Children's party etiquette?

alleycat`

idea wrote: »

Thanks for the other side of the coin there. It's just a minefield. As I think I said before, my DD is at nursery and so I don't always see parents as we all pick up at different times so some of them I don't know, but I feel that it would be a shame to not invite a child just because I don't know the parents.

Well my DS is at nursey so we could be talking about the same thing

If it was your party i'm sorry

clearingout

I am afraid I am one of those parents who tends to leave things to the last minute - an invite will be put on my 'to do' pile and the date neatly filed in my head but when it comes down to it, I often don't make the reply to the last minute, despite good intentions. it's just who I am - but I would never turn up without having first checked with the parents as I acknowledge that non-response may have led parents to inviting others.

As a party organiser, it is very frustrating when people don't reply. In my experience, those that don't reply don't tend to turn up - it has only happened to me once that a child who didn't respond arrived on the day. I have had parents call after the fact and apologise because they didn't see the invite amongst everything else in the school bag.

mummyroysof3

We have invited 33 to daughters party and so far we have 16 that have been in touch. Bumped into one of the children's mums today who hadn't replied and that was cos they didn't get the invitation. Looks like I'm catering for 33then lol anything left gets put in a bag for next time or chocs/ sweets get eaten by me lol

pigpen

I get the invitation read it put it in my pocket and completely forget about it.. often until well after the party. I am just far too busy to remember stuff like parties.. I actually appreciate the parents nagging me about it.. I'm not rude I just forget with everything else going on in my life.

loracan1

clearingout wrote: »

I am afraid I am one of those parents who tends to leave things to the last minute - an invite will be put on my 'to do' pile

I'm sorry, I apologise to every party organiser I've done this to, but I'm also one of those parents.

jellyhead

I'm scatty too. I have a big calendar on the wall next to the kitchen table, so we look at it at mealtimes. I try to write everything in the calendar as soon as I'm given it - school dates, etc. but if I don't remember, it goes into my 'to-do' pile, which is actually more than one pile and really needs sorting.

I appreciate a quick reminder by the parent though, because mine aren't cool or popular, and a party invite is a lovely treat, whereas the cool kids probably get invited to them all, and the parents probably just get sick of it and want a weekend at home.

Person_one

pigpen wrote: »

I get the invitation read it put it in my pocket and completely forget about it.. often until well after the party. I am just far too busy to remember stuff like parties.. I actually appreciate the parents nagging me about it.. I'm not rude I just forget with everything else going on in my life.

It is a bit rude.

You have to try to remember, not just decide you're going to forget and its ok! You must remember loads of other stuff every day. I bet you have a family calendar or diary. You could have replied to the invite and put it in there in the time you spend posting on MSE.

I understand that people aren't perfect and things get forgotten, but deciding in advance that you're not even going to try to be polite and considerate doesn't really sit well with me.

loracan1

Oh...and I've never quite forgiven myself for turning up to a party as it was finishing...I'd replied to that one and convinced myself it started at 4.

idea

pigpen wrote: »

I get the invitation read it put it in my pocket and completely forget about it.. often until well after the party. I am just far too busy to remember stuff like parties.. I actually appreciate the parents nagging me about it.. I'm not rude I just forget with everything else going on in my life.

But we're all busy in one way or another are we not? Perhaps we should all be inducted as to which parents within nurseries/schools are too busy to respond so that we need not waste our own time time inviting those children in the first place!!!!

skintchick

Agutka wrote: »

I have no manners when it comes to that sort of thing, so I have told all my friends that if I don't reply it's a yes! If I can't make it I will call you with an excuse.
I found an invite in ds bag for a party that afternoon. I, or he, had no idea who the kid was so I did not phone!

I'm not rude on purpose, just too busy thinking about chocolate I guess

Deliberately not replying sound rude on purpose to me.

My answer to this issue is relentlessly chasing people, holding parties at home, and not doing party bags. And a no reply won't get another invitation.