Wife not interested in £££ - OK?

Goldiegirl

As others have said, there's no harm in playing to your strengths.

I do the finances in our house, mainly because I've always worked in banking, so I'm used to figure work and admin. I don't find it a chore, I like it. However, we do discuss large purchases and make joint decisions on major expenditure.

I've made notes about all our accounts etc, so in the event of my demise,he will have somewhere to start.

My husband does things like decorating, which I'm no good at.

We are comfortable with the split of tasks

Gra76

I wrote an almost identical post some months ago as I'm in an identical situation with my wife. If I mention anything to do with money to her she starts having panic attacks and refuses to talk about it.

If I get hit by a truck tomorrow she'll be safe in the knowledge that she point blank refuses to move any of our 'savings' from our comedy 0.1% interest current account into an ISA or higher rate savings account. Any mention of it has her shouting at me to stop talking about it. I gave up talking about it with her some time ago. There's just no point as she likes to have all her eggs in one basket so to speak. She has absolutely zero financial sense refuses to see the benefits in moving money around to make the most of it.

I might just do it without telling her...

Peter999_2

My wife is not really interested in the finances either and I look after everything.

I use an application called Quicken to manage my finances and have over 10 years worth of data in it. It details every account we have, including savings, credit cards, mortgage etc.

I then have an encrypted file that has the account numbers, usernames etc, phone numbers of companies. Everything she would need if I wasn't here and she knows how to get to the encryped file and what its password is.

jennyc85

Was thinking about this today actually as it is the opposite for us, with me dealing with all the finances. Slightly different as we aren't married... we don't even have a joint account! (something i've been hassling my OH about for ages but he keeps changing the subject). Its difficult as I earn twice what he does, so I am happy to pay a bigger share, but for me it's more about the responsibility than the money itself.. Everything is in my name, he wouldn't have a clue who our utility suppliers are, or when the council tax is due... I tell him how much he owes for the bills & he gives it to me.. but it would be nice to share some of the responsibility!!

Lagoon

I do think writing things down somewhere is a good idea. OH and I have separate finances, but he deals with all of the household bills. I'm the one that's obsessed with budgeting, but I don't care much for dealing with the house!

I know that if OH wasn't around, I wouldn't have a clue how to deal with the gas, electric or water. I wouldn't know how to go about moving to a new home and getting it set up with everything it needed. I'd love for him to write me an 'Idiot's Guide to Renting a House'! I did bring it up in conversation once, but half-heartedly. There's no easy way to say "You know, if you die, I won't have a clue how to deal with the electric bill".

I know it's not exactly the same situation, but when you're in a partnership the two halves do different things. I suppose we all have aspects that our other half deals with, and that we don't quite understand.

Texfed

but what is that agreement when you sign something to agree---of course it is a will but there is another version when your relationship is in chaos and you split up and you have to get a solicitor to find what everybody is entitled to....???? i need help i know a friend is in this situation

Newly_retired

I am the one who saves, not spends, researches and moves money around to get the bext rates, has multiple accounts etc. - all in my name.
DH deals with the household bills and despite asking on numerous occasions to get these dealt with in a joint account he has not done so, so I too would be scuppered if he was killed on the M1, except that I have savings so would get it sorted eventually.
He thinks I am trying to get rid of him if I mention it - LOL.

Artytarty

It's not as simple as just making a will. Your partner needs to be able to cope without you. To dootherwise is not doing her a favour. I have known many old women who have been totally sheltered from the day to day financial decisions of running a house. When they were widowed they were just at sea and dido not even have a cheque book!

kboss2010

arbroath_lass wrote: »

You're in a partnership where jobs are "allocated" according to your strengths are you not? Why is that not an ok situation?

I.

It's not ok because, with all due respect, the family could get into a huge financial mess if the partner who sorts the finances leaves/passes away.

Everyone should know the basics as a minimum. I've seen too many housewives end up losing houses and facing financial ruin/their kids suffering because they never took an interest in their family finances and then the breadwinner suddenly died/left.

Every family runs their finances differently but I think you should sit your partner down and explain why you think they should at least let you explain what you do with the finances.

krlyr

Presumably she managed her finances fine before meeting you? I could understand having more concern if you met her and she'd run up debt or had other financial problems, but you don't mention these in your original post. She seems to have quite a sensible approach to money, not overspending, respecting the budgets, etc.

Is it a case of her not being able to manage finances, or just having no interest so leaving it up to you, as you're willing to do it? I know my OH can cook, he did it for himself when he was single, but it's not a big strength of his nor is he that interested - so I do all the cooking in the house. If I was to be hit by a truck, I'm sure he'd remember how to cook!

I think a document containing important details like account details, direct debits, etc. is a good idea regardless.