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What's the ideal gap between children?
Comments
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There are plenty of reasons to have children close together. You might want the kids to grow together and be constant, or you just might not have times on your side.
Well I have two kids and they have 2 years gap between their age. I think this is the best ideal gap between the kids.
Thanks,
Kevin0 -
ciderwithrosie wrote: »There's 17 months between my oldest 2 and it was OK, the younger one copied the older, so he walked and was potty trained quite early. They both liked the same things, have mutual friends and are still close now at 22 and 21
There's a 3 yr 4 month gap between the 2nd and 3rd though and this was too much really (in our family anyway) as the older 2 never included him much and he liked different things to them anyway, e.g. they're both into sport and he's not.
21 months between our sons (now 18 and 16) and our experience is similar.0 -
Hello to the newborn thread ladies...
I'm struggling this pregnancy I'll admit with awful SPD - part of the other rationale to get pregnant again fast was I'd rather be doing it with a 19lb baby who still stays put where you put her for the bulk of the time than a larger and heavier toddler who can make a run for it - knowing I was likely to get the wrecked pelvis again!Little miracle born April 2012, 33 weeks gestation and a little toughie!0 -
I think the woman in the article must have lacked some serious organisational skills. No doubt having kids so close in age is hard work but either she has kids from hell who cry all day and never sleep, with a wholly unsupportive husband, or she was being a little over dramatic. Cannot even remember washing her hair. Please.
Personally I wouldnt opt for a small age gap, I got quite broody after DS2 as he was such a good baby but then the tantrums started - it would have been hard work. There is a 2.5 year age gap between DS1&2 and I found this quite manageble.
I would say anything between 2 an 4 years is 'ideal' but like others have said its an individual choice.0 -
Can I please ask why this thread was moved? I was particularly interested in the opinion of mums (EDIT: oops, sorry Kevin! Good to have your input as well!). I don't understand these new boards on MSE
Anyway, thanks everyone for their experiences - it's a real interesting read
I'm sure once I've had one baby I'll be so exhausted I won't want to think of another one just yet!!! But I guess it also depends on nature / luck.
My mum had 3 years between each of the 5 of us and my sisters have gone for about 2.5 years gap.Previous debt: £14K :embarasse Debt free: Sept '03MFW#42 Mortgage OP savings £4271.18/£12000 2019
Started dating OH Mar '12, married Oct '12, Walnut born Dec ' 12 :A SPC 12: 99 £38.05/£500 Make money Jan: £412.34/£310 :T Feb: £88.79/£280 May: £215.52/£310 June: £18.98/£300
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Previous debt: £14K :embarasse Debt free: Sept '03
MFW#42 Mortgage OP savings £4271.18/£12000 2019
Started dating OH Mar '12, married Oct '12, Walnut born Dec ' 12 :A SPC 12: 99 £38.05/£500 Make money Jan: £412.34/£310 :T Feb: £88.79/£280 May: £215.52/£310 June: £18.98/£300
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It depends what kind of baby you end up with - I can honestly say with pregnancy insomnia, anxiety (although the birth did result in me ending up with horrid PTSD but that's another story), SPD and my insides being used as a football - I got more sleep even through the whole newborn waking up all night phase than I did when pregnant... and once she started dropping night feeds it was pretty much a breeze on that front - but I have a very very easy-natured (she has her moments) little lady who will self-settle to go to sleep (it makes the situation worse if you fuss over her) and is a very contented, placid little thing.
If you've got a non-sleeping un-putdownable high-needs baby you might think differently!Little miracle born April 2012, 33 weeks gestation and a little toughie!0 -
I don't think it matters really it's just what feels right for you and after all you can't always plan these things whether you start trying straight away or leave it, it can happen more quickly than you thought or take years. Children can be close, or not, at any stage. We would have had a 19 mth gap, but due to miscarriage I have a 2.4 yr gap between my two and they are close (most days!) and I hope this will last. Mum had 22 months between DB & me and we were always close til he met SIL. Then there are 9 yrs between my little sis & me and due to the age gap we were never close until she reached her teens. Now we both have kids (her kids are 2 & 4 yr gap from my youngest) we and they are very close.
Mostly I think it depends on when you can face OH getting near you in that way again after the birth:rotfl:Be not so busy making a living that you forget to make a life0 -
3.5 years between mine - and that meant I only had one child in nursery at once, which helped ease the childcare cost burden.0
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There are four of us and less than a year between the eldest and the second, also less than a year between the second and the third, and just over one year before the third and the fourth.
I think my parents are crazy, but although they have nothing to compare it to they say it was relatively easy in that they were in a routine for nappies, night feeds etc anyway. To them it 'made sense' to have all their children in quick succession.
I love the fact that when we were all growing up we could all wear the same clothes, we all had the same friends and went to the same school etc. Now we are all in our mid-twenties we are still really close friends and I love that. Of course, I know no different (and do wish I'd had a much older brother for some reason!).0
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