Flying solo

*Robin*

Hello Diary and Dear MSE Friends, :hello:

So many visitors while I've been away feeling [STRIKE]sad[/STRIKE] sorry for myself - am humbled by your care when you have plenty going on in your own lives..
Thank you all for thinking of me - Lucky, Greying, Piq, Granny, HAW, Satchmo, DFW, Fudgie and Chev. :A


So. Had decided to cancel my birthday because there is nothing to celebrate this year, then on the morning itself a 'phone-call from DS2 to DS4 [not to me!] threw everything into a frenzy. The call was to announce that DS2, GF and DGD would be joining us for dinner! :eek:

Cue an immediate panicked trip to town for supplies because fridge/freezer is still struggling, so no longer contained enough compatible ingredients for a decent meal (six single portions of different food; yes. But am finally getting the hang of buying for one person, and have been using up stocks in case the freezer does actually give up).

<Hangs head in shame.>
Spent a ridiculous amount of money; as well as a "quarter pack" [of lamb] and the rest of the food and drink, we came home with a new shower tap, bathroom scales, a mango tree, and the most expensive sack of special-diet dog-food I've ever bought (FD has become allergic to wheat and wasn't doing too well on rice alone). Plus three months' worth of meds for FD to go with it, another supply of mine and a new prescription from El Medico sent the spends total up to £300! :eek:

Normally, I wouldn't dare to try and host a gathering on the same day as going shopping. This time there was no choice; plenty to do with cooking dinner, watering the garden, entertaining visitors and rearranging furniture so that we could eat outside.

On the plus side; was so busy that I had no opportunity to think or brood about what to say to GF.

As it was my birthday, I said nothing at all which might have provoked dissent, or upset DGD.
It was quite surreal; nobody watching would have had any idea of GF's recent actions. She was absolutely fine; happy and obviously enjoying learning about English cuisine (as an accomplished chef, she was fascinated by the process of making gravy - a sauce that is unknown in Andalucian cooking).
She and DS2 are indeed pretending nothing happened.
I watched DGD closely for signs of unease, but saw none.

There was one small incident though; while DGD was helping me by wiping down the table, she jokingly sprayed GF with the cleaning-gloop.
Now DGD knows this is a bleach mix. During previous visits I've warned her about it; shown her the marks on some of my own clothes where I've been careless.
Did she forget? Or was this a little dig? I didn't see it happen; nothing was said until hours later when GF noticed an interesting pattern appear on her trousers.. Oops.

The meal was very well received. Overall I had a much better day than expected - even got some unexpected presents which was a lovely surprise.

But by the time we bid our visitors farewell, I was so tired that I lurched into a metal door (bruising my face - luckily wasn't wearing glasses). Since then the days have been a blur.

Fridge-mending-Friend turned up at one point; spotted the new shower tap and fitted it for me. That 'gift' has done much to aid recovery - feel so much better when fresh and clean!

:think:

Dear Friends, it's taken me a couple of days to write this post. Would like to reply to several of your comments but there is a financial matter which needs urgent attention (just realised today is Friday): A bond containing the bulk of PC's savings has matured, but the funds have not appeared where they should have done. It's time to dig out appropriate paperwork and 'phone the bank.
Deep joy - will be pleasantly surprised if it takes less than an hour being passed around at least four departments. :cool:


Hopefully will be back later.

please-let-me-be-lucky

Happy belated birthday Robin.

A very mixed emotions post, hope you are doing ok. Good idea to chase the funds today ahead of the bank holiday weekend Xx

HeadAboveWater

Great to hear from you again Robin.

Rather a lot been going on, but glad the day turned out well in the end

Please take care of yourself

debtfreewannabe321

I'm so glad your birthday turned out better than you'd hoped I surprised my mum this year on her birthday and she was so happy, she'd not expected any visitors or presents either. I came bearing dinner as well as gifts though so no rush for her to run to town

I hope you manage to get some joy from ringing the bank and that it took less than an hour xx

missrlr

Hi Robin
So happy you are back with us
Not really to sure what to say about GF other than hummmmm
I suspect you are going to have to speak to DS2 and then the both
Hope you feeling better now after the door incident?
Do hope the bank went ok
Well done on the birthday sounds lovely
Hugs x x

Sun_Addict

Happy belated Birthday Robin! My birthday today so we are both August ladies. All the best people are born in August of course!

please-let-me-be-lucky

Sun_Addict wrote: »

Happy belated Birthday Robin! My birthday today so we are both August ladies. All the best people are born in August of course!

Totally!!

Mind you, the ones who were fashionably late and rocked up in September aren't bad either Xx

Fudgefund

A belated Happy Birthday to you! :beer:Have a nice cream soda. I had it in mind when I came on here to ask Clever Dog for a desolate woof, but you've appeared. Glad you had a good day, the metal door sounds horrible though! Hope you're very much on the mend. xx

grannyx2

Happy belated birthday, glad the day went well

hope call to bank sorted this blip without hassle and quickly

hmph to GF, sounds like maybe wasn't so keen on hols with DGD if you ask me.

