Partners Cat is Mental

his_missus

My cat has been overgrooming and pulling his hair out and my vet has just recommended a feliway plug-in which will hopefully calm this behaviour. It may work for your partner's cat's aggression.

Another thought, have you considered visiting a different vet? People often get second opinions from a different doctor if they don't like what the first one diagnosed. I find one of the vets at the surgery I go to quite a hard man and he refuses to give animals painkillers except in extreme cases whereas the other vet is much more caring and has prescribed mild painkillers when my cat has been injured.

Celli

You might be surprised, a rescue may well take him on and rehabilitate, if your partners willing, it's worth phoning to ask.
Most areas will have a good few rescues, so try as many as you can, they may even be able to give advise on a behaviourist.

valk_scot

Man v Cat.

Anyone taking bets on who is going to win here? Because it's not going to be the man, trust me. Any minute now she's going to spot that you hate the cat and are stressing and scaring it by being in its territory, chasing it and acting aggressively towards it. Cornered animals fight back, remember, it now thinks you're out to kill it and it's not wrong here, is it? No wonder it's being aggressive towards you.

Now if you'd just brought it round a tin of tuna and some cat toys you'd be quids in, with both cat and girlfriend. Now? You're on the way out, chum. No-one kills their cat of four years just because a new boyfriend doesn't like it and is mean to it.

kwmlondon

Get another cat, let them fight it out.

trevor_john

This poor cat is obviously unhappy with something in his environment. He's not evil....no animal is evil unlike some humans.

I think it's awful for you to ask people on here how you can persuade your girlfriend to kill her cat and also say that you're going to work to get the cat "dispatched".

You certainly do not sound like an animal lover to me.

I shouldn't think the cat likes you much anyway. What did you think you were going to achieve by chasing after it when it bit your girlfriend? It's not a child, it can't be grounded or smacked or have it's pocket money withheld. If you are hell bent on getting rid of it, there are centres who actually keep cats that are difficult to rehome. You just have to make the effort to find them.

I don't know where you live but there is a rescue centre in Norfolk called Venture farm. They also have a website. Google it. I recently took a very shy stray cat there and they are going to keep her as one of their resident cats as she's too nervous to be rehomed.

I'm sure there must be centres like this around the UK.

I do hope your girlfriend is not swayed by your "opinions".

Horizon81

valk_scot wrote: »

Man v Cat.

Anyone taking bets on who is going to win here? Because it's not going to be the man, trust me. Any minute now she's going to spot that you hate the cat and are stressing and scaring it by being in its territory, chasing it and acting aggressively towards it. Cornered animals fight back, remember, it now thinks you're out to kill it and it's not wrong here, is it? No wonder it's being aggressive towards you.

Now if you'd just brought it round a tin of tuna and some cat toys you'd be quids in, with both cat and girlfriend. Now? You're on the way out, chum. No-one kills their cat of four years just because a new boyfriend doesn't like it and is mean to it.

Hilarious. Who says I'm chasing it. It's like Chinese whispers on here. I said the cat ran upstairs and I ran up after it. She says every time in 4 years that it's bitten her it has run away and she has just left it be. Clearly this is a formula that is not working. So this time I thought I'd follow it upstairs. And there it was hissing away with the angriest face I've ever seen on a cat.

She agrees something must be done and things cannot continue as they are. I'm being pragmatic. It's a lonely woman who perpetually chooses her dysfunctional cat over a family life.

And humans can be evil but not animals? I'd have to disagree.

kleapatra

This could be my cat you are describing and if any bloke tried to get me to put mine to sleep, I would be tempted to put him to sleep permanantly! My vet says its very common for cats to have fits of aggression and to take them out on the person they love most. I am covered in scratches and bruises. Mine is also a house cat (and again, the vet says it is not connected) and a complete softy most of the time and he is definately a lap cat. He's been through some household changes in the last few months and that has defintely made him a lot worse than he was previously. I tried Feliway for a few months but it didn't make any obvious difference so I took him to see the vet a few weeks ago. She prescribed medication called Zykene that he has to take everyday for 2 months. So far it does seem to have made an improvement and its derived from cows milk apparently which is far more preferable than drugging him with something like tamazopan!

Maybe you get her to take the cat to the vet again to see if they can get something similar?
Incidentally, my cat would never lay a paw on anyone else, especially a child/baby, its just me he takes it out on which sounds the same as the OP's girlfriends cat.

valk_scot

My most constructive suggestion is to allow it out. This might not calm it down but hey, it will be out the house for some of the time, which both the cat and you might appreciate. Also it might take the opportunity to find itself a new home away from you. Or it might get run over which I'm sure you'd be pleased about, though the gf might blame you for it.

Horizon81

kleapatra wrote: »

My vet says its very common for cats to have fits of aggression and to take them out on the person they love most. I am covered in scratches and bruises.

Very helpful post, thanks. It's bitten my foot but was more of a nip than the deep bite it did to her. I do find you particular quote above a bit strange. So you have a pet that covers you in scratches and bruises that you love unconditionally.

If a man were doing this to you, you'd be speaking to a domestic violence co-ordinator, yet because it's a cat who's nice most of the time (again like an abusive partner) it's somehow tolerable.

We have a strange attitude to animals in this country!

Horizon81

valk_scot wrote: »

My most constructive suggestion is to allow it out. This might not calm it down but hey, it will be out the house for some of the time, which both the cat and you might appreciate. Also it might take the opportunity to find itself a new home away from you. Or it might get run over which I'm sure you'd be pleased about, though the gf might blame you for it.

Thanks, that's a bit kinder than saying it's me or the cat! (Although she is free to choose at any time). I think letting it out is worth a try and I will of course be keeping my fingers crossed for one of the eventualities you mention.