*The Holly and the Ivy* and the You Know What 2013 Chatter Thread.

mrs-moneypenny

hugs wuvvies, hope things work out. id have a gift and keep the door open.

hope all are well, been rushing about today, macmillian coffee morning then work then hair appt so only just got time to sit down and read through.

princesskitty29

wuvvies I don't have any children so I can't speak from personal experience, however a good friend of mine went through a very similar thing with her daughter. Her daughter went a bit off the rails when she turned 16 and insisted on moving out. My friend found the whole thing very difficult and was often upset. It wasn't an easy time but her daughter is now in her early twenties and they have rebuilt their relationship. Of course I am not saying you have a bad relationship with her or even that it will take years to sort out, I think I just wanted to say that i've know someone in a similar situation and they have come through it. I know you are still in a difficult situation now, but hopefully once your daughter has been gone for a little while she will start to appreciate things that she didn't before. x

princesskitty29

JennieCharm wrote: »

Hello all, What is "The Christmas Magazine"? Is it like a Good Housekeeping one or something?

From what I remember from last year it is a stand alone Christmas magazine, so not one of the usual magazines you find on the shelves. I remembered last year I wasn't overly impressed with it, it was more fluff that substance - but I don't think it will put me off buying it again this year! :rotfl:

I do prefer magazines such as Prima and Good Housekeeping at Christmas, I find they have more useful and interesting stuff in them. I got my copy of Good Food magazine through the other day and that's got a few bits in it to get ahead for Christmas, however next month's is going to have a lot more so looking forward to that one.

curly33

The Christmas Magazine is exactly what it's called. OH got mine in Smiths for £3.99. It's in a cellophane wrap and says it comes with a free 36 page festive food mag and free gift wrap and tags. It's white and red with a Christmas Wreath on the front - mine was with the newspapers. I have no idea if it's good or not as I've not opened mine yet! I don't really buy magazines but do love a festive one

msgigglewick

wuvvies.. i have children/step children all around your dd's age. (18-15.. 5 of them to be exact) ... i am a great believer in treat them in how they want to be treated but while they are under my roof they respect the rules of it.... If one wanted to move out then so be it.. i'd be upset for sure but i would say i'd be there for them as a mother, i don't expect to be mouthed off at or talked about .. specially when its lies.. Regards xmas i'd just do the main pressie too. She can't have her bed and lay in it too Shes chosen to move out and start the adult life. Treat her like it.. she'll either love it or hate it..

Personally i went off to college at 16 but worked and had to care for my newborn baby brother aswell as college between 16-18 so had to go home every night todo those too... I had moved into my own home at 18 but i was ready at 16. I can understand her wanting to move on but there is no need for the attitude.. im guessing its a front. If shes seen as been tough and stroppy then she obviously can't live at home can she i bet shes really hurting too. You're doing fine.

redbooties

Own_My_Own wrote: »

Saw this on the Lidls leaflet and I love it. But I already have a nice draught excluder

http://www.lidl.co.uk/cps/rde/SID-DF7A9CD2-B09A18BB/www_lidl_uk/hs.xsl/our-offers-2491.htm?action=showDetail&id=5988

Oh thanks for that I'm going to get some of these for the front door, there's a terrible draught coming under it

Own_My_Own

Ok I'm gonna hide behind a wall but - does anyone else find Pinterest boring after a while ?

I saw something on there earlier that I want to make, so rather than forget where it was I opened an account and pinned it. I then thought that I would keep looking incase there was anything else I liked.
Which there has been, but I feel like I am just looking at the same things over and over and over again.

Baby_boo

Hi everybody,I've finally caught up with you all lol. Wuvvies im sorry your having such a difficult time with your daughter, I think like the majority of the posts that you should not change the rules of your household because
that's part of the stability of your home.my two are grown up now which means they just bring a different set of problems.I remember saying to
one of mine I love you unconditionally but that doesn't mean I like you right now.
speaking of growing up I still do stockings for my two along with their gifts.
reading all your plans has made me think about the memories of my own
childhood my health is delicate to say the least,so I would like to make new
Memories for my two.So to start with I have ordered them both a believe bell with a dvd each of polar express for their stocking, I'm very lucky that
I am close to them both and they will see the significance of what I'm doing.Ideas are very welcome. Boo x

FeistyFidget

msgigglewick wrote: »

Teehee glad to put a smile on peoples faces..

