Moral duty to parents

susy_2

studentphil wrote: »

It is about having a duty to your parents to keep them in a decent lifestyle in their old age.

I have a 19 yr old daughter Phil. She owes me nothing. She does not have a duty to me. It was my choice to have her and she has repaid me back many times over the years with the sheer pleasure of her company and the pride she gives me.

I do not have central heating Phil. I never have had (oh and I have Raynauds). My carpets are threadbare. My sofa's were given to me by my neighbour.

I had to give up Uni (not too many years ago) due to financial reasons. I had to give up my dreams of a better life. I will never be mortgage free and my pension is not worth talking about. I have several jobs (none of them particularly good).

Are you feeling sorry for me yet Phil???? Should I start a thread about how unfair life has been to me???

And I still do not expect my daughter to be my passport to a better life!


I could go on, but I would bore the pants off everybody else. Got the message yet Phil??

studentphil

susy wrote: »

I have a 19 yr old daughter Phil. She owes me nothing. She does not have a duty to me. It was my choice to have her and she has repaid me back many times over the years with the sheer pleasure of her company and the pride she gives me.

I do not have central heating Phil. I never have had (oh and I have Raynauds). My carpets are threadbare. My sofa's were given to me by my neighbour.

I had to give up Uni (not too many years ago) due to financial reasons. I had to give up my dreams of a better life. I will never be mortgage free and my pension is not worth talking about. I have several jobs (none of them particularly good).

Are you feeling sorry for me yet Phil???? Should I start a thread about how unfair life has been to me???

And I still do not expect my daughter to be my passport to a better life!


I could go on, but I would bore the pants off everybody else. Got the message yet Phil??

I know what you mean that I do not owe my parents anything. But I think I have a duty to help my Mum feel better and I hope that improving her home might do that.

Dee123_2

studentphil wrote: »

I know what you mean that I do not owe my parents anything. But I think I have a duty to help my Mum feel better and I hope that improving her home might do that.

In your opening post you say they "require" your money and later you say they dont have enough to live on with just pensions.

You're creating yet another melodramatic non-existant problem here.

studentphil

Dee123 wrote: »

In your opening post you say they "require" your money and later you say they dont have enough to live on with just pensions.

You're creating yet another melodramatic non-existant problem here.

They have enough to live on pensions but they are not able to save enough for things like home improvements which I am hoping to pay for.

brazilianwax

studentphil wrote: »

They have enough to live on pensions but they are not able to save enough for things like home improvements which I am hoping to pay for.

Why can't you give them say half of your savings?

You won't have to pay your loans back for ages, so why wait till you're working to buy them the things that will transform their lives?!

Dee123_2

studentphil wrote: »

They have enough to live on pensions but they are not able to save enough for things like home improvements which I am hoping to pay for.

But thats your choice, Phil. It should make you feel good that it will be a time in your life where you can help them if your finances permit. It shouldnt cause you to post as you have in the past on here and other threads about how their lives will fall apart if you cant help them and you cant move on.

You really do look at some things from very peculiar angles (and mostly negatively)

studentphil

brazilianwax wrote: »

Why can't you give them say half of your savings?

You won't have to pay your loans back for ages, so why wait till you're working to buy them the things that will transform their lives?!

If I get this job on Tuesday then I should be able to spend a grand on them straight away as my Cash flow will be vastly increase, namely, 70 pounds a week.

brazilianwax

studentphil wrote: »

If I get this job on Tuesday then I should be able to spend a grand on them straight away as my Cash flow will be vastly increase, namely, 70 pounds a week.

how does that maths work??

studentphil

Dee123 wrote: »

But thats your choice, Phil. It should make you feel good that it will be a time in your life where you can help them if your finances permit. It shouldnt cause you to post as you have in the past on here and other threads about how their lives will fall apart if you cant help them and you cant move on.

You really do look at some things from very peculiar angles (and mostly negatively)

Maybe they would get on better without me. But as far as I know they are in all but name divorced.

studentphil

brazilianwax wrote: »

how does that maths work??

It works by I can spend the money out of my current account on my parents if I know I have an income to survive on then I spend the money in my current account.