'supporting each other through really tough times'

kidcat

heavenleigh wrote: »

Can't read all posts, just in need of a hug xxxx

Hugs heavenleigh

Thanks cranky will do tomorrow, am on phone now so posting links is awkward

monnagran

About being alone, I suppose it depends on what your marriage was like. Mine was pretty dreadful although I'd known him for 7 years when we married. My own fault, all the signs of impending doom were there, I just didn't interpret them.
Can't say I was lonely. 2 teenage sons and all their friends + various lodgers meant that the house was always hectic and noisy. I was so damaged that I couldn't contemplate another relationship, but was quite happy to be on my own. Also happy to be sharing with the Rev - it's so easy. No emotional hassle, companionship when needed, everything relaxed. Mind you, it's a bit like living in a sit-com. She takes OTT to a whole new level and if I tell you that her internet username is wackyrev you might guess what sort of character she is. I still like being on my own though and my bedroom is my sanctuary.

Katie: will keep everything crossed for your DD on Friday. It's nice to know that good things still happen.

x

Edited to give heavenleigh lots of hugs.

Softstuff

Hugs Heavenleigh *hugs*

Fuddle, don't worry about the crazy woman. If the police couldn't do anything about a chap that stalked me and tried to kick the darned door down, they sure as heck won't do anything about a grizzly sick puppy. Poor Alfie, I think if I'd have been there I'd have bitten the child for him :rotfl: I think it's a sign of how gentle and restrained he is that he didn't at least give her a nip.

Kidcat, sorry your mum is being "unreasonable", that's me putting it politely as most other things get filtered out *hugs*. To resort to attacks on your parenting is completely "unreasonable", given how devoted you are. Best ignored I feel. I very much doubt the other relatives she's saying things to are unaware of how she behaves when she doesn't get her own way. They probably take what she says with a large pinch of salt.

Popperwell wrote: »

Softstuff the space station astronauts keep tweeting images of the Earth and recently posted some of the recent floods in Australia...

Yep, I'd bet there's more blue than usual visible.

mardatha wrote: »

It's our 47th anniversary today (I got married very young. I wis 2) and as usual, we aren't talking. :rotfl::rotfl::rotfl: Why break the habit of a lifetime?

Congrats on the anniversary Mardatha, and what a lovely gift he gave you, peace and quiet for a whole day

I've done my physio exercises. Not a walk in the park and no fun at all. Grrr.

Byatt

Cranky, yes I believe there are similarities. I do understand the anger when someone close dies but had forgotten until you mentioned it.

For me it was the suddeness too, literally overnight my marriage was over. It wasn't a good marriage that's the thing either, but I had settled with it. Anyway, it was a shock and I was laid low with grief. But I have to say it was the loss of everything that's taken its toll. My DD hasn't recovered from it, it blights all areas of her life and relationships with men, especially her father.

savingqueen

Evening everyone (or good morning to the early birds!) I am up too late at night and up too early in the morning - well for my liking anyways!

Hugs to all especially heavenleigh, kidcat and fuddle. Fuddle and kidcat - you are both amazing and have done diddly squat wrong - stand your ground and hold your head up high. Heavenleigh do you need to offload love? ... we're here for you.

Been a good but hectic day today in lots of ways. Had disasters in the baking area this eve to round it all off. Forget to put salt in my bread and probably daft but as already made and oven was half full decided to bake. Will probably taste dreadful I know.

Then my passion cake.... haven't got many different size cake tins so improvised with a loaf tin when the cake needed a much wider tin.The extra 6 little muffins came out beautifully - well DH scoffed 3 and said so but the main cake fell apart. Have re-baked the big 'un and it tastes ok but all broken so will have some nice puddings with custard on top! Wanted to take the big cake or 6 little ones to a friend's tomorrow as she is making lunch for 3 of us. Will have to be just 3 little ones as on a course in the morning. Can blame DH for eating the rest and won't even be a porky!

