Separated, how much should I provide?

Gigervamp

bluelass wrote: »

If your eldest is 19 that is classed as an adult.
When I was 19 my dad didn't pay for my upkeep.

Keep up Bluelass, this thread was started over 3 years ago. Things have moved on a lot since then.

JackRS

spender wrote: »

Could we have an update Jack please, we all spent a long time with you until your conclusion, I would love to know how you are getting on

Thanks for your interest, I haven't posted as didn't want to clog up the forum but since you were kind enough to ask I give you a brief update.

Since Christmas I've been working on the house decorating every room and put up what seems like miles of coving! Also become very boring as my conversation topics early this year seemed to be about the trials and tribulations of mastering coving installation..... That's all behind me now, hate decorating but wanted it all done before the spring so I could concentrate outside. Lots to do outside but will do that bit by bit.

The big news is that I have met a special lady who I have fallen in love with and we are in a relationship together. I won't go into details as it's hardly a MSE topic but I'm very happy and looking forward to the future.

I still have no contact with my son but when he's ready the doors always open. I talk to my daughter each week, she still finds the situation painful and gets upset about what's happened. My ex managed to buy somewhere near her parents and my parents have been round once when they were invited. My ex collects her new car this week, she'll get another this time next year then May 2018 she returns it and the monthly maintenance payments stop. There's lots more I could say but I've already gone on too much.

Thanks for your help and support and interest. I've picked up a great deal of wisdom from my experience and learnt a great deal that could help others in similar circumstances, so please contact me if you want some advice. Key points are every situation is unique so it has to be considered so. Solicitors are paid by the fee payer, yes they are motivated to help and resolve disputes but essentially they are in my experience and others I've spoken to an expensive admin service but you don't discover that until you get to the end....

JackRS

bluelass wrote: »

If your eldest is 19 that is classed as an adult.
When I was 19 my dad didn't pay for my upkeep.

Thanks, yes you are correct however in this case he was still in full time education so the CSA rules where that I had to continue paying £650pcm until September last year. This amount then continued to be paid as part of the settlement but was no longer classed as child maintenance but spousal maintenance.

duchy

Good to see you posting Jack....... Glad to hear you are moving on with life and are finding happiness (just like we told you that you would )

Gigervamp

Oh Jack, I'm so happy for you! We knew there was someone special out there for you.

Shame about your son. My daughter's still not speaking to me, not even to acknowledge the birthday card with money I sent her. We just have to hope that eventually they'll come round.

Don't worry about cluttering up the board, so do pop back occasionally, as we love to hear from you.

Take care.

kelpie35

I am so pleased for you Jack that you have found someone who who can love you and respect your worth.

I am sure your house is immaculate and the outside will soon be the same.

You have certainly cheered me up today with your good news.

Thank you for letting us know.

Take care

spender

All I can say is thanks to responding to my request for an update, I am thrilled for you, it is amazing somebody comes along when we least expect it, wonderful news.

Solicitors in my opinion add to the stress, cost and strain of divorce.

What a difference six months make x

CruisingSaver

Jack I'm so pleased that you've met someone else and found love and happiness.


I hope that in time your son finds it within him to resume contact and re-establish his relationship with you xx

NewShadow

JackRS wrote: »

Thanks I just responded that I didn't accept the preliminary judgment of 'it's ok cause they said sorry' received the following reply:

Any update on the complaint?

JackRS

NewShadow wrote: »

Any update on the complaint?

Sorry couldn't remember if I'd previously mentioned months back but the final judgment from ombudsman was that because they'd apologised for errors they felt it was appropriate and no further action was required case closed. So basically if they make a mistake only the client has the consequences. It's clear the ombudsman is there to protect the solicitor. The only consolation is that my complaint caused the solicitor to stop acting for me so I stopped incurring further charges. It was much more efficient to deal directly with my ex's solicitor and the courts directly and obviously free of charge.

Thanks for your interest and support