Debt, depression and gambling.

michael1983l

bounce08 wrote: »

I've got a £30 crappy Samsung. I've sold everything I can! A relative is going to send me some money next week, I'm working a night shift tonight and tommorow so will be able to write off a couple of days sleeping during the day.

I'm going to self exclude from bet365 tonight (the only site I use).

Can you ask them to buy you vouchers for a supermarket instead. Its only I often borrowed money like this and ended up gambling it away again and being right back in the same position.

merlot123

Use the £20 you have to buy food, forget the gym. If you are really stuck, then sell some of the playstation games to cash converter or whatever you have in your area.

kittiej

good idea Michael, shopping vouchers to remove any temptation

Takeaway_Addict

kittiej wrote: »

good idea Michael, shopping vouchers to remove any temptation

A better idea is the family friend or another one goes and buys the food for the OP to start with

kittiej

yes that too is an option if OP says what he wants due to his diet.

I did wonder if you can shop online and have the order sent to another address?

merlot123

kittiej wrote: »

I did wonder if you can shop online and have the order sent to another address?

Tesco certainly offer this, as I get my groceries delivered to the holiday cottage I rent each year.

michael1983l

kittiej wrote: »

yes that too is an option if OP says what he wants due to his diet.

I did wonder if you can shop online and have the order sent to another address?

You have to remember that relationships are likely to be strained with friends and family over money anyway because this has likely been going on a long time. The family member who is lending the money is likely doing it very reluctantly and asking them to go out of their way to do something like that might be asking too much. I would say that vouchers are a happy medium, but I think the OP's friends and family should stop handing cash over alltogether.

Part of being able to gamble your basics money away is down to knowing that someone will always bail you oout. When you get used to the idea of not having anyone to bail you out, you do not gamble the basics money. I don't think it is at the stage where his friends and family have learned this yet.

kittiej

yes this is a very good point

Time_to_face_the_music

bounce08 wrote: »

I could have been debt free this year had I stuck with PayPlan. But due to my debts, they wanted around £700 a month to pay to my creditors, and that's after budgeting. I have no idea how they expect any healthy person to live off £180 a month in Central London. Fruit and veg and meat (chicken etc) is so expensive these days.

bounce08 wrote: »

I just cannot commit money to paying off debts voluntarily, espcially as high as £1300. I know it's very bad and I built this debt up, but I was 18 at the time and naive/didn't have a care in the world/lived with parents.

I work very hard, sometimes 70+ hours a week and paying PayPlan £1360+ a month as soon as I get paid is more than half my wages, gone just like that.

Your messages are full of contradictions.

Payplan: £700 a month? Or £1360+ a month? Which is it? If you haven't paid Payplan for over a year, why haven't they cancelled your DMP, have they discussed your lack of payments with you?

You need £300 a month for food for one person for your medical condition which requires a low iron and low fat diet? What medical condition is this? Haemochromatosis? There are other more effective methods of treatment than diet changes. Even if it does have these stringent requirements, you could easily halve this, preferably get it down to £100. Get free range chicken and eggs from Aldi, fish and fruit from markets etc.

So you have a public sector job at £45K pa with live in accommodation offered as a bonus and no qualifications required? Nice! Take home pay of £2200 per month for a £45K job is not correct, have you checked your tax code? The job does not allow bankruptcy? So you are very happy about the bankruptcy but you will need to give up the £45K job to go for it? What will you do instead? Where will you live?

It's easy to blame your younger self for getting into this debt but your older, and hopefully more mature, self needs to deal with this situation. Leopards may not be able to change their spots but I am sure you can change your "wiring". You are 28 years old, you could be debt free in less than 2 years, what a 30th birthday gift. You need some motivation and discipline and a debt free life with money to spend on whatever you want ... please not gambling ... is yours.

My advice would be to restart your DMP with a non-fee charging organisation. Go back to Payplan or try StepChange or Christians Against Poverty. Get help, advice, support and motivation on these forums. Watch your debt reduce monthly, check out my signature for the reality of this. Be debtfree in less than 2 years. Change your life to whatever you really want to do. Live happily ever after. You can do it.

mullery83

Can I be blunt is that allowed? Stop lying to yourself.....

You earn enough to live comfortably and pay payplan. You do not.

You are a gambler as am I. I can give you and excuse for not making an excuse its what WE do best.

You not being able to commit to the repayments is a choice, payplan are among the most reasonable people to deal with if you communicate.

I'm in debt and slowly sorting it with the same problems, I'm in North London and would happily by you a coffee and sandwich and chat face to face and offer help.

I don't even know you and I am willing to do that. There's always help but as the saying goes, you have to want it.

I totally appreciate your medical condition but, the fact you don't consider the gym a luxury, a ps3 a luxury just shows how easy we could help you.

I hope I don't offend but be honest with yourself....