Being blackmailed

PippaGirl_2

Miduck is absolutely right. Parking wars around here and my dd has had her car scratched many times when parking near a certain neighbours house, spoke to police and they said "don't park there then". So if you want vacant space outside your house on a public road the thing to do is scratch people's cars to make sure they park elsewhere because the police don't care and will tell people to just park elsewhere when people tell them.

PippaGirl_2

ragdoll, my church has dozens of TV's to give away, try looking on freecycle or contact local churches/charities, you will find a free TV somewhere if you look.

BillyB

As Patty said even if you give him the stuff back he may end up reporting you anyway. I would stand up to him and not give him anything, especially since while he was with you he didnt contribute anything and sold the stuff you had originally. Like you said you haven't done anything wrong so dont really have anything to worry about and you also said you have plenty of people who can back you up that he never actually lived with you. You say in your original post he had hundreds off you and never contributed anything in return, so I'd hold onto it.

exarmydreamer

Did you say he put the car you paid for in his name. He will try to take this off you as well, me thinks. Might be worth putting this down to experience and let it lie.

tattycath

ragdoll1924 wrote: »

This is a bit of an odd one im afraid but could really do with some advise. I left my husband 3yrs ago due to domestic abuse and now live on my own with my 3 young children. Im a working mum er and manage to work around my childrens hours but thankfully get help with my rent (housing benefit, council tax benefit, working and child tax credits) to which I am extremely grateful for but live on a very limited budget. After living on my own for 3yrs I met a man last December and started going out with him, at last I thought I had met a decent man and he use to stay over most weekends (didnt want to live with him as Im still recovering from domestic abuse and have learnt to live happily on my own but appreciated company at weekends). Anyway he wasnt what I thought he was and I ended up in yet another abusive relationship, not physical but mental if you understand. I then caught him on dirty dating sites and chatting to women on line etc. Basically he finished the relationship 5wks ago, but because in the time he was with me he sold a lot of items in my house, tv, kids wii, tv stand and other smaller items but let me have his old tv and xbox. Now he has gone he wants it all back, I would willingly give it to him but he sold my stuff and it would leave me and kids without a main tv or a xbox which my children play on. I have also given him money over the months from sales of other items, he has had hundreds out of me! He is now saying that if I dont give him these things back he is going to ring up benefits and say he lived with me permanently!! He wasnt registered as living anywhere else as he lived at his dads, im so frightened its making me ill but dont want to give into his threats as he has taken so much from me and cost me so much money, he is also saying he is going to get a solicitor involved to get his things back??? Any advise would be greatly appreciated :-(

Has he only verbally said this or is it in a text message/e.mail?

weeta_bix

Depending on how scared I was of the guy, I would consider telling them that you would give back his things, when he repays you for the things of yours that were sold to enable you to be able to afford to have him in the house. See what he makes of that.

Is he close to his Dad? Is his Dad aware of how he is treating you?

Failing that, I would go to the police. I agree with Patty, even if they don't do anything at least it is logged in case you have any more trouble. I imagine he knows your history and that he might be able to intimidate you because of that, which is so wrong. What if he intimidates your kids next instead of you? At least if they have it logged they may be able to esculate it further more quickly if anything else happens. If they make you give the things back then so be it. Your kids may be unhappy for a while, but they will calm down and consoles come and go something better and more shiny will be round the corner soon enough.

I really feel for you and wish you all the best.

ragdoll1924

I managed to get the car back because I had proof that I paid money to his dad so I managed to sort that issue out. He has only verbally said he would report me. I know a lot of you have said to give the tv and xbox back but he took my tv (because it was a bit smaller and older then his) and he took my childrens Wii (because he said the xbox was better), so thats the reason I am not willing to give his tv and xbox back.

BigAunty

Contact Womens Aid who will be able to give you advice on how to stay safe and deal with the intimidation.

tattycath

Can you not talk to his Dad maybe? Does his Dad know what he's like -that he sold your stuff and that he's blackmailing you?

dandelionclock30

If hes going to report you- then he will do it anyway.You say you've done nothing wrong-then you have nothing to worry about.
Dont let him have you over a barrell- Ignore him, block his number off your mobile, block his emails etc.
If he turns up at your house-dont answer the door and if he wont go away call the police.
I wouldnt be giving him anything back, hes trying to mess with your mind and control you. If you get solicitors letters which I doubt considerig the cost of seeing a solictor, then go to the CAB.