Starve Out The Other Spouse

RAS

Sleazy wrote: »

My advice as you're so near 2 years anyway - pay for what you have to (your name's on the bill) and not a penny more until the 2 years are up. Unfortunately you've already moved out or I would have suggested staying put :cool:

Nothing to prevent him moving back in tomorrow?

BlackRaven_3

RAS wrote: »

Nothing to prevent him moving back in tomorrow?

True, but my new girlfriend might have something to say about that!! :rotfl:

dancingfairy

Why would she have any incentive to do anything? You're paying her mortgage, bills etc.
You've even paid her a settlement.
She's got it made, hasn't she.
It's ridiculous. I know you don't want to fall out, but she needs to act reasonably.
df
Edit: It's technically half your house, you've either got to cut off the money or move back in to force the issue (as far as I can tell). Why are you letting her drag this out?

pigpen

RAS wrote: »

Do it now.

I know one couple where one party died in a RTA a week before the divorce became absolute. The ex-wife got everything.

this happened when my uncle died, he had a stroke at 41 and died 2 weeks later. his gf and children got nothing and his exwife got everything despite it being her who had left him and the 4 children.. life insurance, house, car, everything.

getmore4less

Why on earth are you not living in the place and her moved on.


As others have said whe is milking you.

Move back in bring the GF with you.

BlackRaven_3

I'd be in like a shot once I can get her out! I moved out (went to my mums) as things came to a head and I decided we couldn't stay together. At the time of leaving, I didn't know I could afford the house on my own, and would have sold it. Also, would have been difficult to throw her out!

RAS

For heaven's sake start divorce proceeding on the grounds of unreasonable behaviour; you have listed enough evidence of financial abuse.

Download the paperwork off the net, fill it in and send it to her next week. If she wants want unreasonable grounds, then she can agree the transfer document.

FatVonD

BlackRaven wrote: »

True, but my new girlfriend might have something to say about that!! :rotfl:

Take her with you!

Thegirl

I would move the direct debit for the mortgage and house insurance to your personal bank account. Personally, I would pay the whole mortgage myself, just so I knew it was all being paid - still less than you are currently paying. Ensures your credit rating is in tact.

As for all of the other bills, make sure they are not in your name. Then close the joint bank account. Explain that you have split up with your wife to the bank and that all transactions need to cease immmediately. Failure to do this means she can rack up one hell of an overdraft before you know it and you are equally liable.

Speak to your solicitor urgently. The money you have already given her as a settlement could already be lost. Her solicitor is obviously going to try for more hence their advice to her not to sign.

If your wife kicks off about you not contributing to the bills in the house as she cannot afford it, the simple answer is for her to move out. At the moment she has no incentive to leave and you are VERY vunerable to her financially at the moment.

It's great that you are trying to be amicable and you have been overly generous. I suspect you are trying to act in a way you believe is fair and how you would want to be treated, which is a lovely quality. Hopefully she will act with honour and not try and screw you over. But precious few manage to get through a divorce with both parties acting in a way that they would want to be treated.

BlackRaven_3

I don't distrust her, I just think she is naive taking her Solicitor's complete advice. I KNOW she would not run up overdraft or not pay bills. Plus, leaving it coming from the joint at least I can see the payments coming out (and hopefully her increased payment going in).

I informed her at the weekend that I was going to reduce to just half mortgage/half insurance and she just accepted it with no argument. She says that against her Solicitor's advice, she is going to make an appointment at Halifax with a view to coming off the deeds and so she can look at getting a mortgage for herself for a new home.

As for her Solicitor getting more money from me, she has more to lose than I do as she has a £20K pension I have not requested to touch at all, whereas I have nothing left other than the other half of the equity in the house (less than her pension). I am actually more concerned at her Solicitors fees. Mine was a fixed rate of £425+VAT, plus the court fees. Hers is already at £900 and no court fees! We had agreed to split legal fees where possible so I am concerned her fees are spiraling by taking poor advice. Her Solicitor sent a letter asking me to confirm I would not spend the money she already had for a week. And thats the only letter received from her Solicitor!