The 2 working parent family

Gracchus_Babeuf

embob74 wrote: »

I believe a lot of it has to do with expectations. Women expect to be able to go for pretty much any career they wish although I do believe men and women are definitely NOT equal after having children.
I remember having the careers advisor advising all the girls to be a secretary :eek: which I found very demeaning.

As it turns out I ended up being a secretary :rotfl:

What is so demeaning about being a secretary? PAs in the big blue chip companies and in the City can earn very good salaries.

wotsthat

Carl31 wrote: »

What baffles me is the amount of people, including my friends, that both work full time, and put their child into care, at say £1k a month out of their net salary, automatically wiping out any gain from full time work.

It was fairly simple in our case. The margin between childcare and wages was small but we needed that cash.

Plus if you don't work then there's no pay rises, bonuses, promotions etc.

Childcare is expensive but temporary.

Generali

Gracchus_Babeuf wrote: »

What is so demeaning about being a secretary? PAs in the big blue chip companies and in the City can earn very good salaries.

There's nothing demeaning about being a secretary but it is demeaning to assume that the only job a woman can do is being a secretary.

Carl31

wotsthat wrote: »

It was fairly simple in our case. The margin between childcare and wages was small but we needed that cash.

Plus if you don't work then there's no pay rises, bonuses, promotions etc.

Childcare is expensive but temporary.

im not criticising, and each to their own, but would it not be better to work part time and look after your child during the day instead of someone else doing it? surely the marginal difference, if it is marginal, could be covered by a part time wage? then go back to full time when the child is at school/older

Thats part of my original query really

Generali

Carl31 wrote: »

im not criticising, and each to their own, but would it not be better to work part time and look after your child during the day instead of someone else doing it? surely the marginal difference, if it is marginal, could be covered by a part time wage? then go back to full time when the child is at school/older

Thats part of my original query really

I think the bit you miss there is this:

Plus if you don't work then there's no pay rises, bonuses, promotions etc.

If you get off the career ladder for a while then you leave yourself at a huge disadvantage. It shouldn't be that but it is and any woman that doesn't realise that is unlikely to prosper in the corporate workplace.

Loughton_Monkey

Generali wrote: »

There's nothing demeaning about being a secretary but it is demeaning to assume that the only job a woman can do is being a secretary.

Absolutely.

They make excellent nurses, and supermarket checkout operators as well.

Mrs LM keeps on about how wives who stay at home and cook, clean, iron etc. should be formally paid for this valuable work.

But I've never paid her. I've told her that if I had to pay for all this, I'd pay a man and have it done properly.

chewmylegoff

Generali wrote: »

If you get off the career ladder for a while then you leave yourself at a huge disadvantage. It shouldn't be that but it is

why shouldn't it be like that?

if i took 4 years off work, and then tried to get back into it, it would be quite tricky as everything i knew would be out of date (and i would have probably forgotten about it all as well as if i had 4 years off i would spend most of it drinking and probably be too fat to get through the door to attend the interview anyway).

Graham_Devon

Loughton_Monkey wrote: »

Is that possible?

You tell me, you're one of those consistently trying to do so whenever an opportunity arises

Loughton_Monkey

Graham_Devon wrote: »

You tell me, you're one of those consistently trying to do so whenever an opportunity arises

I'm nothing if not trying.:wall:

DevilsAdvocate1

Generali wrote: »

I think the bit you miss there is this:

If you get off the career ladder for a while then you leave yourself at a huge disadvantage. It shouldn't be that but it is and any woman that doesn't realise that is unlikely to prosper in the corporate workplace.

I left my career when my second child was a baby and have never regretted it. I've seen many friends continue, some full time but most part time. And their reason for doing this was as you state, to have a career once the children started school.

The children are all getting older now and we are in our forties. Over the last few years, many of them have been made redudant. Most of them have found it difficult to get a similar role and have either had to change careers totally or have had to take a backward step. Two of them have not found another role.

So while you hope it keeps your career going, this may not actually happen. Personally, I would have regretted the sacrifice of losing that time with my children when they were small if I ended up being made redundant later anyway.