Council would rather I put 2 children in to care!!

Spendless

How big is the box room your daughter is in? Is there scope for putting her little brothers in there with her for a while anyway. That would leave the 3 older boys without the tots in their room. I was going to make the suggestion of a summer house with electricity as the solution to where to do homework. We have one for husband as his 'office' so he can work from home and it works well. Is the move to a lower paid job for your husband likely to be long term?

kj*daisy

Have a look to see if there are other larger houses on your estate to exchange with. You really are unlikely to get an extension from housing as they will have bigger houses somewhere. Tbh I would be pushing the social services department to pay for the extra room, its their budget you are saving for them by having the boys, they should pay. Housing can probably fulfil their duty and give you a bigger house without having to build, so social care could pay.

duchy

geoffky wrote: »

Councils do and will pay for extensions at private houses as they payed over 30k for my brother to have one as his lad is disabled and they built a wet room and bedroom extension...
Why should they not in a council house?

Councils build extensions to provide for need.
The OP's need is for an extra bedroom -which can be more cheaply met by moving them to a bigger property than a £30K extension.

Your nephew's needs were entirely different.
The OP's perceived need to stay in her house for sentimental reasons isn't a good enough reason in the eyes of the council.

nearlysorted

ab.da54 wrote: »

Childcare element of tax credits? Add on child benefit for four children and I would imagine the two come to a fair amount.

I have no issue by the way, with regards your benefits, just picked up on your comment about you, as a family, claiming no benefits.

Nothing to do with you personally but I wonder why people do that - sort of distancing themselves from benefit claimants, despite also benefitting from handouts. That is a whole other thread though, so apologise for taking this one off track when more pressing needs are your living arrangements.

Could you move into the larger bedroom with daughter and partition that off. Use large shelves above head height to store things.

You could then have a set of bunk beds in the smaller rooms for the boys. Three boys in one, two in the other and looking at clever storage ideas.

Something to consider is that the council may require you to move, due to overcrowding, especially when the other son lives with you.

We are now getting tax credits, before it was child benefit.
I have always felt the need to defend myself with regards to choosing to have 4 children, I have no problem with people claiming benefits, if they are benefitting who they are supposed to be, as in dh ex would send her kid(s) to their dad's sister and older one to our house to get some dinner because she has no food at home but still has money for booze, fags and designer trackies! Again, that is another thread.


The rooms in our house are nowhere near big enough to put partition walls etc... And I don't think it would be fair on dd to share with us, when she has had her own room all her life.

nearlysorted

kj*daisy wrote: »

Have a look to see if there are other larger houses on your estate to exchange with. You really are unlikely to get an extension from housing as they will have bigger houses somewhere. Tbh I would be pushing the social services department to pay for the extra room, its their budget you are saving for them by having the boys, they should pay. Housing can probably fulfil their duty and give you a bigger house without having to build, so social care could pay.

On our estate, they are all standard 3bedroom except for the properties the council have already extended.
I will be speaking to child services again tomorrow.

Again, I am thanking you all for your replies, it has given me plenty of food for thought, and I am sure one way or another it will work out, we are a family and we will cope:money:

coolcait

So, you and your OH have a combined family of six children.

All six children are now living with you, in a three bedroomed house. Or, as we say in my Scottish part of the world, a four apartment.

It's manageable. You have had plenty of tips on how to manage it.

If you can't make those tips work, or don't want to make them work, you have the option of moving. It is an option.

If you find that your reasons for not moving outweigh the reasons for moving, then you need to manage the space you have now.

Your husband has chosen to father five children. You have chosen to bear four. Between you, you now have the six children you need to house.

Stop lamenting the fact that your husband can't outhouse two of his children elsewhere. Stop griping about the fact that the Council won't prioritise your family's housing preferences above everything else on their list of things to do.

The two of you, plus the six children you have fathered and/or borne, are all living in a house which has a deep sentimental attachment for you.

