Flying solo

chevalier

Hi robin
Hope you haven't been blown away!

Sorry again if I was a bit hard about the money.
chev

Skint_but_Optimistic

Hi Robin, so pleased you are ok - you have found so much pleasure in making the flower bed I hope it doesnt let you down!

I can tell how much you want to save your children from worry and stress, its so hard to sit back, and I myself have paid for a plumber for example to fix DDs bath, when I needed some electrical work done myself. I would worry about her more than my situation.

I hope you get your tv back soon.

Sun_Addict

Hello Robin - just dropping by to see what's happening at the nest today. Hope everything is ok in your world today! It's only natural to want to look after your offspring no matter how old they are! You don't like to think of them struggling - I'm just the same.

missrlr

Hi RoBin

How's life in "the nest?"

We miss you

Xx

grannyx2

Dear Robin I really hope you are ok as you've been AWOL, ok maybe MIA then for a while now. Perhaps CD could drop in to let us know how you are.

Lots of love

Granny x

please-let-me-be-lucky

Hope you are ok Xx

*Robin*

Hello Diary and Dearest Friends-in-the-Box, :hello:

Thank you everyone for your kind thoughts, and nudging me to keep posting - much appreciated. :T

I have been in a dark place. Memories, current RL events and my financial shortcomings set the Black Dog snapping inside. Ironically it took a real dog to chase away the beast.

It's time to confess, so here is the £££ list:
1. Still not called THEM.
1b. Paid THEIR bill out of 5% interest a/c [because the card was to hand] - still haven't moved funds out of the hilarious savings a/c which only pays about 0.025%!
2. Haven't yet ploughed through Ombudsman's lengthy PPI forms.
3. This year's ISA has disappeared from FD accounts page. Tried to call 'em, was put on hold and gave up waiting after 31 minutes (curseword musac was sooo annoying!).
4. Letting down DS4. Quite honestly, am terrified at the thought of taking on another mortgage without DH's guiding hand on the family finances.
5. Tenant One's rent is under 2/3 the current rate for type and location of flat, and hasn't changed since the tenancy began (two and a half years ago). So wrote proposing an increase of 10% - making it roughly 3/4 average rental value - but learned too late the request wasn't quite correctly phrased (thanks for info, G_M).
6. Legal paperwork; property registration, PoA, and Will still need updating. Plus Spanish THEM are bound to present a bill at some point.

Sometime during the depressive fog Divo Two came to visit, bringing mixed news; good bit was he repaid the car-fixing funds (fair play to him - didn't expect that! :T).
Worrying part is that DS2 is about to join GF, she's rented them a flat (which will take his entire wage packet to pay for). She will buy groceries, cover utilities and provide spends - this is how they arrange their finances but he couldn't tell me how much their total income is. :cool:
No pets allowed, so DS2 has been left with the job of re-homing GF's five cats.
Worst of all, from next week DS will only see DGD for holidays (her Mum quite rightly forbade the child from travelling alone on long-distance public transport).
They intend to leave most of their things in DH's cottage because: A) the flat is furnished, and in case it doesn't work out and they [or he] decide to come back. Most of the furniture is hers. When they moved it all in, DH's [tattier] duplicate items were dumped on the patio - where most of it still remains because they haven't honoured their promise to take it to the dump (I took one load, but the rest is too big for my van).

Oh dear. Divo Four reckoned I ought to have seen it coming. Wish I had - or not been labouring beneath Black Dog's sombre bulk when DS2 turned up - because without thinking, I committed the Parental Cardinal Sin: Thou shalt not criticise thy offspring's love-object.
Not heard from DS2 since.

Every time I think about any of the above, a need to go and do whatever is the current garden task becomes overpowering.
So have - very slowly and with many breaks - planted, weeded, fertilised, shredded, rebuilt crumbling sections of wall [badly], and debugged the poor liddle mandarin tree - until everything hurts and I have an excuse to fall over, by which time coherent thought is impossible.

Meanwhile used up my 'super-fast broadband' allocation half way through the month through listening to the radio and trying to watch a couple of tv programmes. The limit was upped by 1Gb for an extra tenner on the bill; it lasted less than four days - so that's that - 'net access could easily exceed £100pcm if I top it up at those rates! Therefore until next month can't stream video, radio is intermittent, and it takes an age to load each page.
Am learning to watch brain-in-neutral evening TV [in English] via several hitherto unnoticed channels, way down the list of what is still available. Pick of the bunch must be the Kiwi version of Shameless - am quite enjoying that as it's much better written than the UK soaps - but usually fall asleep half way through.

