What right does someone have...

custardy

floss2 wrote: »

AFAIAW the OP is not eating them all the time and has taken into account that they are "empty" calories

and as i said,thats fine
however empty calories are wasted calories
given they describe themselves as "doing a crazy workout program"
Then I assume their body needs a nutritious 200 calories to feed the body from that.
so wanting to eat them is fine,however trying to justify it is another matter.
I went to gym the other day and had a blueberry muffin for 'breakfast'
no point justifying it. its naughty and negates some of the gym work

OneYorkshireLass

Hughjass wrote: »

I'm small and so is dd and we get comments all the time, you should eat more, its not healthy to be underweight etc,

I've had the same problem. I get told to eat more cake or roast dinners - both of which I love and eat regularly. I've had health professionals make out I'm lying when I say I don't have an eating disorder and that I try to put on weight by eating high-calorie foods but it never stays on.

Shop assistants are sometimes rude when I ask if an item of clothing comes in a size 6 (and it usually doesn't!). They then usually direct me to the kid's department, which I wouldn't mind but most kid's clothes have cartoon characters or stupid slogans on them. I'm an adult FGS, what adult wants to walk around in a minnie mouse top? As for work style clothes, that's a nightmare in itself.


I also had a colleague who used to moan that she couldn't shift the pounds but would then tell us about her booze and take-away filled weekend. Lots of people are blissfully unaware that booze has tons of calories in it. She also drank huge amounts of Coke, then wonder why she was so bloated.

SandC

OP ignore them and rise above it, as I am sure you are going to do..... and good luck with the exercise and run. :T

BarneyRubble

If people commenting on your eating habits upsets you, then why have you posted on here, inviting more comments?

Sambucus_Nigra

People have the right to say what they want, you have the right to either ignore them, or respond appropriately.

heartbreak_star

BarneyRubble wrote: »

If people commenting on your eating habits upsets you, then why have you posted on here, inviting more comments?

I think I just needed a rant - it happens a lot on the parent board to this one!

Plus, it's always interesting to get opinions from people not connected to the situation

I've simmered down a bit today. Stuff them! I know what calories and nutrition are in most things, I budget with the help of MyPlate, and I budget in a little treat every day.

Booze is terrifying calorie-wise...thats part of the reason I'm always designated driver

HBS x

guineapig

The answer to a lot of these comments is, open your mouth and do a sharp intake of breath, as if you are going to say something, then pause, smile like you have just won the lottery, don't say a word then eat your pop tart/whatever, it will drive them nuts they will be "what?",what?!" it will drive 'em nuts!! They will soon stop with the comments

JimmyTheWig

heartbreak_star wrote: »

I've constantly had comments like "do you know how fattening they are?" "you'll get fat eating those" "I thought you were supposed to be on a diet" and even "you won't get any slimmer if you keep eating stuff like that".

LondonDreamer wrote: »

Based on these examples it sounds like they know you're on a diet. So they might think they're being helpful?

That's what I was going to say. It sounds to me like they are trying to help.
But then I always assume people are nice unless given reason to think otherwise. So I might be wrong!

Are these people generally nice, or do they often say things (not just about your eating) to try and wind you or other people up?

If they are generally nice people then I think it is safe to assume they are trying to be helpful. They will carry on trying to be helpful in this way until they understand that it is not helpful. The only way for them to understand this is for them to be told. The best place person to tell them is you. So next time it happens, I'd say something like "Thanks for your concern. My exercise regieme is going well. I'm starting to feel fitter and healthier. I've planned one treat, these pop tarts, into my daily allowance. I understand they're not the best thing I could be eating. Some people suggest I should have a banana. But if I cut out everything that I found nice I wouldn't cope with the diet and I'd be back to square one. I know you guys are trying to help me but these comments aren't helping. They actually make me feel worse - which makes me more likely to binge eat."
If you don't have the confidence to say it, or if everyone wouldn't hear it and you don't want to go through it lots of times, it might be easier to email everyone saying how you feel. Again, though, I would wait until the next time it happened and make it a response to that rather than do it out of the blue.

If, on the other hand, they are generally nasty people then the best thing you can do is ignore it. If they see you're not bothered by your comments then there's not much point in them commenting. They'll soon move on to the next thing they want to pick on someone about.
And I think, while it may be easier said than done, that you can ignore these comments in this case. People pick on others because they want to, not because there is anything particularly wrong with what the others are doing. It's the school playground mentality. Someone might get picked on because they have ginger hair, or a funny name, or different trainers to everyone else. There's nothing wrong with any of these things - and so nothing to get upset about - so they can (if possible) just be ignored.

murphydog999

I'm going to add my two-penny-worth in to the mix, as OP, from (client) experience, this is how I see it from your comments.

Is it the comments you don't like, or the fact that you are overweight/fat, and all people are seeing is an overweight/fat person eating stuff they shouldn't be?

If it is the comments, then the simplest thing is to not eat crap in front of them. If it is the latter then, as you say you are doing something about it, so inside you should be content with that, rise above the comments and laugh them off.

The comments may be due to people seeing you 'treating' yourself every day. If you have a lot of weight to loose, a 'treat' every day is counter-productive. Once a week would be more reasonable. Do you think you deserve a treat every day?

You may be budgeting for the 'treat' by calories but - as you mentioned the pop-tarts - they are empty calories from sugar, and they are the worst kind, so all you are doing is giving yourself a quick hi-lo sugar spike - which if you are trying cut down on sugar/excess carbs, will probably make you want to :mad: and you will just feel even hungrier.

This isn't a judgement; you are clearly aiming to get yourself back on track and well done, you will hopefully be able to prove all your 'commenters' wrong, but can I suggest you keep away from the cereal/biscuit aisle when you are shopping, and only have occasional 'treats,' and only when you have earned them.

heartbreak_star

Murphy - Oh, a treat isn't always 200 cals of carp, lol! Quite often it will be something like a bottle of Diet Coke instead of water or sugar-free jelly instead of yet another apple, which is no real calorific difference at all but because it's something I don't eat/drink all the time it feels good to have - and if I don't have something like this every day I do binge I don't think I explained myself so well! (Love your dog photo btw)

Jimmy - they're not really mean people, they just like having something/someone to complain about. They're not perfect themselves which is what annoys me - one of the main culprits has a 20-a-day smoking habit and another drinks wine every night...but nobody gets at them.

I'm trying to not let it get to me but it is sometimes hard - for example I brought in 4 batches of cupcakes for the Macmillan coffee morning tomorrow, and one girl went "ooh I bet you've eaten at least one from each batch, they're so fattening you know, you shouldn't eat them" so I made her stand there and count all 48 before sauntering off.

I have started making it clear that they should back off, with a gentle "Cheers for the comment, but I am capable of making my own choices, I do exercise, I'm not stupid, thanks". I do LOVE guineapig's style, wish I had the guts

HBS x