Interfering in house move

Hermia

I hope you are just posting this as a vent as their comments are so OTT I can't imagine why you are taking them seriously!

AutumnMist wrote: »

Then, "If you move, you don't know what sort of neighbours you'll get". Sure we don't know who could move in here, and my extended family members don't know who could move in next door to themselves.

There are people who never make any changes in their lives incase the alternative is worse so they just stagnate. Tell them you don't want to be one of those people. Whenever I meet these sort of people I just say, "yes, I know things could go wrong and I will take responsibility if they do". There is no answer to that.

AutumnMist

fluffymuffy wrote: »

Why are you even talking to these people?

Nobody else left. Rest of family worse. So have to put up with this sort of thing as I don't want them to cut us off.

AutumnMist

Thanks for all your replies, its very nice of you all

Its worse when they say this sort of stuff to my Mum, as she's no good at sticking up for herself. Then she comes off the phone from this sort of conversation and is sad and upset.

Its different with me, I'll usually give as good as I get. Though I don't give them the telling off they sometimes deserve.

Amanda65

What relation to you and your Mum are these 'extended family'? How do they know what your neighbours are like if they don't live near you? Are you moving nearer to family ?

I'm no really sure why you haven't just told them that they will be very welcome round for a cuppa when you've moved but until then to butt out

Mojisola

AutumnMist wrote: »

Its different with me, I'll usually give as good as I get. Though I don't give them the telling off they sometimes deserve.

When people interfere like this but you don't want to upset them, use the "broken record" technique. Have a couple of stock phrases "I've already thought that through"/"I've taken advice about that" or whatever will trip off your tongue. When they start, spout your phrase and change the subject or quickly finish the call. They'll get the message eventually.

If your mother can't use the same phrases, get her to say "You'll have to talk to AutumnMist about that" and then you can use one of your phrases.

AutumnMist

Amanda65 wrote: »

What relation to you and your Mum are these 'extended family'? How do they know what your neighbours are like if they don't live near you? Are you moving nearer to family ?

I'm no really sure why you haven't just told them that they will be very welcome round for a cuppa when you've moved but until then to butt out

They know what the neighbours are like as they've been told often enough.Only recently one of the neighbours left me crying and they (family) know that.

They do know they'll be welcome

CH27

Why are you not saying what the relationship is?

Mojisola

CH27 wrote: »

Why are you not saying what the relationship is?

Does it matter which relations are causing problems?

CH27

Mojisola wrote: »

Does it matter which relations are causing problems?

I think so as it can add context to their concerns ie if it's OP's siblings.

Mojisola

CH27 wrote: »

I think so as it can add context to their concerns ie if it's OP's siblings.

Why? The house move to a bungalow is for the mother's benefit and to get away from horrible neighbours. What does it matter what any siblings think?