Child maintenance/payments to wife

snoozy

My partner is still married to his ex and we are saving up to pay for a solicitor for him to get divorced, hopefully this year. They have one child together and share the childcare responsibility 50/50 i.e. one week with us, one week with her etc.

When they were together they earned roughly the same amount but as my partner is self-employed his wages can vary quite a lot from month to month. Up until now I thought that neither had been paying anything to the other but I've just found out that he's actually been paying her around £400 a month. When I asked him why, he just said that thought men always had to pay money to the woman regardless - but I don't think he's taking into account the point that he looks after the child 50% of the time! :doh:

What we're wondering is whether he actually needs to be paying this money and what the outcome will be when they get divorced. Both he and his ex want the divorce so it won't be contested but I would imagine that she will say that he has been paying that money up until now so he should continue! I'm not trying to stop her getting money she's entitled to but I just don't see any reason why he should be giving her anything. His worry is that in the 2-3 months before they offically separated and she moved out, his business was a lot busier than normal so his wages for those months were abnormally high (whereas in other months they were very low so it all evened out). He thinks that the court will only look at his income for those months and decide that his income was much higher than hers and therefore he should pay her X amount. Also, after they separated, their daughter started school and the ex decided to go part-time so her wages will be less now (she has plenty of financial support from her parents). My partner was always against her doing this when they were together as he felt they couldn't afford it.

I guess I'm just wondering if anyone can offer any advice or suggestions about what they think will be ordered in the divorce. Like I said, I'm not trying to stop the ex getting anything she's entitled to, but I also don't see why my partner should be paying her anything just because he's the dad and she's the mum! We're struggling by as it is and the money he is paying her would really make a difference if he didn't have to pay it. We will speak to a solicitor at some point, but we just can't afford it at the moment. If it makes any difference, we're in Scotland.

Treevo

His daughter is entitled to 15% of his income, less an amount for every day out of the week she stays with him. Go to the CSA website for an accurate figure.

I suspect your OH understands that he should be providing for his daughter and unless she has two sets of everything - he has a point. You should probably edit the last bit of your post as it just comes across as you wanting your OH to cease paying for his daughter so you can splash out on luxuries for yourself.

Wilma33

Who buys her school shoes, trainers, pays for school trips, hair cuts, etc? If they also split that 50:50 then I don't think either of them should be making a payment to the other.

Kayalana99

Wilma33 wrote: »

Who buys her school shoes, trainers, pays for school trips, hair cuts, etc? If they also split that 50:50 then I don't think either of them should be making a payment to the other.

No but unfortunalty thats how the system works...just because..hes the dad!

First poster is complety correct, thiers not much more advice we can give you that won't already be covered in the CSA site as well.

summerof0763

I don't suspect your partner should be paying anything, if he is keeping and paying for everything when she is with him, if he does not buy clothes for when she is there, then he should pay a reduced amount x

snoozy

Hi Treevo, thanks for the reply but I obviously haven't explained this well enough. Their daughter does have two sets of everything and my OH has her 26 weeks of the year and her mum has her 26 weeks. I don't understand how in that case it can be fair that he has to pay additional money just because he's the dad rather than the mum.

The mum has been on 6 holidays in the last 18 months (we've been on none!), she has a flash car etc (we have an old banger badly needing repairs). I'm not wanting his cash to splash out on luxuries for myself, if anything it would be nice if he could afford to take his daughter out more or maybe even take her on holiday himself.

What I don't understand about the CSA calculator is it talks about how much the 'paying parent' has to pay, but how do you know who the paying parent is?

Wilma33

Who receives the child benefit, working tax credit, etc. (if applicable)?

snoozy

Thanks everyone else for the replies. He does pay 50/50 for everything else like clothes etc.

I just can't find anything on the CSA website that explains how they decide if anything needs to pay at all or if there are situations like this where neither parent needs to pay the other.

snoozy

Hi Wilma, I know she gets the child benefit. I don't know what else she gets but my OH definitely doesn't get anything

snoozy

Actually, I've just found this definition on the CSA website: The ‘paying parent’ is the parent the child doesn’t live with. The parent or carer the child lives with is called the ‘receiving parent’.

I may be understanding it wrongly but I would have thought that surely since she lives with them equal amounts of time then neither is the 'paying parent'

74jax

As I understand it, the parent who gets Child Benefit is classes as the main carer.