers crossed for one of the eventualities you mention.

How absolutely awful of you.

What will you do, "forget" to let the poor cat back into the house now and again and hope for the worst to happen to him.

Why don't you let your G/F read this thread?

Croc_Mad

How do you know the cat wasn't abused by her previous partner? She's not going to have been watching 100% of the time. Poor cat thinks it's groundhog day. If you chased him, it's bound to be stand-offish to defend itself. Fight or flight response.

You refering to the cat as "it" doesn't fill me with hope. You've done well for asking for advice, that's something you should be praised for but it does sound to me like you've made your mind up for her to rehome or PTS. Try a different vet, a good one. Ask your friends to recommend. A spray bottle will help, put about 1/10 with white vinegar. They hate it and it keeps the fleas away.

My dog nipped my boyfriend and he still agreed to go out with me, not all men are the same. A year on and he and the dog are best mates, I'm the one getting ignored!

podperson

Horizon81 wrote: »

Very helpful post, thanks. It's bitten my foot but was more of a nip than the deep bite it did to her. I do find you particular quote above a bit strange. So you have a pet that covers you in scratches and bruises that you love unconditionally.

If a man were doing this to you, you'd be speaking to a domestic violence co-ordinator, yet because it's a cat who's nice most of the time (again like an abusive partner) it's somehow tolerable.

We have a strange attitude to animals in this country!

When you have these kids that you seem to be wanting so badly will you stop loving them unconditionally if they bite/scratch/kick/bruise you - and trust me they will do at some point!

I find it really sad that you seem to think your poor girlfriend has to choose between her pet and 'family life'. One of the things that made me sure that my OH was the one I was meant to be with is that he loves my no doubt dysfunctional cat as well and even when she's driven him crazy would never make me give her up.

zzzLazyDaisy

Croc_Mad wrote: »

A spray bottle will help, put about 1/10 with white vinegar.

Don't do this! It is fine as a flea treatment where caution is used about where it is applied, but indiscriminate spraying to warn the cat off means there is a serious risk of vinegar water getting in the cats eyes and it will sting like mad. That is just cruel.

Horizon81

Croc_Mad wrote: »

How do you know the cat wasn't abused by her previous partner? She's not going to have been watching 100% of the time.

Good point and one which I already raised with her. She said cat had been like it from birth so did not think last partner had tortured it/wound it up.

And the people comparing it to an angry child - grow up. It's not the same at all and we all know it. If a child kills another child, the child goes to juvenile home/borstal. If a dog kills a child it gets put down. It's the same sort of ethical code.

Croc_Mad

I would never spray my pets in the face.

I only need to reach for the bottle now if they are misbehaving and they stop what they are doing - power of suggestion. I've had about 20 cats in my life plus 4 fosters and only ever met one I'd say was really "evil." Some kids had tried to kill him by throwing rocks and stones. He was really messed up and attacked me a few times but given his past I'm not surprised.

How recently was he neutered?

gettingready

double post sorry

gettingready

Horizon81 wrote: »

If a child kills another child, the child goes to juvenile home/borstal. If a dog kills a child it gets put down. It's the same sort of ethical code.

apart from the fact that the cat has not killed anyone and is unlikely to do that

Horizon81

gettingready wrote: »

apart from the fact that the cat has not killed anyone and is unlikely to do that

It's an analogy. Look it up. What I'm saying is you can't treat animals in exactly the same way you treat humans. Do you think cos I'm happy to PTS a cat I somehow couldn't cope with an angry child? There's no correlation.

gettingready

No need for a patronising tone, I know very well what "analogy" is. And yours was completely wrong in the situation.

Of course one can not treat animals the same way as humans. Animals do not understand what humans would so one has to be patient and caring towards little creatures.

Do you think cos I'm happy to PTS a cat I somehow couldn't cope with an angry child? There's no correlation.

Really? Now you look it up - cruelty to animals is very much linked with cruelty towards people too.