Talking about the course. I started a self defence course last week and think I mentioned the strange woman who kept making rude jokes, lots of sexual innuendos etc and a... ahem sort of staged role play ... will leave the details to your imagination but it involved shouting out "down female dog!" :eek:. This is a group of mums in a school hall in school time with lines of primary school children, some very little, filing by at the time :eek:. I just didn't know what to do at the time and so did nothing - I think the woman is emotionally very insecure and the loud/rude mouth is a cover-up. Anyway one of the course organisers phoned me about something unrelated the next day and I told her what happenned. She is going to speak to the tutor (who said nothing to the woman), say the school have complained rather than me. I am now worrying that the tutor will say something to the woman or class as a whole and somehow she will know its me and I will feel awful like a prude and a grass. I know that's daft and illogical - I did the right thing in a school setting and for my own personal comfort. I am anxious enough going to the course to start with without all this drama. Why oh why didn't the tutor say anything? I think he felt embarrassed in a group of woman, poor guy but he needs to think about his role as a tutor leading a group.

ok better calm down and get myself off to bed. tomorrow is another day folks

night night to anyone still up
sq:)

dreaming

Byatt wrote: »

Cranky, yes I believe there are similarities. I do understand the anger when someone close dies but had forgotten until you mentioned it.

For me it was the suddeness too, literally overnight my marriage was over. It wasn't a good marriage that's the thing either, but I had settled with it. Anyway, it was a shock and I was laid low with grief. But I have to say it was the loss of everything that's taken its toll. My DD hasn't recovered from it, it blights all areas of her life and relationships with men, especially her father.

Delurking to say I can remember this feeling too - especially as life was just beginning to be a bit easier for us. However, one of the main areas of contention between us was cash - I always wanted to save , he to spend, and he ran up major debts time and time again. Since our split (1999) I have worked and saved so although I am facing redundancy in a few months I can treat it as early retirement (I'll be 58). He on the other hand was complaining to our DD that he (and his partner) had never been so broke in his life. We have, however, remained amicable and he and his partner come to the children's birthdays etc. and we can all be pleasant to each other. I was determined that my children would never feel they could only invite us one at a time. And I believe the saying that "the best revenge is living well".
Although I have been out on a few dates since, most of them turn into friendships as I tend to be a loner (but not lonely). Plus, after working so hard for what little security I have now I would be too wary of losing it to want to live with anyone again.
I love this thread - everyone is so supportive of each other.

ginnyknit

Hugs to heavenleigh, glad you popped on even if you are not upto reading. Now you know we are all here for you hunny. xx

Kidcat and fuddly one both of you are fab people and generous of spirit so I hope tomorrow is a better day for you both.

monnagran sounds like you have the companionship with a fellow crazy person that works well.

Im moving in with Cranky if I end up on my own, arent I Cranky she is adopting me as Georges new Grandma and cheif cat rustler

Mar did you get a medal yet for long service? they do give them dont they?

My OH had a very poorly night last night and I packed a bag for hospital but we got through it...again. The bag packing usually ensures we dont have to go, IYKWIM. Today he woke up and turned into a ranty monster but soon fizzled out as always and suddenly became all sweetness and light which usually signifies he was in the wrong :rotfl: I get upset but after 32 years I should be used to him.

meanmarie

Heavenleigh....hugs

Fuddle....stupid woman with her disobedient child!

Mardatha....congratulations on 47 years and the day of peace!

Kidcat....have the same Tshirt....

Monnagran....think that we really may be sisters

Cranky...hugs to you and George.

Stay safe and warm everybody

Marie

jem132

Hi all can't sleep again arhhhhhh.

Well day 3 of not smoking arhhh, when I went to pick the boys up from school yesterday I was informed that the school has had all there ipads stolen he was so upset as his had all his reporters work on it also the school we share our head with had there's stolen too. I am so disappointed most of the children that go to this school have some sort of disability or sibling with one.... And to top all that off iv just gone in the kitchen and the dog has eaten my shoes.
As for been on my own I wish I had stayed in my own house and dh styed hear I know that sounds really bad but I constantly worry about if we fall out where will me and thenkids go?? I can't stop worrying about it. You never. Know and now I have no money. Of my own ethier I have to ask him for it I really dont like it at all. To be honest I feel really. Depressed about it all xxxx

Pooky

Morning all

Wet and wild here again, lots of soggy moggies to contend with, one wanted a hug at 4am and he was so wet I didn't quite know how to hold him. Floor washing and bed changing on the agenda for today then.

My divorce was so utterly different from those mentioned here as I was the instigator, I guess I'd worked all my feelings and emotions out a long time before actually asking him to leave, the day he went was the start of a new life for me. I met my new hubby 9 days later, pure fluke, we met online, sent emails, chatted on the phone and then met in person a few weeks later. We've been together 13 years this year which proved everyone wrong because of course according to everyone we both knew it was a rebound relationship and either one of us was bound to be lying about something, cos that's what people online do. Hah! Lots of humble pie has been eaten by both families.

Need to light a fire to get some washing dry, the house looks like a Chinese laundry.