Starve Out The Other Spouse

BlackRaven_3

Found the above term on sites basically advising not to do it. But no advice on how it should be handled.

I moved out about 18 months ago, no real fixed abode, although spending most time at my girlfriends nowadays (not the reason we split, this is a new relationship).

I am paying £900 into the joint account, and my ex is paying £625.

Bill breakdown as follows, although up until I said something she was also using the joint account for her food:

Council Tax £87.00
Gas/Electricity £83.00
Insurance £22.91
TV £80.00
Water £16.80
Halifax Mortgage £739.40
TV Insurance £6.05
Pet food/vets £100.00
TV License £12.18
TOTAL £1,147.34

Firstly, what would be reasonable to reduce my payments to, without resorting to the starving tactics.

Secondly, we have already agreed how much for me to pay her in full settlement, which she has been paid. I went to Halifax to arrange the Transfer Of Equity, gave her the paperwork. She now tells me her Solicitor has told her not to sign it until after the divorce (which I can't apply for until June - 2 years after leaving). As to take her name of will also take 2 months this seems to be dragging out, at my expense bearing in mind the above!!! Also, she has no incentive to move out whilst I am still paying bills.
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Bit of clarity.

• No kids at all.
• She already took my name off the Council Tax (against my wishes). Unsure if I have to backpay the time with my name off, or if that affects my credit rating as not "at the same address" throughout in their eyes.

Gillyx

If your name is on the mortgage I'd be assuring it was paid but I wouldn't be paying for electricity/gas, tv licence, water if I wasn't living there and would get your name taken off any of those bills in case your ex decides to stop paying them...

RAS

Asuming no kids are involved

You can divorce after one year's marriage on the grounds of unreasonable behaviour or irretrieveble breakdown.

Why are you STILL operating a joint account if you split 2 years ago? Is she claiming single persons tax rebate whilst you pay towards the CT bill? That could cause trouble for her. And why are you paying to run a house in which you no longer live???

Open a new bank account urgently. - basic will do and needs no credit check.

Get the DD details from the existing bank account and arrange to pay half the mortgage directly from your new account. Speak to the mortgage provider first.

With respect to the joint account you need to prepare and then act quickly. Find out if you can take your name off the joint account without her consent. If not you are going to have to play hardball. And do check your credit record incase you have any other old dormant accounts anywhere (stores, cards etc.)

Arrange to meet her to discuss the account.

Advise her that

1. You are taking your name off all the bills except the mortgage.
2. Either your name comes off the joint account (have the consent form) or all further transaction require BOTH signatories m(have the letter written to the bank.
3. You are pying half the mortgage direct to the provider in future.

Do this early in the day and take the form or letter to the bank by hand and insist it is actioned then amd there.

If kids are involved then do as above but pay her the relevant CSA and she picks up the tab for the mortgage.

Northern_Princess

I agree with the above. I'd have your name removed from all bills relating to the house. I'd also only be paying half the mortgage direct to the lender. We had a close friend that had to resort to this when his ex was happily living in the marital home alone (no kids) and he could barely afford to eat for paying all her bills.

chirpychick

Surely you should only be paying half of the mortgage, council tax and buildings insurance?

Bella73

chirpychick wrote: »

Surely you should only be paying half of the mortgage, council tax and buildings insurance?

If she's living there on her own she can claim single person discount for council tax so I wouldn't pay that bit, only half the mortgage and house insurance

BlackRaven_3

Bit of clarity.

• No kids at all.
• She already took my name off the Council Tax (against my wishes). Unsure if I have to backpay the time with my name off, or if that affects my credit rating as not "at the same address" throughout in their eyes.

Treevo

Pay half the mortgage and nothing else. Why are you paying more than this?

lika_86

If your total bills are £1147, why are you putting in £900 and her putting in £625 - what happens to the excess?

Also pet food/vets - £100 a month?!

I would pay half the mortgage direct to the lender (saving the other half in case - remember that you will be jointly and severably liable and don't want them coming after you and being unable to pay if she doesn't pay her half). Otherwise, the rest of the costs are being incurred by her, let her pay them (other than any costs directly linked to the mortgage ie. insurance which I would suggest you pay to ensure they are paid).

Also, you mention you have paid her money already in full settlement, what for? And why has this been paid before you're divorced and she has signed the necessary paperwork? Did you take legal advice? Also, if you've paid her a lump sum in full settlement, why are you continuing to pay bills she's incurring?!

RAS

And have you written a new will?

bryanb

Paying half the mortgage won't mean you don't have to pay the other half. Joint and several etc