Relate Counselling Service?

Bettyboop

Hi All,

I was meant to be seeing a Solicitor on Thursday with regards to the commencement of divorce proceedings.

My husband has asked if I would go to Relate with him and see how it goes first.

I have been to counselling on my own before but we have never been together. I have heard stories about Relate to the tune of "they don't actually help you stay together they help you to divorce easier" - That could be a load of rubbish but what experiences have others had with them? How much did it cost and did your relationship work out?

I hope you can help with this information.

Thanks!

Bettyboop

Anyone...Pretty Please : )

cooperbob

Ive been and if both parties are willing to let things happen and to both bend a bit towards each other then expect better things.
Im sure one way or another it does help at least to make all your gripes heard and dealt with.

beckyw_2

My husband and I looked at going to Relate but there was a waiting list. and it was expensive. A friend recommended marriagecare.org.uk - they are Catholic org but you don't have to be catholic. We saw someone straight away and made a contribution based on what we could afford> Highly recommend them.

Bettyboop

beckyw...we were on the waiting list one for marriage care. This was in April 2005. My husband at that time dropped out at the last minute so I ended up going alone. Now that things are at a head I have left this up to him so sort out as on two previous occassions he didn't turn up. I still have there telephone number I will ring them tomorrow to check on the waiting list....otherwise it's going to be Relate.

cooperbob

Relate is free they ask you for a donation if you can afford it

msmicawber

My ex and I went to Relate - I remember it being very expensive, but that was quite a few years ago now. The thrust of it was to get us communicating again, which unfortunately didn't happen, but I blame us not the Counsellor. Looking back, our relationship was dead in the water long before the counselling. I don't agree with what you've heard ("they don't actually help you stay together they help you to divorce easier"), but neither do I think they'll try and get you to flog a dead horse.

It can't do any harm and may well do some good, so I'd say go for it. Good luck.

Morglin

I've never heard of them actually doing much good to marriages that have run their course - it depends how much you want to save it.

Anyway, this might help, with info:

http://www.relate.org.uk/

Lin

lyns.m

Relate ask for a donation of £40 per session if you can. They also ask for £20 for any missed sessions. Me and my husband just spent about £400 with them. Didn't do us any good but you may be different. They aren't the cure for a broken relationship. My advice is buy some good self help books and always keep talking to eachother. Once that stops, all hope is gone. Good luck.

victory

I have been but it is the same as anything, you only get out what you put in in the first place. If either H or yourself are not totally commited to opening up the lines of communication again and to help each other through this difficult patch then ......

I had to contribute as the OP said and also agree with lots of free advice if you put it into google and self help books, free from the library, start yourself by writing loads, make lists of the positives of your H, the positives of staying together, the reasons you got together in the first place and take all the positives and try to make the negatives less of an issue...

Katmc2k

beckyw wrote: »

My husband and I looked at going to Relate but there was a waiting list. and it was expensive. A friend recommended marriagecare.org.uk - they are Catholic org but you don't have to be catholic. We saw someone straight away and made a contribution based on what we could afford> Highly recommend them.

Hi

I did some work for scottish marriage care (sister org) and can vouch that they are a fantastic org. It costs £35 to host each counselling session so those who can afford it are asked to donate. The average number of sessions is between four and eight.

The other posters have given good advice, good luck with your future.