I'm fighting sleep. Im here on my own wiht dd4 so trying very hard not to drift off cause she'll be up to god knows what lol Insomnia is liveable apart from these odd days my body gives up and goes OI sleep woman.. I know if i slept this afternoon i'll be awake at 2:30am again like the last 7 nights MUST NOT SLEEP!!!

I couldn't even bring myself to walk the mile and half into town this morning to get the xmas mag shall sit and read my kirstie book tonight again instead lol. Postman has brought me a mini bottle of baileys and my latest knitting mag though which made me smile.

Don't know if i mentioned by my dd1 came home from college the other day and she had had a meeting with her tutor.. Shes being fast tracked through level one professional catering as she seems to be far too advanced to be stuck doing it. which is fab news They are also helping her find a part time job as level 2 they like you to be in a work placement. Hopefully will give her a confidence boost.

Fantastic news

disabled_NCIS_fan wrote: »

I hadn't thought of that. Minimal cooking skills required and could look fancy lol. My parents have been great, I still live at home, and if they hadn't been cheering me on and helping every step of the way the last few years I would have given up by now.

Medication wise, the doctors ask when you ring up here if you have enough of your other things for over Christmas, was shocked when I rang last year as they never did ask at my last surgery. We are slowly stocking up on cough medicine etc.

Went in to Lidl today, that had the Christmas sweets etc out. Was very tempted to get some chocolate covered gingerbread rings, stopped myself though.

Very jealous - we've had to switch our weekly shop to Aldi and each week I get excited hoping they have the gingerbread hearts, and they never flipping do Maybe next week

wuvvies wrote: »

hello all. thanks so much for your lovely words. im still texting her but shes cutting herself off completely from me. i have actually sent a text saying day or night i can come and get you when your ready to come home. she was my perfect child but as soon as she turned 16 and met this boy she went off the rails. her dad is a pain in the !!!!. he said to me... why dont you tell her she doesnt have to eat your stupid meals with the family. she can make herself something when ever shes hungry. thats not how we do it in my house. ive got a little boy and he will be confused why he has to eat veg every day while shes having chocolate. the day before she left i made chicken pie one of her favs...totally from scratch.roast potatoes and carrots and kale. i called the kids. she picked up her meal and scraped the whole lot in the bin then TOOK a penguin from my pantry. my husband ( her step dad) didnt see or he would have gone mad. in my house nobody has to clear a plate but your expected to eat as much as you can. she loves junk and will live off it.I am far to soft with her and im going to make it clear IF i have her back ( which of course I will) she will live by my rules. I must be strong. I have been beside myself with utter pain as she was my friend. Ive lost so much. I have my gorgeous little boy but he is happy to do his own this where as she would follow me everywhere and always did things with me. I have told her ive lost my friend in the hope she will understand and she just says "so"

anyway there is a christmas point to this.... i always do christmas eve bags and christmas stockings. would you cut these out for her and just do main presents. a) she may not be here but b) will she think im just making a point?? i have another daughter and shes at uni and she doesnt have christmas eve bags or christmas stocking just the main. I very much need to be done and dusted by november as i having an op and will only have one arm the other will be in plaster. all presents need to be sorted and wrapped by then

so..... treat her as a grown up and just get her the main risking her getting upset or just go for it all and risk her not being here.

Personally, if you can afford it then I would do the Christmas eve hampers and stockings for all 3 - if she is back by then, then it will be a real emphasis on family - if she isn't back, then just had it over and tell her she can feel like her family is with her even if she is enjoying Christmas elsewhere. I know it's hard, but try not to do it resentfully. If you can show her that it is a true extension of family love and tradition and not a guilt trip, then perhaps she will feel bad herself. It's no excuse for terrible behavior, but the hormones that start raging at that age are a nightmare (I can barely remember bursting into tears over the silliest things) add in the pressure from this boy and it will be a recipe for disaster. Stay strong and stick to your rules x

[Deleted User]

Thankyou for the poem! I have an absence of creativity and am so happy to have discovered such a welcoming group.