Sports clubs - is there a requirement to disclose my son's disability?

mrs_sparrow

undaunted wrote: »

Personally I think you'd be better off with someone in the know & wanting to help than someone "blind" so I would tell them.

I don't know where you are / who might help but in addition to Louis Smith I believe Michael Phelps and Ashley McKenzie (British Judo) have adhd so it can be done. Recent Guardian article on the subject

http://www.guardian.co.uk/society/2012/aug/01/athletes-with-adhd

Perhaps the Charity mentioned here may be able to suggest someone locally?

Fantastic, thank you. I have a day at home tomorrow so I am going to check loads of stuff out.

Fire_Fox

mrs_sparrow wrote: »

NAR and Fire Fox - not as far as I am aware, if I go to the council they will give me details of these clubs in Gymnastics. But, to be honest, I never thought of reporting them before.

The council should have someone in the Sports Development team who is responsible for disability provision, and there should be members of staff within the council gyms or school system that are qualified to work with disabilities. The council ought to be chasing this up for you, not giving you lists of general gymnastics classes. This is what you pay council tax for: if you don't get any help from that department, go to your councillor or MP. Also try the other routes I suggested, I agree it seems unfair to go the disability route rather than all 'mainstream' classes being inclusive, but that is going to take time to change and I assume you want a coach sooner rather than later.

mrs_sparrow

Fire_Fox wrote: »

Maybe you should approach this a different way, try to find coaches that are qualified/ experienced with working with disabilities and special needs? You might ask the local council sports development team, physical education teachers at any schools in the area, coaching/ fitness registration bodies, perhaps even people involved in the Special Olympics?

I can see how you could get away with not telling clubs your son has ADHD if he is well medicated, but if you don't say he has ASD you could look like an overbearing mother with a spoiled child if you insist on staying and you 'interfere' when he has a meltdown. You might also consider different terminology, meltdown has some very negative connotations.

Letters are more difficult to ignore than telephone calls.

I'll be honest FF, I have asked at school, I have asked the school PE teacher (who comes in from an outside group) after he told me my son was very good and strong, I called the British Paralympic Association - they told me to call British Gymnastics - I've tried to get 1:1 coaching but as we are club 'outsiders' they won't do it as 1:1 is generally for helping their squad get a skill up to par. I've tried the local council - the clubs they suggested I try I already had. I have a list from the local Disability Council Groups - the ones they told me to try I already had.

I honestly never thought of reporting any of them but I am going to start over again and am going to see if I can get my son's coach to write him a reference for when I apply to these groups and if they reject him I AM going to report them all.

mrs_sparrow

Fire_Fox wrote: »

The council should have someone in the Sports Development team who is responsible for disability provision, and there should be members of staff within the council gyms or school system that are qualified to work with disabilities. The council ought to be chasing this up for you, not giving you lists of general gymnastics classes. This is what you pay council tax for: if you don't get any help from that department, go to your councillor or MP. Also try the other routes I suggested, I agree it seems unfair to go the disability route rather than all 'mainstream' classes being inclusive, but that is going to take time to change and I assume you want a coach sooner rather than later.

To be honest, I did think that if I started him in a disabled group they would move him to the mainstream group when they saw his abilities and that he is not aggressive/etc... and his disability did not affect his ability*. I know that everyone boasts about their children but everyone that has taught him casual gymnastics cannot believe the abilities he has for a boy of his size. However, I need that foot in the door and there are no clubs under my own council that have a club offering disabled gymnastics (they are certainly not on the BG website), I have to go into the next county for this.

*ETA: I do not know if that makes me sound a bit naive and stupid. I was just hoping it would be a foot in the door to have his potential recognised.

mrs_sparrow

balletshoes wrote: »

I don't know if this is an option for you OP, but instead of phoning the club up the road, could you go into the club and ask to speak to the person in charge of the squads face to face? Explain how the squad training might help your son, explain how his existing club has helped him with the egg timer etc, and how you will deal with any meltdowns.

The local one do not want to know - this is the one that I had issues with. There is another I have emailed this morning. They are closed for the summer. I picked the right time to get a bee in my bonnet about this, didn't I?

