Help with childcare for carer of elderly parent? Complicated!

mazza1985

Hi all

My cousin has a learning difficulty and is currently 36 weeks pregnant. However social services have decided that she is not capable of parenting. Her mother (my aunt) is going to be applying for a residency order with support from child protection next week. My cousin will not be allowed unsupervised contact with the child but will liv with my aunt so she can be involved as much as possible.

My aunt is the main carer for her mother, my nan, and receives carers allowance for this.

We need to draw up a care plan for the child protection case conference which is taking place on 30th August. One of the difficulties we are facing is finding someone to look after the child during the day Monday to Wednesday. I live 150 miles away, my cousins sister works Monday to Wednesday, my mother who lives near by works until 14:30 Monday and Tuesday and starts work at 13:30 on wednesday. There is no-one else that can care for my nan, she refused home help and that is why my aunt cares for her. We cannot leave the baby with the mother unsupervised. As the baby gets older it will need more attention and realistically my aunt will not be able to care for her grandchild and her mother simultaneously. If a solution is not foun the baby will be taken into care at birth.

Is there any help my aunt can get for childcare costs, she would need about 8 hours a week for this to work.

enabledebra

I can't think of any benefit related help with this - it sounds like something social services would need to look at covering- but as I assume that this has been asked about and refused?
Try this helpline I'm sure they will know who can advise you if it's not their area:
http://www.childrenslegalcentre.com/

skintandscared_2

Any possibility that there is a father still on the scene who can help, or his family can?

mazza1985

skintandscared wrote: »

Any possibility that there is a father still on the scene who can help, or his family can?

The father is not allowed unsupervised contact. His family are unwilling to get involved - they are hacked off that we are applying for residency and that we have blocked him from seeing child alone. The father is violent and abusive which is part of the reason social services have called a child protection case conference.

pmlindyloo

You do not say how old your cousin is or if she receives any benefits.

I would have thought that she should be getting some financial help in her own right.

When the baby is born there will be Child Benefit which if the grandmother has a residency order she would probably be eligible for.

It seems to me that it may be better to look at this the other way round. Instead of your aunt looking after her mother she will need to look after the baby and make alternative arrangements for the grandmother. Only my opinion.

It all sounds very complicated and if social services are involved then they really should be the ones who advise on all this.

mummyroysof3

can the baby and babys mother go with her to care for the relative..that way relative gets cared for but baby not left alone with its mum..or did i misunderstand?

Dunroamin

I mean this suggestion in a kindly way but I do wonder whether your cousin and her family have considered the idea of adoption?

mazza1985

mummyroysof3 wrote: »

can the baby and babys mother go with her to care for the relative..that way relative gets cared for but baby not left alone with its mum..or did i misunderstand?

The mother would need to be supervised, something the babys grandmother could not do if she is providing personal care to her mum (babys great grandmum).

mazza1985

Dunroamin wrote: »

I mean this suggestion in a kindly way but I do wonder whether your cousin and her family have considered the idea of adoption?

It takes many years for a child to be adopted, they get moved around between foster parents and care homes, and the outcomes for the child are very poor. I would take the child on before it came to that point, but I live 150 miles away and that means the childs mother would not be able to be involved if she wanted to be, and we are trying to give her that chance. I do understand the reasons why you have suggested this though as this is obviously going to be difficult to manage for everyone. However as a family we have decided we want to do everything possible to prevent the child from going into care.

mazza1985

pmlindyloo wrote: »

You do not say how old your cousin is or if she receives any benefits.

I would have thought that she should be getting some financial help in her own right.

When the baby is born there will be Child Benefit which if the grandmother has a residency order she would probably be eligible for.

It seems to me that it may be better to look at this the other way round. Instead of your aunt looking after her mother she will need to look after the baby and make alternative arrangements for the grandmother. Only my opinion.

It all sounds very complicated and if social services are involved then they really should be the ones who advise on all this.

My cousin is 21 and is normally on JSA as she does not meet the threshold for ESA, she is on income support at present due to pregnancy. We do not have anyone else to care for my grandma - she has refused professional help hence my aunt giving up her job to care for her. My aunt will claim the child benefit and child tax credits for the child providing she is issued the residency order.

pmlindyloo

Does your aunt claim Carer's Allowance?

Sorry, I see she does.