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Separated, how much should I provide?

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  • Treevo
    Treevo Posts: 1,937 Forumite
    19lottie82 wrote: »
    He lived in a bedsit. Not a one bed flat.

    Where?

    I would be more specific but I can't really spare the time to trawl through 47 pages to find the specific post. But as I've been here since page one, you'll just have to believe me. Or don't. It doesn't bother me.

    A bedsit (or studio as they're more often called) does count as a 'small flat'.
  • duchy
    duchy Posts: 19,511 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Combo Breaker Xmas Saver!
    Treevo wrote: »

    You're too poor to give your kids a decent smart phone or you don't think Jack's son should have one - that doesn't affect this situation at all.




    Is there a particular reason you're taking so much of your own anger out on me ?

    (Taken from Treevo's own post on page 1.......someone doesn't like to be disagreed with ;)

    Oh and my son is still in education but buys his own smartphone for the record
    I Would Rather Climb A Mountain Than Crawl Into A Hole

    MSE Florida wedding .....no problem
  • 19lottie82
    19lottie82 Posts: 6,031 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    edited 13 September 2013 at 2:34PM
    Treevo wrote: »
    I would be more specific but I can't really spare the time to trawl through 47 pages to find the specific post. But as I've been here since page one, you'll just have to believe me. Or don't. It doesn't bother me.

    A bedsit (or studio as they're more often called) does count as a 'small flat'.

    I've been reading it since day one as well, and I haven't seen anything about a mob of posters telling him to withdraw all support to his wife and kids.

    And I stand corrected, he was renting a room in a friends house....... so not even a small flat.
  • JackRS
    JackRS Posts: 1,063 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    Treevo wrote: »
    I would be more specific but I can't really spare the time to trawl through 47 pages to find the specific post. But as I've been here since page one, you'll just have to believe me. Or don't. It doesn't bother me.

    A bedsit (or studio as they're more often called) does count as a 'small flat'.

    I rented a bedroom from a friend, he lives on his own.
    Regards

    JackRS
  • I agree with RAS that we need to calm this down for Jack's benefit.

    Jack, I do hope you manage to get some sleep shortly, I feel for you and think you are doing an excellent job keeping up 'normal' relationships with your children. Well done so far.

    Treevo makes excellent points, which sadly continue to be missed by some readers. If a stay at home spouse has £300 haircuts every month of a 10 year marriage (which anyone would describe as extravagant), paid for out of family income, earned by the breadwinning husband, it is deemed reasonable that a departing spouse keeps paying for that until financial settlement is reached. It isn't helpful for us to point out how unreasonable this is, because it depends entirely on the circumstances and history.

    I think most of us on here, if not all of us, deem Jack to be acting reasonably given the circumstances. Most importantly he is following his solicitor's advice and obviously doing the best he can with what is being thrown at him. Personally I applaud what I see in his attitude and continue to wish him the very best on this emotional journey.
  • RAS
    RAS Posts: 35,763 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper
    JackRS

    Enjoy the cinema trip with your daughter. And sleep...........
    If you've have not made a mistake, you've made nothing
  • JackRS
    JackRS Posts: 1,063 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    RAS wrote: »
    JackRS

    Enjoy the cinema trip with your daughter. And sleep...........

    Thanks, You know what there's a huge risk of falling asleep during the film. I've got history for it, I remember falling asleep watching JFK in the cinema, mind you it wasn't the best of films.
    Regards

    JackRS
  • 19lottie82
    19lottie82 Posts: 6,031 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    Yes you're right. Apologies Jack hope you have a great weekend :)
  • kelpie35
    kelpie35 Posts: 1,789 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    JackRS wrote: »
    Thanks, You know what there's a huge risk of falling asleep during the film. I've got history for it, I remember falling asleep watching JFK in the cinema, mind you it wasn't the best of films.

    As long as you don't start snoring then you'll be alright :rotfl:
  • JackRS
    JackRS Posts: 1,063 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    19lottie82 wrote: »
    Yes you're right. Apologies Jack hope you have a great weekend :)

    No need to apologies at the end of the day this forum is peoples opinions based on their life experiences. I'm not going to do everything people suggest as I know they don't have all the facts. I've come on here to get peoples opinions so I'm going to get a variation. All those different views help me to check my own views to ensure I'm being reasonable and fair which is what I was asking for originally.

    The feedback I've had from everyone yes everyone has been helpful and informative. What I wasn't expecting was the moral support so many have given me, it really is helping me get through these dark times. I've lost interest in my hobbies and what I used to enjoy, I've lost my confidence and who I was as a person. I've wondered if there's any point to my life now as I feel so sad, and such a bad person knowing what my choices mean for the future and others.

    However you guys on here have given me the much needed support, hope and a bit of strength to carry on. I'm a long way from being the strong confident guy I once was but if I can get through this maybe I can start down the road to recovery and find a happier life.

    Thank you everyone.
    Regards

    JackRS
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