Do you sometimes wish you weren't always the strong one?

BJV

100 % do not go to the interview and say anything.

Being honest I know that when I interview people first impressions do count. I could lie and say that you would get the job but you would not.
An employer wants to remember a candidate because they where amazing, capable and can see them fitting in. It is difficult to employ people the right people and it can come down to the tiniest of things.

Please, i am not trying to be heartless, just honest they do not want to remember that you where having a tough time instead they want to remember you because you where fantastic.

So hard as it may be if you can hold on just a little longer, go to the interview, be amazing, get the job and then take a few days to sort it out.

It is hard always being the go-getter, the one everyone depends on but that is you and from time to time everyone needs a bit of time out. You have had a bad time of late, you have a right to feel the way you do.

So let it out and then start you new job. Really hope it works out for you.

Lunar_Eclipse

So sorry to hear you are having a hard time. I am in a similar position in being the strong one, although I do honestly think your closest friends and family will care, if you discuss things with them.

Fingers crossed for tomorrow. Planning (going over your CV, why you want the job, why they should choose you etc) will get you in the right mindset to deal with most interviews well, particularly if the job is a good match for your skillset & experience, so don't worry that you're not functioning at 100%.

I also echo the others posters saying NOT to mention anything about an emotional week. Interviewers are looking for the superhuman (that rarely exists.) It's basically a sales interaction, with you promoting yourself, so you need to present as much of what is great about you as possible.

Generally I think people can do much better when they don't feel up to it, because they try so much harder. I have been amazed at how well my children play in competitive sports games when they're really quite ill (& ideally shouldn't be playing; hard to let a team down though.)

BlondeHeadOn

One of the best interviews I ever went to was when I was completely knackered and drained from various things going on in my life.

I was so exhausted I didn't even have the energy to feel nervous, so I went into the interview and answered their questions very succinctly and clearly, because I just wanted to get it over and done with so I could go home and have a good rest.

And guess what? It was the easiest interview I've ever had - and I got the job! Apparently I'd impressed them with my straightforward view on things and calm delivery of answers....

:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

Go to the interview and see what happens - you may find it easier than you think!

CharlieRabbit01

thanks guys, my interview is competency based so as long as i know how to do my job which i think i do i should be ok.

feeling a bit better now, had a cry over a girls shoulder at work. Which got me a fresh baked triple chocolate cookie!

just need a good end question to ask them.

victory

CharlieRabbit01 wrote: »

thanks guys, my interview is competency based so as long as i know how to do my job which i think i do i should be ok.

feeling a bit better now, had a cry over a girls shoulder at work. Which got me a fresh baked triple chocolate cookie!

just need a good end question to ask them.

How can you train me to be more efficient so I can be more productive in your work place?

marisco_2

I am a similar personality to yourself OP. If something needs doing then I get on and do it, sometimes taking on way too much and forgetting that there are people around me, who could and would be willing to take more of the strain if only I thought to ask them. Many a time in the past I have felt overwhelmed by responsibilities and not been able to see the wood for the trees as you do now. It took me a while to decide that in order to cope well I had to delegate a bit and accept other peoples help.

It sounds as if yourself and your family are going through unsettling times at the moment. A house move and threat of redundancy are big issues in life and it would be unusual for someone not to feel very stressed and anxious about them.

To add to all that you are not happy in your job but you dont say why. Could the reasons for your feelings of negativity over your current role, be knocking your confidence about going for the interview which could enable you to be promoted?

Try breaking this down a little. Problems are often easier to solve and overcome that way. If you can secure this promotion it could take alot of pressure off of you and your family financially and emotionally. So focus on this as a priority. It is not easy at all to do this when you feel low but consider all your strengths. Think about what you are good at and what positive things you could bring to this new job. Just from reading your post I can see that you are articulate, hard working, consciencious, reliable and intelligient. What other skills do your possess that could be of value to the company if they gave the role to you?

With regards to the disputes with the old agency over the housing, take as much advice from this other forum you are on and maybe contact CAB as well to gain their viewpoint and guidance on how best to proceed. There is also a board on here that covers everything to do with property and a number of posters who may be able to offer some helpful insight. This way it will be easier to handle as you will be approaching the situation from a well informed point. For the time being maybe even pass those dealings onto your other half to sort out. It doesn't need to all be down to you.

I hope very much that he will be succesful in securing new employment when he is made redundant. All the best OP.

CharlieRabbit01

My current job is good i work with good people but its not challenging enough, and offers no career progression.

I have a lot more skills to offer than are used in this job and I'm beginning to feel the strain of the "use it or lose it".

It is also likely that in October I too will be made redundant, obviously I cannot guarantee either way but based on the number of staff their salaries and the saving required there will be more redundancies than not.

The other company is the same sector as this one but i know from friends and ex colleagues that they look after their staff well and always try to promote from within.

My current employer will 9 times out of 10 employ people from an external source.

I was even denied overtime here this was given to an external person.

My OH is a gentle soul and i couldnt put this preasure on him, i've got into this state trying to aleviate his preasure.

CharlieRabbit01

OH and I work for the same company in different departments. Luckily they decided to shunt the redundancies for my department to October otherwise

I think I'd have been in a worse state if we were both being made redundant.

mcja

I sympathise completely. I lost my job 6 weeks ago(cos I was stupid and made a big error or judgement), my hubby is being made redundant but company keep changing the goal posts, and 8yo ds needs surgery on his ear drum to correct his dropping hearing.
This has meant we had to change our holiday from a week AI in Corfu to a week with the inlaws in Wales.

I am very much of the "smile and waves boys" camp, and have to say at the moment, I am really not myself but no one seems to give a !!!!. Hubby knows how I feel and doesn't ask anything, my friends have enough on their plates.

I am going up to London on Saturday to give my newborn nephew a HUGE hug cos I just need something positive at the moment.

I have no advice but please know you are not alone in feeling like you do and I will be following the advice given with interest.

I hope the interview went well.

Xx

Raksha

Just be careful what you wish for. I was the strong one for 30 years, then I got broken.