Yesterday, had a nasty moment while walking round to collect some firewood out of the van. CD wouldn't come with me; just sat on her lookout, whining.. At the gate I found out why: Nice Neighbour's mad Alsation hurtled round the corner and lunged at me - never had to use a wheelbarrow as a defensive weapon before! :cool:
NiceN's daughter was walking him without a lead again - she just yelled at her dog and ran off along the road to avoid my wrath - luckily he abandoned his attack and followed.
Poor dog; brain-damaged after contracting parvo as a puppy. He goes for everyone [two and four-legged] who isn't part of his family, so it's not very responsible to walk him off-lead. The girl can't really control him anyway, so I count us both very fortunate indeed that CD spotted the approach of this menace and refused to go within range of his teeth - he's twice her weight so could do significant damage.
..Bet he's a dog with a headache today - it was sheer instinct to up-end the barrow so he crashed into that rather than my chest! :eek:
Took a while before I stopped shaking; went back up to the Nest for a restorative cuppa, and finally opened my eyes: Saw the piled-up dirty dishes and mucky floor, unopened post littering the table, carpet covered in fur where CD - who's shedding - stretches out to sleep..
Realised I'd eaten all frozen 'instant' meals in stock, and the fresh stuff in the fridge was going beyond use-by date.
No idea how long it has been since I've taken m' various pills and supplements properly, changed the bed or washed my hair (not enough hot water to do the latter while showering).

Sorting out the Nest has put the ol' internal time-clock well out of synch; slept early then woke up in the wee hours to finish off - even washed out the hoover cylinder and de-scaled the kettle.

I]Later[/I.
Reasons to be cheerful:
*Thought hungry birds [and/or bugs?] ate all the first batch of potato plants before rain brought on tastier alternatives for 'em, so was delighted to discover about 5kg of delicious new spuds when clearing ground for the next crop.
*The lillies planted out recently are putting up flower stems.
*Strawberries coming on nicely - thank you bees! - ate six truly delicious ruby examples yesterday.
*DIL1 delivered a barrel of cold-pressed virgin oil - from our own olives harvested by DS4; after filtering, I've got 9lts of liquid gold!
*T1 has accepted badly-worded rent rise request cheerfully (phew!). :T
*DS4's non-studying hours are filling up with paid work (reducing subsidies required). :T

Food for thought:
T1 wants to buy DH's flat. Hmmm. :think:
Might affect item no:4 on finances list above?

This is a ridiculously long post, but still have a bit of catching up to do:

Chev, please don't think your comments were not well received. Valentine's Day holds many difficult memories for me and always will; not to worry, that's Life. :A
The student loan trap: What better way to ensure a docile graduate work force than to saddle 'em with £££££ debt from the start of their careers? Don't like the way the rules can be changed, either - personally would prefer it if Divo Four can minimise reliance on the system as much as possible (he does have a loan for tuition fees this year - but thanks to an enviable physique he's earning a good wage from easy part-time work; sitting still ).

Chev: Take your point where DS2 is concerned; am worried that in his easy-going way, he's losing direction - but when it comes down to it, he'll live his own life whatever my opinion - may already have overstepped the parent + adult child relationship (foolish woman that I am ).

Chev, Missrlr, SbO and Sun.A - yes of course it's natural to want the best possible for our children, we all share that. But you're right; need to recognise the limit of what I can or should do for my Divos, and not go beyond it.

Missrlr - do hope your environs are drying out at last - growing webbed toes would be very inconvenient!

Missrlr and SbO; doesn't seem to be a legal solution to TV channel loss here. There are a couple of expensive, possibly short-term, not-quite kosher possibilities - but have decided many other projects represent more worthy use of funds (one-off upcoming expenses; automatic irrigation system and bill for restoration of heirloom).

Satchmo what an interesting avocado recipe; thank you, will give it a try - still very windy here so plenty are being blown down.

Granny I asked CD whether she'd like to post this update, but she just rolled over for a tummy-tickle. :happyhear

Lucky, DFw, HAW and everyone, thanks for popping in; you have no idea how much your support means, especially as you all have your own difficulties to bear. :heartpuls

Well, it's light now. Another big storm is approaching but it looks like I've got a couple of hours before rain hits, so heading outside to plant out the last few year-old almond trees which have been growing in pots, then they'll get the benefit of an extra free soaking as they bed in (very MSE ).

grannyx2

I am so pleased to know you are ok but so sorry that you have been suffering. I'm sure DS2 will get over his hump and come to realise that it is because you care ((((Robin)))) in the meantime

Tummy tickles to CD, I'm glad she had the sense to stay away from Alsatian. The wheel barrow story made me smile, after I'd got over the thought of how nasty an incident both you and CD avoided

Take care of you my dear

Granny x

Knit_Witch

Sorry to hear you have been in a pit (I think I have been there with you!), hopefully things will get better soon

satchmo1

Phew, was really worried that something awful had happened to either Robin or CD or one of the offspring. Thank God you are ok, although it must have been very hard whilst the Black Dog had such a grip on you.


Thank God also that you had a wheelbarrow to use as a shield against the crazed Alsatian. Can't the girl be reported for not being in control of the dog? I know it's hard to report people, but it'd be better than having a tragedy happen.


Could one of the Divos speak to DS2 about clearing furniture from patio? Is a bonfire possible, as nothing will be worth keeping by now? Surely it'd be better to rent the place out to help with living costs?


So much more to comment on, but I don't want to sound haranguing, as I'm fully on your side. Except to ask you to re-stock your freezer and cupboards, as good nutrition is essential to wellbeing.


Hugs, Satchmo xx


PS I'm skiving off from packing at the moment. Only two weeks til our house sale goes through. We're still waiting to hear when our purchase will happen... homelessness beckons (actually, b&b or staying with mumsie, or best idea to my mind, clearing off to France for a month's holiday).