Eastenders - Stella and Ben

MABLE

Been home today and watched last nights episode on Teleport replay and found the situation with Ben very upsetting. OK I know it is fiction but this sort of thing does go on. When the director shouts "wrap" the actors can return to their normal lifes. However there are children like the character of Ben whose normal life is being abused.

funky-footprints

last time i watched eastenders Ben was a right little git, (back when courtney was in it with grant)so it sounds as if he is getting what he deserved. may have to watch it now to watch evil mumma in action!!

Sarahjovi

I hope they don't drag it out for too long though!

I don't like any programme that has bullying or this type of story line. (I hated the Claire/Max storyline on hollyoaks too!)

I know the worlds not the lovey dovey place I'd like it to be, but I'm a sucker for a nice romantic story and a happy ending.

Sarah:D

Carmina_Piranha_3

does eastenders do happy endings?

parsnips

i find eastenders very upsetting to watch at the moment

i went to bed really sad about it and said to my hubby i dont think i can bear to watch it, i hope phil finds out sooner rather than later, i cant cope.

tinkerbell1978

is this the story line that made dot and jim quit eastenders i guess so, makes me squirm its awful to think someone could treat a child like that!

Kimberley

tinkerbell1978 wrote: »

is this the story line that made dot and jim quit eastenders i guess so, makes me squirm its awful to think someone could treat a child like that!

I think it was due to them adopting a child from abroad as a storyline

kelloggs36

It is very plausible - my daughter was suffering like this from her step mother and told her dad, but he wouldn't believe her. Hence, she chose not to go there anymore and now her dad won't even make contact with her!!! Sad that it goes on - I hope my ex's wife is watching and is recognising herself!!

Peakma

I hadn't realised/noticed Dot and Jim had gone! What happened there?

purpleprincess

hes a little git so who cares

Remember he was nasty to Stella first, she did try and be nice

Ben was a right little git

...so it sounds as if he is getting what he deserved

I know this is a fictional storyline but is this really the message we want to be giving out?

They may be intended as flippant remarks but not everyone reading these threads are decent as you think yourselves to be.

It is well documented that most abusers will find a way of blaming the child for their own abusive behaviour to evade accountability.

An abuser, when caught, will often use counter-attack and feign victimhood to make people believe that the child is responsible, or has behaved in such a way to justify their actions and the harm done.

Could be anything - a cheeky, insolent 10yr old or a baby that cries (usually held up as mitigating circumstances in court even with proof of systematic abuse!)

Remember that we are able to watch the trauma that Ben is experiencing, if this were true to life what behaviour/interactions would we witness? what opinions would we form?

I suppose he was horrible to Stella at first.

the bits i saw she was being really nice to ben and he was smiling!! and it was ben who was "bullying" stella!!!

Ben doesn't sound the most likeable of children but does he really deserve to suffer as in the story? does anyone?

The flavour of some posts seems to be that, if not totally deserving, Bens' character makes Stellas' behaviour at least understandable. From what I've seen, her actions are not an isolated event of her 'losing it' after dealing with a childs' extreme behaviour but more calculating and cruel. Surely that's never understandable or deserved.

even if it saves one child from abuse in real life. They have dealt with this issue with the help of NSPCC and Childline. Eastenders are very brave in doing this and it will help people to see the danger signs.

I can't stand Ben but it is strange seeing the abuse being different to the normal violent type. She is coming across so nice, which is rather intriguing but scary.

What is normal ?

Unfortunately most abusers do come across as nice, charming, etc. I guess that's how they get away with it...you would be reluctant to leave your child with someone you wouldn't trust with a dog wouldn't you?!

Well done Eastenders for raising not only the issue of child abuse but to cause us to question our own attitudes when the abuser seems so 'nice' and the victim is not seen as some poor defenseless young child but a 10yr old boy that appears to be a difficult little s*d who has behaved appallingly!


I hope I've not gone mad with all these quotes (never done it before so hoping they work too) but these are what jumped out when reading the thread. I mean no offence to anyone quoted, nor do I assume these are your personal opinions. It is after all a thread about a storyline in a soap but with a very serious subject.

If this story was true, we would not have witnessed any of the abuse but may have formed these opinions on the child and his relationship with his abuser from the contact we'd had with them and the interactions we HAD witnessed. Just a thought

It is very plausible - my daughter was suffering like this from her step mother and told her dad, but he wouldn't believe her.

(kelloggs, I hope you don't mind me using this - I can remove it if you prefer)


:A :A :A