Nice people thread part 8 - worth the wait

lemonjelly

Generali wrote: »

I hadn't seen those LydiaJ but I will have done by the end of tomorrow.

I want to trust the kids but if they won't let me trust them then things will have to change.

Did you ever tell a lie to your parets? About a drink, cigarette, where you'd been, or who with?

The kids need to know and understand why trust is so precious and important. Hopefully, when they learn that, they'll appreciate that part of the relationship.

After that, they need to know what will suffice to regain that trust, and wil prove they can be trusted longer term. This miht happen in stages, a gradual re-introduction of priveliges.

I can't tell you what would be acceptable there. That's a very personal family issue to decide. My one tip would be to ask them what they think they can do to rebuild trust. Give them some ownership of reparation.

LydiaJ

silvercar wrote: »

DS2 was befriended online by a teacher at his school. Innocent we thought, until he went to prison for grooming, dodgy images....

Who would say no to a child wanting to natter to their teacher online?

PasturesNew wrote: »

I'd have found that exceedingly odd right from the start. Why on earth would any teacher want to spend all day with kids, then go home and hook up online. Well weird.

I wouldn't necessarily expect a parent to recognise it as weird if they weren't familiar with the rules as they apply to teachers, but to me it looks well dodgy from the outset. As teachers, we are trained never to make one student feel they are being singled out as "special" to the teacher. Also, we're not supposed to let students' know our private email addresses, and any emails we send/receive through work will be archived and can be viewed by management (and parents, by request) at any time, and should be written accordingly.

A teacher's relationship with students is professional and has to keep a professional distance. It's not just that we're expected to refrain from grooming them, but we're expected to be on the look-out for them developing crushes, and make absolutely sure that such things never receive any response that could be construed by the student as encouragement. My alarm bells would certainly start going off if a teacher was exchanging lots of private emails with one of my kids.

lemonjelly wrote: »

Did you ever tell a lie to your parets? About a drink, cigarette, where you'd been, or who with?

The kids need to know and understand why trust is so precious and important. Hopefully, when they learn that, they'll appreciate that part of the relationship.

After that, they need to know what will suffice to regain that trust, and wil prove they can be trusted longer term. This miht happen in stages, a gradual re-introduction of priveliges.

I can't tell you what would be acceptable there. That's a very personal family issue to decide. My one tip would be to ask them what they think they can do to rebuild trust. Give them some ownership of reparation.

Excellent post, lemonjelly. Thank you.

CKhalvashi

Hello Khalvashi,

I have been in search of someone with this name "Khalvashi" and It is my pleasure to seek for your business assistance, and I want you to consider it very important. This is an opportunity I would want us to utilize well. I am Mr.Thomas Stephen, an officer in charge of Auditing and Accounting section with (Unibank Ghana Limited), and also a Relationship Account Officer to Dr. Cardiff Khalvashi.

In 2007,One Late Dr. Cardiff Khalvashi, a citizen of your country had a fixed deposit with my bank for 60 calendar months, valued US$8,700,000.00 (Eight Million, Seven Hundred Thousand US Dollars) the maturity date for this deposit contract was this last 16th July 2012. Sadly Dr.Cardiff was among the death victims in the 12th May 2008 Earthquake disaster that occurred in the Sichuan province of China that killed thousands of people. He was in China on a business trip and that was how he met his end, I have carried out various inquiries to locate any of his client and extended relatives but this has proved unsuccessful. Since the demise of this our customer, Dr. Cardiff, who was an seasoned oil Merchant/contractor here. I have kept a close watch of the deposit records and accounts and since then no body has come to claim the said money in this a/c as next of kin.

I hereby write in regards to this effect to have you stand as the rightful beneficiary to Late Dr. Cardiff so that the funds will be claim and transferred into your foreign account before my Bank declare the total fund unserviceable or confiscated. Please you will be entitled to a percentage that will be discussed later with you and there is no risk involved, the transaction will be executed under a legitimate arrangement that will protect you from any breach of law.

I immensely request for your optimum honesty and cooperation and Let me know your mind on this, and please do treat this information as TOP SECRET. We shall go over the details once I receive your urgent response strictly through my personal email address, (xxxxx) We can as well discuss this on phone.

Anticipating your communication.

Yours sincerely,
Thomas Stephen

They're coming on Skype now :eek::eek::eek:

I'm not saying not to trust the Internet, but there's an alarming discrepancy between the number of iPads I've won, & the number of iPads I own.....

I know it's a scam, but I'm baiting him a little here. He doesn't seem to believe that we're from 'new' money background (meaning post-1990), but I'm careful not to give too much info.

CK

ETA: Most former USSR citizens are from 'new' money, as noone owned property, nor owned shares/much in savings until less than 25 years ago. I also know of noone Georgian, called Cardiff.

Nikkster

dranf1976 wrote: »

veryone needs to be inoculated

LydiaJ wrote: »

Hello dranf

Are you a real live person? If so, then welcome to the NPT :hello:

I'm not sure about a real live person. Possibly more of an attenuated spambot!

PasturesNew

lostinrates wrote: »

I did suffer an attempted kidnap but had already put on weight.

Nice.... but I think we need more details now, so we can laugh even more heartily

lostinrates

PasturesNew wrote: »

Nice.... but I think we need more details now, so we can laugh even more heartily

I think I have already told the story here in the past?

If not I am going to retain what little dignity I pretend to have.

silvercar

LydiaJ wrote: »

I wouldn't necessarily expect a parent to recognise it as weird if they weren't familiar with the rules as they apply to teachers, but to me it looks well dodgy from the outset. As teachers, we are trained never to make one student feel they are being singled out as "special" to the teacher. Also, we're not supposed to let students' know our private email addresses, and any emails we send/receive through work will be archived and can be viewed by management (and parents, by request) at any time, and should be written accordingly.

A teacher's relationship with students is professional and has to keep a professional distance. It's not just that we're expected to refrain from grooming them, but we're expected to be on the look-out for them developing crushes, and make absolutely sure that such things never receive any response that could be construed by the student as encouragement. My alarm bells would certainly start going off if a teacher was exchanging lots of private emails with one of my kids.

Now I have to defend my naivity when he was the !!!!! not me!

It was a group online chat amongst the school footie team and he was the teacher with responsibility for putting together the team and taking them training etc No private emails just group chat through MSN messenger or something similar. I guess the evil plan was to progress conversations to get to know people individually.

GDB2222

lostinrates wrote: »

I think I have already told the story here in the past?

If not I am going to retain what little dignity I pretend to have.

I do not think you need to be defensive in the slightest. You did exactly the right thing in the circumstances, so I think you were being quickwitted and ought to be applauded.

lostinrates

GDB2222 wrote: »

I do not think you need to be defensive in the slightest. You did exactly the right thing in the circumstances, so I think you were being quickwitted and ought to be applauded.

Thanks GDB... Don't worry I am not defensive.....and PN I hope knows that. .

Nikkster

PasturesNew wrote: »

If you lot could organise a whip round to give me £60k the search'd be easier

I'm afraid I can't loan you any money PN. Sadly my 3.3% interest saving account had its first birthday today, so I had to shuffle some cash around. Whilst it wasn't megabucks, it is a lot to me and certainly more than I normally move around. Just over 10k spent most of the day in cyberspace (faster payment - pah!). I was very pleased when it finally arrived at its destination. I'll be keeping my money where I can keep an eye on it (or as close as I can keep an eye one it without carrying it around in a backpack) from now!