Starve Out The Other Spouse

BlackRaven_3

Am paying more as I don't want to get nasty. The excess is just staying in the account, towards legal bills in the divorce for example.

I had the cash in my account (cashed in an endowment), so I just paid it her to get it out the way, to show I am willing, and to hopefully speed up the process if she needed to put a deposit down to secure a new home. We are trying to be amicable, and I realise I have already given much more than I needed to (for 18 months I have paid her food, and I actually reduced it down to £900 from what I was paying previously!).

Advice is helpful. I will probably just pay mortgage in full (to know it is paid and out the way, and insurance).

What is a reasonable time to expect her to vacate the property? Will I have to wait until after divorce/her name off the deed? Can I just serve her notice to vacate by a certain date?

BlackRaven_3

RAS wrote: »

And have you written a new will?

Haven't got a will in the first place, but Solicitor handling my divorce has already mentioned doing one.

RAS

BlackRaven wrote: »

Haven't got a will in the first place, but Solicitor handling my divorce has already mentioned doing one.

Do it now.

I know one couple where one party died in a RTA a week before the divorce became absolute. The ex-wife got everything.

RAS

BlackRaven wrote: »

The excess is just staying in the account, towards legal bills in the divorce for example.

She could spend that on a long-haul holiday tomorrow and you would have no come-back.

Or on furniture for the new house.

podperson

I assume she's taken your name off the council tax so she can claim single person discount? She can't have it both ways - either she's the sole tenant and she gets the reduced bill which she has to pay herself, or she classes you both as still tenants and there you contribute but it's to the full amount. (I'm saying tenant for the sake of clarity here as if the property is occupied then the council tax is the responsibility of the tenants and not the owner).

As far as I can see your responsibilites are the mortgage and the insurance (and I would go so far as to say buildings only there in case she's planning on leaving contents when she moves out). You've been separated at least 18 months - I have no idea why you're still contributing to her tv licence and her electric! After this length of time she needs to be supporting herself, not still expecting you to pay her bills.

You need to get her name off as soon as possible - and now you've given her the money already I'm sorry to say you have much less to bargin with! At least stop encouraging her to stay by giving her an easy ride.

lika_86

BlackRaven wrote: »

I had the cash in my account (cashed in an endowment), so I just paid it her to get it out the way, to show I am willing, and to hopefully speed up the process if she needed to put a deposit down to secure a new home.

I'm surprised your solicitor didn't advise against this to be honest. Money is generally used as leverage to encourage the other party to move quicker by withholding it until they agree to do what you want them to. She has no incentive to speed the process up as she has a lump sum and you're paying her bills.

FatVonD

How many bedrooms? Could you rent out your half to a lodger?

I agree it's worth you paying the whole mortgage just to know it's being paid (and that will still be less than the £900 you're currently paying.)

BlackRaven_3

Its 4 bedroom, but as I am getting the house back I don't want to rent out/house share it.

I think I have decided now to pay mortgage and insurance in full, which is still cheaper for her as she is effectively not paying any rent/mortgage to stay there. I have written to her to ask her reasons for not signing the Transfer Of Equity form. If this is not valid, I will serve her notice to move, or maybe ask for the going rate for rent as my tenant.

RAS

BlackRaven wrote: »

If this is not valid, I will serve her notice to move, or maybe ask for the going rate for rent as my tenant.

You cannot do either whilst she is still on the deeds.

Please see a lawyer.

[Deleted User]

Take care with the '2 year apart - no fault divorce' rule. I know personally of someone who waited because they didn't wan't to 'bring out their dirty washing' and after 2 years their wife refused to agree to a divorce so they had to go down the (very) unreasonable behaviour route anyway and be no more Mister Nice Guy.

My advice as you're so near 2 years anyway - pay for what you have to (your name's on the bill) and not a penny more until the 2 years are up. Unfortunately you've already moved out or I would have suggested staying put :cool: