In laws - how close is too close?

YoungBusinessman

Well i am about half a mile from in laws(not ideal to walk it though) and it can be handy....although it is a bit too close for my liking!

elsien

Put it this way, when my mother started looking at houses further down the street, I had to threaten to disown her before she got the message......

On a more serious note, it depends on what you, OH and MIL think is reasonable. And whether you all agree. My mother took to letting herself into the house whenever she was passing which I had to have strong words about.

PenguinOfDeath

My 'in-laws' live in Spain, that's a bit too close for me sometimes!

DRP

entirely depends on your relationship (obviously).

i live about 6 miles from my inlaws, across the city. I wish were closer sometimes as it is quite inconvenient and will be even more so when the grandparents take on some childcare duties later this year,,,

david29dpo

Handy for child care but to close? cake and eat it springs to mind.

moneyistooshorttomention

Never mind mother living very close and just letting themselves in when passing...mine lives a few miles away and I had to have very strong words (and more than once) about her tendency to let herself in when in the vicinity. I'm still not sure the message has 100% got through and it's only her increasing ill health (causing her not to want to "travel" very far at all) that means I feel pretty safe from her doing so these days.

Some relatives just don't - and never will - see you as a person in your own right and with your own life to lead. Others are more reasonable...

arbrighton

We spent a year living about 5 min drive/ walkable distance from my parents, in the next village where the shops/ church/ library were.
I think OH thought that was a bit close for comfort as they did tend to drop in with little to no announcement, but I wasn't working then and the company was welcome.
No little ones though.
We're now about half an hour drive away, which requires a bit of arrangment but I go to them a lot without him. THey do help us with the large volume of things that need doing in the garden etc though

msgnomey

My in laws live next door and it works very well, I cook meals for them and my OH pops round to do jobs. My parents live over 100 miles away and I wish they lived closer mind you, NOT on the other isde of us

as they all get older and frailer it's comforting to be close enough to help out when needed

Davesnave

When we started looking for a house in a certain part of the country, my MiL commented, "Well if you go there, we will never come and visit!"

Unfortunately, we bought somewhere else.

motherofstudents

Obviously depends on how you all get on together. We live a five minute walk from son and girlfriend (I'm not legally a mother in law so his girlfriend calls me in law mummy) It works out fine. We have only popped round unannounced a couple of times as they told us that's what they wanted. I find it hard to do that and I'm one for giving them their own space.
Girlfriend's mum however is prone to call round late at night and after a few glasses of wine, try to stay the night. So of course everyone's different. You have to imagine what it would be like and whether it would suit you.