Hope door episode hasn't caused any lasting problems

granny x

*Robin*

Hello Diary and MSE Friends, :hello:

Thank you everyone for my birthday wishes.

You all put me to shame, you really do.
I've had a half-written post on m'pc all weekend, but not been able to finish it because I keep falling asleep, and cannot concentrate much when awake.
The knock-on effect is that I'm not taking the correct doses of El Medico's meds, so feet are swelling and painful again.
Solution? Have armed a pair of alarm clocks; when they go off - waking me if necessary - I take a pill and reset them. Will see how that goes.

Lucky, many thanks for your timely reminder about Bank Holiday Monday! I'd forgotten, but managed to get through to PC's bank before close of business:
Had a bit of trouble with skype; by the time I'd realised the speakers were muted and turned them up, I had already missed most of the extension choices - so just pressed "1" then told the chap who answered that my enquiry was about my late hubby's savings bond. Ok, I had the a/c number - but wasn't asked any security questions at all! :eek:
The call took 50 minutes. Was glad I had my notes and their letters in front of me because that bank's filing system is atrocious - the bloke started off by telling me I had to get Probate!
Eventually he found all the information I've already given them.. End result is that the funds are in bank-limbo; might not appear in the right place before the end of next week.

Ok. Gives me breathing space to decide: A) How long to tie up this fund, and Where to put it.
A) is the conundrum. Once that's been decided, some time perusing Martin's wisdom on the main site is in order.
:think:

Ever since their visit on my birthday, I've been thinking about Divo Two and his GF:

HeadAboveWater wrote:

I think important too that she goes to get help herself. The fact she can't remember why...??? That's worrying

missrlr wrote:

she cannot simply ignore this! How on earth will DGD cope especially if this happens when she is more aware or fewer people immediately to assist .....

Fudgefund wrote:

I don't believe for a second DS2's GF doesn't know why she attempted to take her own life, especially if she has done it before. Lengthy talking is required there if their relationship is to move forward.

chevalier wrote:

Sorry to hear about the GF. I have found that pills are often cries for help, not serious attempts. But even so it must be very hard on you all. I hope that she is getting good psychiatric help to help deal with whatever is causing her issues.

grannyx2 wrote:

hmph to GF, sounds like maybe wasn't so keen on hols with DGD if you ask me.

All of you raise points that are worrying me.

Granny's comment was my first thought; GF didn't want to be replaced as the centre of DS2's attention..

But you should see them together; GF adores DGD, is always cuddling her or entertaining her - if that's an act, the woman deserves an Oscar!

GF obviously does not want to discuss her problems within the family. She has to visit her Psych-Doc every week, but according to Roger - who was also one of his patients - all the guy does is complete a brief check-list which goes like this:
1. Has the patient turned up? Yes - tick.
2. Does their acompañante say they are taking their meds? Yes - tick.
3. Is the patient: A) Somnolent? Awake? C) Agitated?
If A) - decrease meds. .....
If - issue another prescription. .....
If C) - increase meds. .....
4. Give patient the date/time of their next appointment. Yes - tick.

From a private chat with DS2; GF has told him she would like to talk to a Psychologist - they're the ones who do talking therapy - but apparently there isn't one on the staff at the clinic.
A question was left hanging in the air - it wasn't until after they'd gone that I realised DS was hoping I'd offer to pay for private treatment.
<sigh>
Brain fog is so annoying. It is a common problem for ME folk when relapsing but it's an invisible symptom, so observers rarely take account of it.
In fact I also forgot to ask Divo Two about his finances or offer him any more cash for the rest of DGD's holiday (which I had meant to ). Nor did we discuss a move to PC's cottage.

Now wondering whether DS2 is offended by my failure to catch on? ..Not heard from him since that visit.

Must say I feel dismayed; surely it should be GF's family who ought to subsidise or pay for private treatment? Assuming it's true that there really isn't a psychologist available via the state health system - which tbh, seems a bit unlikely. Maybe there's a waiting list?

My main concern is DGD's well-being. And DS2 of course, but he's a grown man (and his brain works a lot better than mine atm!). He did tell me that apparently GF has these 'attacks' at roughly six month intervals - so hopefully the risk is lower for a while; time to find out more and get the right help before her next crisis.

Preferably without me footing the bill. There's no chance of that if she's not prepared to talk openly with me.
Besides which, I have other obligations. Divo Four still hasn't got his accommodation sorted out for uni. Am expecting to front his deposit and first term's rent at least..
:think:
In fact, were I not so afraid of PC's death duties bill, it might make sense to sink everything into buying a small house that DS4 could share with another couple of students.


Time to go - Daft Dogs are barking and licking their lips at me; lunch is late [again, oops]. :cool2: