Trying for a Baby Part 8

clearing_out_my_pockets

atton83 wrote: »

I see my failing at life and i start to bring myself down thinking that i am a failure as i don't have a kid and i am trying to get one but not getting there so then i start to blame myself and generally belittle myself so not only do i bring myself down but i bring the oh down as well

I also feel like i ask the same stupid questions every month and i hate the fact i don't remember what i have and haven't asked even when i scroll back and read my posts so that's why i stay away at the moment as i feel i am not worthy of your help

First point - I seem to recall that you mentioned that your OH had something happen to his 'delicate areas' when he was younger. This is more likely to be the cause of your problem. You should not be blaming yourself. At all.

Second point. No one is not worthy of help on this thread. It is clear from your posts that you really want to be a mother - as do we all. How can you say that you don't belong here?

becca0417

abis21 wrote: »

Oh my gosh ladies - what am I doing?!?! Its CD1 (or very near)and I am faffing about with an apple and an orange. Clearly I need chocolate!!!! :rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

Have you not heard of chocolate orange :rotfl::rotfl:

atton83

Clearing out my pockets - I know that my mind is playing tricks and we will be going for a SA when were not so stressed or busy but i know that might be a cause and i need to stop thinking these things i just feel i am asking too much all the time and i know its silly to think this it just happens in those few hrs when you have no clarity

thank you for your kind words

atton83

becca0417 wrote: »

Have you not heard of chocolate orange :rotfl::rotfl:

omg this made me chuckle lol even through my groggy state lol :money: :T

abis21

Yayyyy, kitten pie has had her little girl :j:j:j Have been stalking the pregnancy boards to wait for the announement

atton83

This last week i have been babysitting my god daughter and her brother so i have been getting up at 6am to go collect them at 8am and i have been doing my opks i still have a - but its getting closer so i think tomorrow will be my +

i think but don't quote me i have got my wedding cake sorted £190 for three tiers, top tear will be vanilla with black cherry in the middle ok for celiacs and lactose intolerant people. middle tear will be 8" lemon with lemon curd in the middle and then the bottom tear will be chocolate with a chocolate ganache om nom nom nom

i am still having trouble with student finance but its getting there slowly
and last night was a culmination of stress from uni, trying to sort out student finance and the fact i have gotten it into my head i wont fit into my dress as i dont have time to do my workout at the mo grrrrrrrrr

atton83

congrats lemon

lilymay1

abis21 wrote: »

Yayyyy, kitten pie has had her little girl :j:j:j Have been stalking the pregnancy boards to wait for the announement

:T:T:T:T:T:T:T:T:T:T:T:T:T:T:T:T:T

Best thing I've read all day. Brilliant news. I feel a bit emotional even thinking about it as I know only too well how she will be feeling right now.

Kitten, if you read this, I am SO happy for you.

amyloofoo

atton83 wrote: »

Hi ladies

I have been lurking the past few weeks, i come on lately and read as i have been going through my own turmoil some of it has been really stupid but i have had to go through it and no one can help me as most of my turmoils are created by my body with my damn seizures.

Hi Atton, I'm glad you've come back. It hasn't been the same without you. I think sometimes if you're lurking it makes you feel worse as you feel excluded and reading what everyone else is going through raises questions which you then don't feel able to ask. Maybe continuing to post would help you to feel a little better?

Sometimes the way you talk about your body and your seizures is really upsetting. You don't choose to have these seizures or the feelings associated with them, and there's no reason for you to continue to blame yourself. I'll understand if you don't want to discuss it on this thread, but are you taking any medication for your seizures and did you let your doctor know you're TTC as there are obviously interactions with many of them and it could be a possible reason why you're struggling at the moment.

Bear with me please as last night i apparantly had a lot of seizures, today i am v groggy and tired and i don't want to sleep all day as it will mean my early morning regime that i am getting into for uni will be scuppered and i don't have long to go till i start.

I really hope this uni course is a positive move for you and helps to keep you feeling a little brighter and more generally motivated. I'm sorry, I don't mean to come across as patronising - I just know that with my condition getting into a working / studying routine has really helped and I think we share a lot of the same issues really.

I love seeing peoples bfp but it also hurts to know that i am still stuck here with no kids and then the rose tinted glasses come out and i feel like i am never going to get there. does that make sense to anyone or just me?

I think everyone feels a bit like that hun, as hard as it is you just have to remember that them getting their good news doesn't mean you won't get yours. There are plenty of BFPs to go around!

I see my failing at life and i start to bring myself down thinking that i am a failure as i don't have a kid and i am trying to get one but not getting there so then i start to blame myself and generally belittle myself so not only do i bring myself down but i bring the oh down as well

I also call myself a failure as my family hate me and i blame myself for my abuse i lived with as a child telling myself i asked for it

Have you ever had any counselling or a talking therapy like CBT? http://www.nhs.uk/Livewell/counselling/Pages/Accesstotherapy.aspx I think they could be really helpful in allowing you to come to terms with your past and helping you to move on. Your family's failings are not your own, and you need to try to get past what's happened when you were younger and only focus on the things you can change today - I know this is easier said than done.


The newest one right now is because i am starting uni i see myself failing before i even start and that the best thing for me to do would be to just quit the course before even trying to see if i can do it

Have you been given a personal tutor yet? It might be worth seeing if you can have a 1:1. Coventry Uni have a pretty good pastoral care team, and tend to be good at looking after concerned and nervous students.

I also feel like i ask the same stupid questions every month and i hate the fact i don't remember what i have and haven't asked even when i scroll back and read my posts so that's why i stay away at the moment as i feel i am not worthy of your help

We all ask daft / gross / possibly inappropriate questions and you're by no means the only (or probably worst) one! :rotfl:Do you not remember the semen / EWCM discussion of a few weeks ago! And I know for a fact that I've asked some howlers :eek: We're all on here because we have questions or need help and support in some way or other, and no-one's any more or less worthy than anyone else.

i have been doing even stuppider stuff like asking a magic 8 ball if i am ever going to get pregnant and i get the outlook looks bleak, my goddaughters brother has a lie detector on his tablet so i said i am never going to be a mom and it came back truth

I'm not going to pretend I haven't done equally daft things, but you know how silly this is. Take a deep breath, throw the magic 8 ball away and work on improving the aspects of your life you can control: i.e. uni, possibly getting some counselling, wedding plans and trying to get as healthy as possible - whether that's in preparation for a baby or just so you can enjoy life more.

so you see why i went into hiding

I know you've been having a really tough time hun, and I think we can all sympathise; but you need to stop being so negative about yourself

Birdie85

Absolutely fantastic news about Kitten! :j Can't quite believe that I've been here long enough to see old graduates having babies though! :eek: I don't really look at the pregnancy threads because, well, it's obvious Hope someone lets me know when Ikkle and SexyMouse have their babies too though!