Trying for a Baby Part 9

TeamLowe

Big Z that's lovely in a !!!! situation sort of way, big love to you and DH

Lady from the accident came round tonight, luckily she doesn't want to go through insurance. Unluckily it'll be £600 to fix hers. And then however much to Fox mine. Good job I'm getting money back from old house utilities lol

Oh and only realised at ten last night I had no nightime pads, had to use a tampon and pad.

Which reminds me, does anyone else on metformin get a bad tummy when af is in town? Makes my life more pleasant. Honest x x

bigzippy

Yes team lowe, more so right before af (so today, and had a spot or two of red) and at the end of af. I put it down to my ibs being affected by the hormones though rather than metformin, though I am on that too.


Dh does literally tell me that he'd still choose me. :A I'm a lucky woman with or without my unconceived children.

teaandcakeordeath

bigzippy wrote: »

Reminds me of that old cliche: you don't know love til you have a child. I was thinking the other day, you don't know love til you/your body constantly fails to give your husband what he desperately wants, you see the pain in his eyes every time you tell him of AF or a BFN, he cries with you about the child you miss that hasn't even been conceived yet, the plans you've made that have& may never come to fruition, and still loves & sticks by you regardless of all of it, and would still chose you.

That's love.

You couldn't have said this any better... I only really realised today when OH was nearly crying looking at my temps (he's getting his hopes up big time whilst I'm sat there like a little grey cloud knocking him back down) how stressed out all of this is making him, how much he wants a child and how much he is bottling it up. There's no one he can talk to about it though other than me and he won't do that as he knows how guilty I feel that it's me that's broken and rubbish...

I bloody hate all those soppy facebook memes 'like this if you love your child'- it always reminds me of the Chris Rock sketch (warning: contains language some people might find offensive) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LaPHPQt91w8

Substitute the offensive word with 'parents' and that's what happens in my mind everytime I see one of those ridiculous posts...

chocoholic_chick

codemonkey - I always do them when I get home from work which is 6ish and try to hold my wee from about 2, is 4 hours long enough??? Tested again tonight and still not even a hint of a line despite my massive temperature drop this morning, so I just don't know whats going on and now im following the rule of if in doubt BD :rotfl:

Hugs to those who needs them, seems as though a few of you are having a tough time of things at the moment xx

bigzippy

Hahaha teacake, we were saying that exact (Chris a Rock reference) thing last night/night before! :rotfl:

My dh won't talk to anyone about it either, cos he feels like he's betraying me :cool::A He used to talk to his mum, cos she was the only one he "trusted with me" (some of his "friends" had previously has unkind things to say about me and us as a couple, we don't see them anymore, but there's a trust barrier for him now) but obviously that's not an option any more, since she died last year.

sweaty_betty

Hello there - I'm hoping one of you knowledgable people will be able to help me with this. I've taken a couple of sainsbury's tests this morning and this evening (from the same packet) and for each I got the "negative" line straight away, but no control line.

If I get no control line does this mean the entire test is invalid? Or does the negative result still stand? The control line should be vertical, like the "positive" bit.

I've heard it said that no lines mean that the test hasn't worked, but not found anything about a negative but no control line.

TIA

teaandcakeordeath

His family don't know we're trying so he can't/ won't talk to them especially as his mum is a midwife in the hospital that we're having all our fertility investigations in. His friends are all either single or not looking to have kids so he feels like they wouldn't have a clue what he was going on about.

I think the sneak pregnancy FB attack the other day has left him reeling tbh. He's starting to feel like I already do which is the last thing I wanted to happen.

I don't want to talk to him about it as (at the risk of sounding like an alcoholic in denial....) because then he'll realise how obsessed I am by TTC and how much it has consumed me- at least if I don't say it out loud it isn't true! This is the only place I can talk about it without sounding like a total lunatic and he has no idea this is what I do.

What a mess TTC leaves us in!

In other news is anyone watching this horrendous programme on channel four? Who on earth thinks it's normal to spend 8 hours cleaning, washing your windows twice a day and scrubbing your floor five times a day? This woman would have a heart attack if she came to my house!

Lara44

I am, guilty as charged! I was thinking how clean we were compared to those scuzzy people - never considered having the OCD team around for tea :rotfl:

codemonkey

No way I could spend 8 hours a day cleaning. Quite apart from anything else with work and my commute I'm out of the house for 10 hours and that's when the trains are working which is never. By the time I add on getting dressed, showering and making and eating dinner, that would be about 4.5 hours of sleep. Just spent a couple of days straight cleaning and decluttering and its been exhausting and boring. Besides, when it's dirty I don't notice quite how much stuff needs fixed.

I don't tell DH about how I feel about ttc. That would put too much pressure on him but on the other hand not telling him makes for a lot of resentment around ov time so...I don't know. Tcd you summed it up nicely. I think he'd run a mile if he knew just how much I think about all this stuff. And thanks for the Chris Rock clip. I'll be thinking of that the next time someone posts something designed to make the childless feel like worthless failures incapable of love. Of course I can't love anything. I haven't got a baby. I'm obviously a feelingless drone. As soon as I have one everything will be hugs and marshmallows, my poo will smell of freshly baked gingerbread and I'll suddenly be worthwhile member of society. Makes me wonder why I bothered doing my degrees. All I had to do was pop out a baby! :rotfl::rotfl:

Hugs to becca for the bfn and the sa going wrong. Go scream into a pillow. It won't help with the long cycles or the SA and your OH will think you've lost it but it'll make you feel better.

As for the calpol, obviously buying the generic brand is soo much more mse and makes me feel better when I buy it for my pill phobic DH. I will remember their smugness and laugh as I give him my sainsburys own brand. Is it just me or does that sound really dirty.

vic3

8dpo ( longest lp yet!) af due today, spotting ever so slightly, but have been for two days, so not normal. Not holding out any hope though.

Hope all is well x