Why do Police not know the Law

Sommer43

What a palava. He agreed she could live in the house, she changed the locks, Granny? If your son wants her out then she should be served with an eviction order. There certainly does appear to be some tenancy issues here. The housing board is where you should ask for help, they will know exactly how to advise you.

If you want access to your Grandson, then you will need to apply for a contact order or approach your Grandson's mother and try to work out an arrangement. If your son wants access on release, then he will need to do the same. You're making this harder for yourself by being angry and you're doing yourself no credit with having a go about her. Speak to her parents, explain you want the best solution for your Grandson all round. Come up with a plan that suits you all.

Padstow

suki1964 wrote: »

Not only that but the ex never lived with the offender in that house as a family unit, she only got to move in after the offender was locked up

According to the op, it's a work in progress, no kitchen as such installed as yet. Son said to GF to move in for a while as a stop gap , and she then goes changes the locks, and breaks all contact with op,s family

Only just seen your post suki, strange I asked the question that you'd answered.:eek:

I asked it, as I couldn't understand the appeal of staying in a house without a bathroom or kitchen. Must be difficult especially with a little one, although I suppose it keeps her at the top of the housing list.

pulliptears

I recall reading OP's original thread and feeling quite sorry for her family actually. Despite some of the resounding judgement on here:

That said,the father is no saint either.

OP's son, from memory, had made a mistake some time ago, found out his GF was pregnant and turned his life around. He's now serving his sentence for his crime but as that was committed long ago it's perfectly possible that the lad has turned his life around for the sake of his child.

The fact that OP's son is in prison really shouldn't factor into this, I'm wondering if some of the answers here would differ if OP had said her son was working away on the rigs or in Dubai etc.

The GF was never given permission to reside in the home permanently, they never lived together and the home was from memory again a renovation with no working facilities.

koalamummy

Unfortunately though society as whole views ex offenders in a less than favourable manner regardless of the changes the person may have made to their life. This too may have been what in truth has caused the ex's recent behaviour. There is still whether we like it or not a certain stigma attached to criminals and their families which never goes. We do not know what experiences this woman had when she told people that her partner and father of her child was in prison. I have never been in her position but I can imagine that there are only so many of those looks, equivalent to endless name calling she endured before she could not cope anymore. Unfortunately she would never have been able to discuss this with the OP as oddly parents of said criminal receive very different treatment. They more often than not receive pity, sympathy, and assurances that they tried their best.

pulliptears

koalamummy wrote: »

Unfortunately though society as whole views ex offenders in a less than favourable manner regardless of the changes the person may have made to their life. This too may have been what in truth has caused the ex's recent behaviour. There is still whether we like it or not a certain stigma attached to criminals and their families which never goes. We do not know what experiences this woman had when she told people that her partner and father of her child was in prison. I have never been in her position but I can imagine that there are only so many of those looks, equivalent to endless name calling she endured before she could not cope anymore. Unfortunately she would never have been able to discuss this with the OP as oddly parents of said criminal receive very different treatment. They more often than not receive pity, sympathy, and assurances that they tried their best.

From what I gathered from the old thread child was conceived after the criminality had taken place so it's not like she wasn't in possession of the full facts. She had a child with someone who had been charged with offences so to bleat about it later is a little hypocritical imo.

Yorkie1

**Patty** wrote: »

No i think the OP knows the whole story.

What she wants is the GF out of the property.

She wants the police there before hand as her son will be out on tag & any disturbance will result in him getting locked up PDQ.

The GF knows if she kicks off he'll go back inside.

Finger pointing (oh look it's her fault not mine) & manipulation of the police force at it's worst.

Actually, if a breach of the peace is anticipated it is entirely reasonable to ask the police to attend to prevent the said breach occurring.

The fact that people don't like the particular scenario presented by the OP does not take away from this.

Mojisola

From the other thread -

Now the major problem we have is that he is due day release in next few weeks..if she were to call the police when he turned up at home he runs the risk of losing all furture day release and early release on tag..Now we can only assume that is her aim

She has completely blown us out the Water with the way she has behaved, She played the dutiful G/F the child was taken to visit my Son every week. came to stay with us and we looked after the Child 3 times weekly and have always done so.Then bang she sends my Son a Dear John letter in which she advised that she was ending the relationship and getting a Flat and refuses to let him see his son. He has tried calling her she cuts the call he has wrote she ignored the letter . We as a Family have all tried contact that has been ignored.

The sentence was bad enough to deal with but we now have the added problems that she can delay his release. Also my Son runs his business from Home so if he lives elsewhere he cant earn and without earning will not be able to pay mortgage.

I would consider it essential to get back control of the house if it was my son in this position.

If he is going to start earning again, he needs access to his property. To support his son, he needs to be earning.

If she can get him taken back to jail, she could move her new man into the house and still have all the bills paid for by her ex.

jacobcrespo

Their job is to keep the peace and prevent/investigate criminal matters.

suki1964

shegirl wrote: »

I missed that!Was that on this thread or another? If she moved in after he was locked up and it was to be a 'stop-gap' then I can see why the family are so livid.

That said,the father is no saint either.

But the father committed the crime three years previously. And he has been tried and punished and is serving his time

Fire_Fox

Dinnie2006 wrote: »

My son spoke with her parents re this when she ended the relationship with.....i cant see us growing old together so i,m ( the Ex) going to move out and get a flat..my Son spoke with her parents re this as worried re the Son as she has a history of not paying her bills ( i have bailiffs letters from when she lived with us) her parents advised him then she could go back there.
She has now changed her mind and decided that she will stay in the house abd tole my son ( not suggested) that on release he can come live with me.. We are also aware that there is a new man on the horizon...we have not told my son of this as he has enough to deal with
As for The Crime..he knows what devastation he left behind...He comes from a close knit Family...he pays the price every day ..
The Son has been through enough... She should not be ripping him away from a part of his Family who spent most of life with....

So what if she doesn't pay HER bills? Your son doesn't live there, the bills should be paid up to the date be left/ the date they split with meter readings. After that your son' has no legal liability for bills on a house he can prove he does not live in and does not have access to. The occupant does, that is the law.

Dinnie2006 wrote: »

Because we havn,t told him...She battered him so much emontially that he is on Anti Depressants..We were advised to try and keep as much calm in his life as possible..The Prison have tried to intervene re access to the son ..she just wont respond

Whist I think it's lovely you support your son, you don't know that you are not a psychiatrist. Mental health problems are the norm amongst prisoners and commonplace amongst those involved in drugs, let alone those who struggle daily with letting their 'devastated' mother down. Every post you make is black devil and white angel, yet it's your son with the custodial sentence. Sorry but butt out, you won't help your grandchild with this poisonous attitude.