You have to make thing work as they stand - or move. You've had tips on how to do both.

I'm sure you'll get even more tips once you've decided which option you're going to go for.

KxMx

nearlysorted wrote: »

The rooms in our house are nowhere near big enough to put partition walls etc... And I don't think it would be fair on dd to share with us, when she has had her own room all her life.

Needs must hun and life isn't always fair, I had my own room until the age of 8, shared with my brother for two years, then with my mum for three, didn't do me any harm!

Do you have space in the outside hall to move out things like wardrobes/chest of drawers to create more room for kids to go inside?

Savvy_Sue

ab.da54 wrote: »

Something to consider is that the council may require you to move, due to overcrowding, especially when the other son lives with you.

I don't think councils can require families to move if they're overcrowded, especially not from a secure tenancy.

What they can do is decline to offer a house in which this family would be considered to be overcrowded.

Is the whole of downstairs open plan? You say

We have a kitchen through front room and no dining room

- is there any scope for rearrangement there?

FWIW, although our boys had their own bedrooms they never used the desks we'd so thoughtfully provided for them for homework. They kept their computers on them (in the days before they had laptops), but two of them worked from their beds, using laptrays - their choice - and the youngest always brought his work down and did it on the dining table. Also there will be opportunities for them to do homework at school if it's a struggle at home. And you say there's family very close by, is there scope for doing homework there?

I can see that the space for play could be an issue, and the 'getting on top of each other', but this is how life is, teaching them to make the best of it is always worth doing ...

geoffky wrote: »

Councils do and will pay for extensions at private houses as they payed over 30k for my brother to have one as his lad is disabled and they built a wet room and bedroom extension...
Why should they not in a council house?

This sounds like something funded by a Disabled Facilities Grant, not the same budget at all.

MrsE_2

ab.da54 wrote: »

Childcare element of tax credits? Add on child benefit for four children and I would imagine the two come to a fair amount.

I have no issue by the way, with regards your benefits, just picked up on your comment about you, as a family, claiming no benefits.

Nothing to do with you personally but I wonder why people do that - sort of distancing themselves from benefit claimants, despite also benefitting from handouts. That is a whole other thread though, so apologise for taking this one off track when more pressing needs are your living arrangements.

Could you move into the larger bedroom with daughter and partition that off. Use large shelves above head height to store things.

You could then have a set of bunk beds in the smaller rooms for the boys. Three boys in one, two in the other and looking at clever storage ideas.

Something to consider is that the council may require you to move, due to overcrowding, especially when the other son lives with you.

Why is it automatically assumed that everyone with children gets tax credits?
My DD & DSIL aren't highly paid, but they are not entitled to child or any other tax credits, nor any type of subsidised child care either (except the vouchers they purchase from their salary through their employer).

seven-day-weekend

Am I right in thinking that there are six children here (one of the OP's, two of her husband's and three of their own) and that five of them are boys? And that it is a three bedroomed house?

If it is the typical house with a box room, how about this - girl in box room on her own. Three boys in largest bedroom using bunk beds and a single bed. Parents can have a wardrobe in here too, or on the hall or landing if there is room. Two boys in second bedroom. (either the two eldest, or two youngest, whichever is the most workable combination). Parents on sofa bed in lounge/dining room. Workable, and it won't be for ever.

Meanwhile, bid for a bigger house and then there will be more space.

Don't expect the Council to fund an extension. I personally don't see why they should. People in houses that are privately rented or bought have to either make do with the space they have, move, or fund an extension themselves.

(Edited to add: Due to circumstances, we have used a sofa bed in the sitting room recently, for six months, when we were sharing our house with our son, his partner and a lodger. We used a clothes rail on casters for our clothes, with boxes for smaller items, and just wheeled it from one room to another when necessary. We did this for six months until all the 'kids' moved out. I appreciate this was our choice, but it is do-able).