Wedding dress code and other demands!

Person_one

Just_want_a_house wrote: »

The idea of your wedding is that you have it how you want to have it and not to try and suit every other person in the world.

Here's the problem ^

Lots of people getting married genuinely do believe that having exactly what they want is more important than their guest's comfort, time or bank balance.

Don't forget, without your guests you'd have no audience or extras for your big production.

The wedding world has gone insane.

red_devil

i know someone who did this. Had the wedding and reception in 4 different places and there were dress codes. They are divorced now i think they were just showing off.

securityguy

Just_want_a_house wrote: »

The idea of your wedding is that you have it how you want to have it and not to try and suit every other person in the world.

That's fine, if you're getting married in a room on your own. But other people are not there as the cast for the film you're directing, unless you're paying them Equity scale. The idea of a wedding is not to demonstrate your selfish unconcern for your guests.

Errata

No offence to the OP, but it all sounds very chavvy and My Big Fat Wedding to me.

Gloomendoom

Person_one wrote: »

Here's the problem ^

Lots of people getting married genuinely do believe that having exactly what they want is more important than their guest's comfort, time or bank balance.

Don't forget, without your guests you'd have no audience or extras for your big production.

The wedding world has gone insane.

Well said.

podperson

Oh dear, is it a black and white dress code? I do think that looks tacky for weddings - and like you said a bit chavvy. In fact, is it naughty that I'm now wondering if the bride wants people in black and white so her dayglo pink dress stands out better? :rotfl:

Lara44

I wouldn't have a problem with a general dress code, like Black Tie. But specifying a particular colour is taking the mickey!!!

Kildare

Just_want_a_house wrote: »

The idea of your wedding is that you have it how you want to have it and not to try and suit every other person in the world

While I agree its your special day if you want guests to come you need to think about them too. I've been invited to weekend long hen do's where I'm expected to outlay £150 just for the package then drinks, food etc. are extra on top and when you try to turn these things down you treated as not being supportive about the wedding. Couples need to remember that not everyone wants to go away for weekend hen/stag and then pay again to go away for the weekend for the wedding on top of what they were more than happy to pay for in the first place : gift, outfit, possibly a night in a hotel. Any couple that then puts a dress code on top of this obviously just wants no-one to turn up or really annoyed guests!

Edited to add: It's actually worse when the bride knows you can afford the weekend away and doesn't get that you just don't want to spend your money on what she wants to do as you'd rather spend the money on a holiday with your OH - I miss when they were Hen/Stag nights!!

stir_crazy

Just_want_a_house wrote: »

It spoilt it for me a little, knowing that people were 'scoffing' at my and my OH special day. The idea of your wedding is that you have it how you want to have it and not to try and suit every other person in the world.

Hope I dont come across as harsh, as I said merely just my little slant on things

I also got married not long ago, and the way we wanted it was for our guests to have a good time. Unfortunately we couldn't afford to pay for drinks for our guests all night, but we ensured they weren't standing around bored by having a magician during our photos (a sleight of hand sort of magician, not the balloon animals sort!), a sweetie buffet and a band who got everyone up partying. My guests are still saying what a great time they had, which makes it all the better a day for me.

It was in stark contrast to my cousin who also got married in the same hotel , but made sure the guests were waiting around by turning up 45 mins late to the ceremony, delaying the meal by 2 hours while she and her groom had pictures taken (by the photographer who, by the way, doesn't DO guests), and wrote the groom's speech which meant he wittered on for half an hour(yes, this was just the groom's speech) about how great she was.

She had a great day because it was exactly how she wanted it. But all her guests remember were the bad points, which is what people will remember about the wedding the OP is invited to.

securityguy

stir_crazy wrote: »

but made sure the guests were waiting around by turning up 45 mins late to the ceremony, delaying the meal by 2 hours while she and her groom had pictures taken

Many years ago, I went to a wedding where we were expected to sit around for ages, without any food or drink, in a stuffy room, while photographs, videos and (presumably) a full production of an opera by Wagner happened outside.

It was a hot, sunny day, and after an hour or so a few of us decided that we weren't going to waste it, and left and got a drink and a meal nearby. We didn't go back to the wedding. We weren't the first to leave, as several couples with children had already gone. And we weren't the last, either, as from what I heard, by the time the meal was served, about half of the guests had left. The bride and her family were apparently distraught, but it's hard to work up much sympathy.