I also looked at safe taught Parkour as an outlet for his abilities but the only one for his age closed and the coach seems to have done a runner with people's money as soon as he got to the right age...... :eek:

cheepskate_2

tiamai_d wrote: »

And people like you are the reason our children can't get into any clubs.

I bet you preach about equal rights and all that stuff, just not at your childs club huh?

Nope to your question. .....We are not all equal and it would be wrong to treat everyone as equal.....as that would cause discrimination, so the answer is no I do not preach about equal rights, Ever.
What I would preach is that everyone has a talent in something, whether you are disabled or not.

cheepskate_2

Mrs sparrow.......I think you have to re-think your terminology about the words you use to others about your child.

Meltdown........
The bit about him and repetition..........

If what you say is correct then , your way of describing him may be part of the problem
the use of "meltdown" to me and probably many others along with his ADH sets the scene for something different than him just hiding. This is an injustice to your sons behavior.

Not everyone will have an understanding of various illnesses and will only know them through the "media".
I know a few adh kids and when meltdown is used to describe their behavior it only means one thing

not having a dig....but how you describe your child , will give people the right or wrong initial perception about him.

miss_independent

Speaking as a Drama and Dance Teacher, I have taught hundreds of children in the 9 years since I started teaching at after school and weekend classes. I would say 30% of these children had special needs of some kind, mainly ADHD and Austism. In all this time, not ONE parent approached me in advance of their child starting classes. Had they, I certainly wouldn't have discriminated. In fact we have actually had ADHD and Autistic children perform in professional productions, provided and suggested by the school itself - we make sure they have the same opportunities as any other students although ANY bad behaviour from ANY child means their professional contract is terminated, we don't discriminate in that respect either lol!

For the record, the only children who have ever "lashed out" or attacked me in class have been children who did NOT have ADHD or Autism. One of my most polite, well mannered, popular students who I am exceptionally proud of has profound Autism. Yes he was disruptive as a 5 year old but I, as the teacher, learned to deal with it and not have other children in the class suffering with the disruption, and as a now 12 year old his behaviour is angelic! In fact it has been for many years thanks to AMAZING parental and school support and the positive way in which I have worked with him too. Most schools have at least one child with ADHD or Autism in each class - its part of life! It would have been nice if parents had told me in advance of their child's "disability" and perhaps given me advice of how to work with them (after all, I had no "official" special needs training when I started teaching) but maybe they thought I wouldn't allow their child to take part.

I don't really see why you should have to send your son to a "disabled" club, because not only does he have no physical problems (he would never be eligible for the Paralympics for example), he appears to have a natural gift for the sport and it may result in him being held back. If it was me, I wouldnt mention anything about your son's disability to any gym clubs as, in your area at least, people seem to be quite narrow minded. Better to let him start and if anything came up, which I doubt it would, you could explain things to the coach and make any necessary adjustments from there.

He deserves a chance. The child has a talent and it's ridiculous that he might not get the chance to reach his full potential because of his disability. Achievement builds self esteem and self worth, being held back from doing something he loves would only make him frustrated and unhappy with himself.

tiamai_d

cheepskate wrote: »

Nope to your question. .....We are not all equal and it would be wrong to treat everyone as equal.....as that would cause discrimination, so the answer is no I do not preach about equal rights, Ever.
What I would preach is that everyone has a talent in something, whether you are disabled or not.

Just not in your childs club incase the disabled child 'kicked off' yeah?

Backtracking much?

Spirit_2

A young man I know who is somewhere on the Autism spectrum and lacks social skills as a child his mum and dad were often asked to retrieve him from clubs or they volunteered as helpers to prolong his participation. He would 'meltdown' in group situations, lacking patience, over-react to any frustration by running off or exclaiming loudly. Not ADHD I know but a tricky boy to have in a group.

It emerged that if he could focus on something (and had understanding teachers or coaches) he would usually develop a high level skill. So far....

He is extremely successful at sport, swimming at national level as a youth, a black belt in a martial art a successful street dancer, current passion and very good at it.... ballet .

Speaks another language now, TEFL, has a first class degree and a further degree from Oxbridge.

Good luck in your search for an inclusive club and coach.