first days of retirement - Decompression Zone

moneyistooshorttomention

lessonlearned

Sorry things didnt work out as you planned and about your husbands illness. I have watched the toll being a carer has taken on various people over the years - including recently a similar age friend to me (who also had a husband who had to go into a home in the end) - and it is indeed a heavy burden I have seen these people bearing:eek:. I could see clearly that my friends energy levels and Own Life were being "shot to pieces" whilst all that was going on. I never found the man I wanted to marry, so have been single throughout and have certainly been "counting my blessings" in recent years that I am single now that I'm older, but at least don't have a husband to worry about.

Nice to hear you are getting some time and energy for yourself now - I can't begin to imagine just how much strain you must have been under for so long. Hope your business works out well.

My plan for today is more tidying and ring an estate agent for a bit of a general chat as to whether/when/maybe/who knows....

Time for breakfast and then I'll get the neighbours "hanging out their windows" goggling and getting something to talk about again - as in "What on earth is money doing.....all that stuff being removed and that cleaning up being done?" There was several of them obviously agog and trying to pretend they werent wondering what was going on yesterday...:rotfl:

lessonlearned

Are you thinking of moving??. That is my master plan.:D

The house is on the market, two viewings but no offers yet. I'm not too concerned - I can bide my time.

We've been here 25 years and I'm quite liking the idea of a new start.

Savvy_Sue

money, I wouldn't try to remove the graffiti yourself, just keep reporting. You may damage the wall surfaces for starters, and if you make yourself a 'squeaky wheel' then it will hopefully be dealt with! Also if you then 'make' the council keep on top of it, it will probably happen less often. I believe it can also be reported to the police as one aspect of anti-social behaviour ...

moneyistooshorttomention

lessonlearned

Well my house certainly needs a daunting amount of money and effort spent on it just to get it up to "basic standard" (I am guessing that just the most important work would come to around £8,000). All the more daunting as I've spent so much effort on it over the years and certainly easily well into a 5 figure amount of money - just trying to put right some of the neglect and make it survivable by modern-day standards.

The thought of even more money and effort going on it and then only having it to "basic standard" - no eco stuff, not even done most of the replastering or sorted out the back yard/swopped back wall etc is daunting. It will never, with the best will in the world, be "right".

Anyway - further thought will be given and I shall finish the decluttering and springcleaning etc - it needs it anyway. The sooner I do it and "have some options" the better as you never know...there might be another one of those estate agent flyers through my door at some point with "We have a buyer looking in your area..." on it.

On another tack - had my first morning yesterday of not getting up with the alarm clock since retirement. Other mornings there was something or other I needed to be up by a certain time for and there is this morning. But I shall look forward soon to having some mornings of just lazily lying in bed if I want to and listening to rain/wind/etc and thinking "I don't have to go out in that if I don't want to:D". No more getting a bit sodden on the way to work and sitting there the "worse for wear" for hours:D

It still hasn't sunk in yet that the rest of my life is my own and no employer trying to regulate me/even keeping a "weather eye" on what we all do in our own darn leisure time any more etc:D. I've never exactly been a "conformist", so it's been very hard for me to have all their attempts (often not successful:rotfl:) to regulate me so.

Anyways...appointment coming up later for a leisure activity and then more decluttering.

lessonlearned

Don't be too daunted by your house - just take your time. Mine was in a shocking state. The wheelchairs, stairlift, bathing equipment etc did a lot of damage. Gouges to architraves, chunks out of plasterwork, scratches on my wooden floors. I just tackled it bit by bit.

£8000 is a lot of money. What jobs need to be done.

My main hobby is anything to do with art and design, repairing and refurbishing old furniture, painting and decorating, a bit of diy, gardening. You don't have to always throw money at the problem - just time and a bit of imagination. Have you looked at the shabby chic thread on the old style board. Some great makeovers on there.

I recently had a kitchen fire. I could have spent £4 or £5K on a new one. I did a revamp for £700 - just got a joiner to help with the bits I couldn't manage.

I can also recommend https://www.betterafter.blogspot.com It's American so some of the terminology is a bit different but again some great ideas.

I once had an estimate for new fencing £400. I went to Aldi and bought some hedging plants for £7 instead. Cheaper, prettier and better for the environment.

I think sometimes you just need to take your time and have a good think before splashing out a shed load of money.

There's also a diy thread on here and a gardening thread - plenty of good ideas and I'm happy to "advise":rotfl:.

What's wrong with the yard wall. Is it collapsing. If it's structurally safe but just a bit tatty can you just freshen it up with either a lick of paint or some judicious planting, some nice climbing shrubs. You can even grow herbs and vegetables in a vertical way. Google vertical gardens to get some ideas of how to turn a wall into a pretty and productive space.

Even the most unprepossessing yard can be turned into a little green oasis.

Sorry if I sound "preachy" but interior design is a bit of a passion with me. I just love rolling up my sleeves and getting stuck in. I find both diy and gardening very therapeutic - perfect for alleviating stress.

I definitely want my next property to be more "green". I am very keen to have an eco friendly home. I already use eco friendly paints and materials where possible. A woodburning stove is top of my list.

