Relationship Breakdown - Ex Bieng Spiteful

Gigervamp

I think you need to go and pick the things up. How are you expecting her to send the cats to you?

NotSuchASmugMarriedNow

I also think you need to go and pick the stuff up.

It isn't their responsibility to send you your belongings is it? Imagine the time and expense that would be involved in having to pack up someones belongings and arrange for it to be sent to them? Why on earth would anyone do that?

MontyOnTheRun

NotSuchASmugMarriedNow,
Its a long story but yes they are responsible, I was forced to leave my home and cats with one day notice by her mother under the threat that our 8yr relationship was going to be over there and then if I did not.

The plan was I go to my family, get my driving license (long story again) and then come back in a couple of months to live happily ever after in a new cottage that was bieng renovated whilst I was here.

I now realise the mothers plan all along was to get me out of the way and work on her to end it while Im here.

I had no choice - they paid £300 to put me in a taxi with a suitcase and my computers for work!

I think they have every responsibility to return my things at whatever cost - I didnt want to leave and cant return.

Gigervamp

So, how are you expecting to get the cats back?

Jox

If this was me and I wanted my cats back, I would get a large cat carrier, get on a train, go get the cats and not be wanting strangers to solve my problems, sorry to be harsh.

They paid 300 to put you in a taxi, sounds like they really wanted rid of you, why didn't you have any choice?

MontyOnTheRun

Well as for the cats, I dont know because they won't discuss anything!

They originally said they would have the cats driven down to me if necessary. Its almost impossible for me to arrange anything currently as they are so remote there isnt even a proper taxi service there locally.

Im willing to do intensive driving lessons to get my license ASAP and drive up there but Ive hit a brick wall.

She needs to grow up, in a couple of years she'll be 30!

MontyOnTheRun

Hi Jox
Yeah but I have to get access to them - I have no idea what theyre thinking, I could get up there (I can get transport) but theres no sayign they will even open the door let alone give me the cats!

As for taxi - yeah she (mother) wanted rid of me alright, I'd stuck up for my ex when she (mother) verbally laid into her for zero reason whatsoever and thats when all this started. Since I defied her about 4yrs ago its been a slow psychological battle, I thought I could win by being right but her power over her daughter is immense. (This is a woman who thinks slavery should not have been abolished - to give you a taste)
And we/I had money, there was no reason to organise that the way they did - I could have agreed to go, but no she wanted me out her way.

As an example when I stuck up for her, she was in floods of tears distraught, all I did was tell her mother she was out of order and I think she should stop. It eventually turns out my ex blames me for sticking up for her. Go figure. Ive learnt my lesson!!

Ranting but its not like her mother is close to her, she constantly puts her down and has done all her life - her mother only bonds with her when its to team up against someone and this time it was me.

thegirlintheattic

Either get on a train or coach and get the cats or hire a man in a van to get all your stuff.

Chances are they will be glad to be rid of the cats but don't want the fuss of driving down to you.

SUESMITH_2

can't any of your family drive you up there or failing that you must know someone with a car that you could offer to pay petrol to take you?

it just doesn't ring true that you would happily get sent away, and then be allowed to come back later.

Person_one

You're with family? Do none of them drive?

Get in a car, anybody's car who'll take you, and go and get your animals.

I find it completely bizarre that someone who claims to love their pets so much hasn't already done this, to be frank. This is a very odd story, why do you think your ex and her family were willing to go to so much trouble to get rid of you?