*The Holly and the Ivy* and the You Know What 2013 Chatter Thread.

girlinayellowdress

Finally managed to have a sit down.

Had to move so much furniture round because its decided (note not I've decided) that if my dad is going to spend his last days at home it will be at my house. Not sure how I feel about it and it might not happen yet but I'm going to see the consultant tomorrow. One thing that took me by surprise is that they scanned my father and his heart failure is actually caused because he has cancer of the heart. I've looked online a little about it and it is rare but I would be interested if anyone has had any experience with it.

Think I'm going to have some me time somewhen this week, even if its just curling up with a book for an afternoon this week.

Own_My_Own

Pinksteps wrote: »

Finally managed to have a sit down.

Had to move so much furniture round because its decided (note not I've decided) that if my dad is going to spend his last days at home it will be at my house. Not sure how I feel about it and it might not happen yet but I'm going to see the consultant tomorrow. One thing that took me by surprise is that they scanned my father and his heart failure is actually caused because he has cancer of the heart. I've looked online a little about it and it is rare but I would be interested if anyone has had any experience with it.

Think I'm going to have some me time somewhen this week, even if its just curling up with a book for an afternoon this week.

How does ds feel about this ?

How are his legs doing ?

caitlyn22

My SiL-to-be is actually OK in small doses and OH and I have a few plans to ensure she doesn't cause us any dramas on our wedding day. He is most worried she will do the thing that annoys him the most - which is difficult to describe until you meet her but put simply, she's a bit obsessed with ghosts and spirits and regularly points out 'visiting' dead relatives. Not just as in "ooh I had an eerie moment the other night" but every five flipping minutes! As she loves a bit of drama and being the centre of attention, OH is worried she's going to make some kind of speech at our wedding about one of their distant relatives (who I never actually met and wouldn't have been invited to the wedding anyway) I think he thinks this would be a bit inappropriate given neither my mum nor dad will be with us. I have tried to stress that I am determined not to be bothered by anything she does or says, but we eventually settled on getting my sister to make a toast to absent loved ones, so that will hopefully take the wind out of OH's sister's sails! We also have to have a no pictures of us on Facebook rule as OH's family were really rude and posted pics from their phones of the bride's dress/bridesmaids/cake etc the day before the wedding had even taken place!!

Glad you had a good night Feisty! I think planning stuff with your friends is the key, something to always look forward to then, no matter how far away you are. Let's be honest, we can be a few streets away from our friends and still never see them! If it helps, I have an HTC and I love it! Everything on screen is done with a little animation/ 'flourish' which I remember be irritating at first but you soon get used to it.

CHRISSYG poor you! Sounds like you've taken a real tumble. Hope you feel better soon.

Don't think I know anyone who does the mythical 'glowing and radiant' pregnancy SugarSpun! Sure even Kate Middleton is sweating and shuffling around in her tracksuit at home Have fun at your scan, the weeks are flying by!

Pinksteps, my dad eventually died of lung cancer but it had spread everywhere and we were told all secondary cancers in the upper body have similar final stages (and were given a horrible leaflet on what to expect!) but obviously people do differ. He used to get a cough and terrible hiccups and couldn't lie down, so we had him in one of those chairs that recline, which he slept in too, on and off. It was good for his legs too which swelled up. It was like he had a terrible flu to be honest, rattly cough, not interested in eating, exhausted and quite feverish at times. We kept ice cubes and cotton wool soaked in water to wipe his mouth and he liked having his hands massaged with hand cream. He got too ill to be at home in the end, and had to be admitted to hospital, where he did nothing but sleep for two days. On the second day we came in and he'd eaten breakfast, washed and shaved and was sat up in bed, but the Macmillan nurse (/angel!) told us this was typical and that it would still only be a few hours and she was exactly right. She also ensured he got way more morphine than was probably allowed, but it was clear she thought he was still in pain so did what she had to do and we will be forever grateful. If you can bear it, we got a lot of info from the Macmillan site, there was an online forum where I read a lot of advice, but be prepared, it's a tough read in many places. I am so sorry you've having to go through this, but I promise you that the horrors of the next few weeks will eventually be replaced with happier memories and it will eventually seem like something that somebody else went through.

girlinayellowdress

OMO DS is okay at the moment but he has not seen his grandad for just over a week, the day grandad went into hospital. He is coming with me to the hospital tomorrow but I do not think for one moment he will want to see his grandad. To be perfectly honest I can't see my dad coming out, he was apparently curled up in pain yesterday.

caitlyn22 Thank you, that's all I want is honesty. I really would like a timescale but we cannot seem to get one from the consultants. Hopefully tomorrow I can talk honestly and openly to one of the nurses as they deal with it every day. He wants me to cut his hair tomorrow and odd as it seems I feel like he is preparing himself.

FeistyFidget

Pink I just want you to know that you and your family are in my thoughts. You are a brave lass and from what you have said, your family are very lucky to have you. I can second Macmillan, my 'uncle' that has just passed was nursed through to the end at home (discharged from hopsital a few days before he died) and my auntie has said the Macmillan Nurse was an absolute god send.

OMO it gets worse, DH has just come home to tell me they had a white ipad generation 3 traded in at work. Our generation 1 keeps glitching and crashing, DH uses it a lot and I really love being able to watch TV in the bath, plus the whole reason the new phone was purchased is because our ipad has no camera. Well, we could have the new one if we traded in our ipad, my ipod touch (we have a lot of gadgets left from our disposable income days) and put £70 towards it, and I'm urging him to do it! I think I'm having a mini rebellion - DH has already said he isn't fussed about moving (extra costs if we stayed put would fall on me) and he's not put any money into the saving pot, I'm obviously annoyed about this and cutting my nose off to spite my face, doh!

dropsofjupiter

Ameyturtle wrote: »

Happy sleepy Sunday everyone! Things are still abut mental but I'm not letting them get to me anymore.

I do have a question for you all though how do I go about claiming tax I shouldn't have paid from a company who has changed its name, basically the woman closed the other business and took on a new name how do I claim that back caus I'm paying out in tax where shouldn't be. Also it's too late now to change my tax code for lush for this year but again I have tax to claim back and I've no idea how. Someone else I know says she sends her p45s in to the tax office and then they send her a cheque for the money.

Sorry that was abit ranty love and hugs all round

http://www.hmrc.gov.uk/incometax/overpaid-thro-job.htm

Last time I rang them they told me to send in my (original not copy) P60 (form you receive from your employer in April/May stating how much you've earned in a tax year if you're still employed by them) and P45 (same form but received when you leave an employer) to my local tax office (which is now HMRC Po Box 1970, Liverpool, l75 1WX as they've changed the way they handle post), with a covering letter just advising you've overpaid your tax and would like a refund. I got my P60s back after a couple of weeks and a tax calculation with cheque a couple of weeks after that. Hope that helps.

lizalloareds

Pink thinking of you

riskyb

Sorry about your dad Pinksteps

craftymummy_2

sorry to hear all the not so good news, hope things will improve for you all (as much as they can)
back to school tomorrow after a week off, not really looking forward to it....counting back the days till Easter, lol. I'm glad it's a short half term.

Trendyjenny

Not looking forward to school either and I'm the teacher lol x

Yes it does mean riding in a llama x

Big hugs to everyone x