To holiday or not to holiday?

Funky_Bold_Ribena

I imagine they are probably in denial about the holiday because they assume it will never happen.

Tell the dad to stop being a selfish git and start making memories with his daughters - going on holiday as a family is a normal thing to do so why are you all even asking. It should be 'where are we all going on holiday' not 'do you want to?...'

sillygoose

:rotfl:I can't even imagine giving the 17 year old the choice not unless financially fully independent, but I am a control freak. Certainly the idea of leaving a 17 year old at home is scary enough.. imagine logging into Facebook whilst away and seeing the number of 'likes' for her party announcment reaching 867 :eek:

The 17 year old could stay behind, in a nice B&B for a week .. but I have 7 years before I face that one, so what do I know?

The other two would be advised of what they are required to pack or I would pack the stuff for them they hate only - beyond that its tough!

Agree try for a villa with a pool somewhere, everyone will get their own degree of space then.

Loz01

Confused why a 12 and 15 year old wouldnt want a holiday? Do you get on well with them? Even if its the UK and not some Disneyworld extravaganza, surely a break away to do fun stuff and get some treats is appealing isnt it?! What are the reasons they say for not wanting to go?

As for the 17 year old, I'd leave her home alone and Im sure she'd have to learn to cook for herself if she didnt want to go hungry.

ERICS_MUM

Personally I think your OH needs to "man up" and get a grip on your holiday plans and the girls' part in it.

Start as you mean to go on girl !

Linda xx

Ms_Chocaholic

I suggest that you get down to your local travel agent and pick up an armful of brochures

gibson123

I think the kids are scared to get their hopes up. I would start making plans for a lovely villa holiday where the lazy can laze and the enerfetic can get up and go, and once they see it start taking shape and becoming reality i guess that they will all get with the programme, only fly in the ointment maybe oldest, is there a possibility the BF can go too?

ognum

OP, I can feel you uncertainty in pushing for a holiday. You are in a difficult place, it's not easy for you to dictate to children that are not your own and you are still feeling your way with and they are not little ones they are teenagers with their own minds.

I think you need to have good conversation with your partner and discuss the options, set up several. What your options are with all three children and what they are with just the younger ones, maybe offering to take the elder child's boyfriend. Also what you could do as a pair.

talk with the children about activities or lying on a subbed and swimming! Mostly enjoy the process and try to create a team.

balletshoes

HeadAboveWater wrote: »

Understatement but yeah!

That's maybe where we've gone wrong

The girls were promised Disneyland years ago by their mum. Never materialised. Probably don't want to get their hopes up for no reason

We managed 4 days in Donegal last year with DD2 and DD3. The girls just wanted 'lazy' days whereas me and OH are 'get up and go' kinda people! Worked ok coz OHs mum came with us too. Girls wouldn't be wanting to be up at the crack of dawn every day. We said it'd be maybe half the time, and the other half take it easy just either hotel/parks/pools etc.

where are you thinking of going on a family holiday where you expect to get up at the crack of dawn half the time?

That would be my idea of not a very good holiday, and maybe your girls feel the same way (mine would).

What were the suggestions you put to them? I think you're all going to have to compromise if you want this to work.

pollypenny

I second the idea of camping in France, especially in a place with a pool.

There will be loads of teenagers in the place and your girls will soon make friends. We did it until DD was 18 and DS 15.

You don't need to go too far south. Try southern Brittany or The Vendee.

As you will be self catering it shouldn't be too expensive either.

onlyroz

I don't recall ever being given a choice about where we went on holiday when I was a child/young teen. My parents said "we're going to X this year" and I went along whether I wanted to or not (but what child wouldn't be excited about going on holiday whatever the destination?).

And along a similar line, when we were actually *on* holiday I was given little choice about what we actually did. I imagine my opinion was requested, but the final decision was theirs.

I think you need to remember who the parents are here...