At the moment I have a nasty cold so am just lolling around, hence time to post on here, planning my next projects....

lessonlearned

moneyistooshorttomention wrote: »

lessonlearned

g. But I shall look forward soon to having some mornings of just lazily lying in bed if I want to and listening to rain/wind/etc and thinking "I don't have to go out in that if I don't want to:D". No more getting a bit sodden on the way to work and sitting there the "worse for wear" for hours:D

You get to wait until the streets have been "aired". :rotfl::rotfl:
No more de-icing the car.


It still hasn't sunk in yet that the rest of my life is my own and no
employer trying to regulate me/even keeping a "weather eye" on what we all do in our own darn leisur:rotfl::rotfl:e time any more etc:D. I've never exactly been a "conformist", so it's been very hard for me to have all their attempts (often not successful:rotfl:) to regulate me so.

My parents wouldn't let me make my own career choices - I was chanelled into secretarial work. I soon realised I was a square peg trying to fit into a round hole. Eventually I found my niche - working in and around the construction and property industries.

Conform - never!!! Dance to your own tune....

margaretclare

lessonlearned wrote: »

My parents wouldn't let me make my own career choices - I was channelled into secretarial work. I soon realised I was a square peg trying to fit into a round hole. Eventually I found my niche - working in and around the construction and property industries.

Conform - never!!! Dance to your own tune....

My sentiments exactly. I've resisted stereotyping throughout my entire life so far and am continuing to do so. Same with DH. He was telling me only yesterday how his parents used to give him a hard time, tell him he 'had his priorities wrong' when he didn't want to sit down to a long-drawn-out Friday night dinner with them, used to get washed and changed from work and down to the rowing club or the cycling club. I wish I'd known him then. I'd have gone and waved the club scarf, cheered him on.

Savvy_Sue

ll and money, you don't live anywhere near each other, do you? could be a creative 'partnership!' :rotfl:

There are various schemes for insulation etc through the energy companies, aren't there? I haven't investigated (for reasons which need not detain us now) but it could be worth checking.

moneyistooshorttomention

Done my morning leisure activity - a first of that type for me and must have got a bit of "relaxation" from it..as I'm now feeling really a bit "wierd" (no laughter in the back please:D) and "Am I really REALLY REALLY going to be actually ALLOWED to not have to go and earn a crust any more? Wow..."

The work my house really does have to have done and at not too distant a point in the future is some more neglect put right and some maintenance work.

NEGLECT TO PUT RIGHT:
- one room needs replastering VERY badly and it will be impossible to get off the wallpaper without doing so and the old plaster would only "glare" through any new wallpaper if I managed it (and I don't like wallpaper anyway - I expect to be able to just paint walls). With that done - I would be able to do the "maintenance" work on that room of redecorate and swop the worn carpet.

- kitchen floor is in a state (uneven "chipboard" type and suspect it needs replacing and some work to joists underneath it) and its impossible to do the maintenance work of swopping the kitchen/changing the position of the radiator until that's done

- There is a bit of damp wall in the sitting room underneath the woodchip wallpaper and I suspect the reason is down to the house never having had a damp-proof course put in

MAINTENANCE WORK
- I was the one who did all the upvc-ing on the house (windows/doors/gutters/fascia boards/downpipes). One of my windows needs "something" and I suspect it could mean having that one replaced again.

Trying to split the estimated costs down between "further putting right of neglect" and "maintenance work" would be problematic. I think I could get the new kitchen and moving of radiator that I need for about £3,500 and the neglect/bodge job side of kitchen (that floor) would be about £1,500.

This would be with me studiously ignoring the fact that there are 3 other rooms and the main area that need replastering and proceeding to neglect them myself.

The back yard wall - a right old hodge-podge of materials was used when it was done - the bricks in which are starting to crumble to pieces. Its not just a decor job - its "put right a bodge job job" by demolishing the whole thing and starting again. In other words - another job I shall proceed to neglect myself and just repaint it at intervals.

If I could "wave a magic wand" and the whole house got absolutely totally gutted from top to bottom (including the back yard) it still wouldnt be "right".

So - thank you very much indeed for thoughts/offers of design advice ll. That is very kind of you to do so - but the problems on this house go rather "deeper" than that. Hence my wondering whether to do "fresh start" in more ways than one:rotfl:

Off to some more "pleasure" now. I've been meaning to investigate a revamped/new owner coffee shop - so that will be my afternoon cup of coffee and maybes a bit of cake with it...and I'd better see about booking another celebratory meal out with friends (as it's my treat to them) in a new-to-us restaurant.

lessonlearned

Yes that is a lot of work and as you say it could be expensive.

Just an idea (I was for many years a New Build Sales Negotiator) I would suggest that before you do anything you get a couple of estate agents round to take a look.

Given the state of the housing market you might be better to sell your house as a "project". You may find that if you spend a lot of money, getting trades in etc that you might not get your money back. You might be better selling at a realistic price and saving your money for your next property. Especially if the finished result still doesn't give you the house you want anyway. I guess it all depends on how the figures stack up.

I was lucky because apart from the joinery costs I was able to do everything myself - mainly replastering, redecorating, etc so I've not really spent very much.

Well I had another viewing on my house today. Don't think they will go for it. Not too bothered though - I don't really fancy moving house in January or February:eek:

Enjoy your trip to the coffee shop.