Women leaving the past behind?...

DalePie

Nan63 wrote: »

Ah, bless you. I doubt if the girls were miserable in Ibiza, they have just moved on from that part of their life. There is a lot of pressure today to be the perfect mum and in all reality, drunkeness and skimpy clothes don't help that image (not saying that's right or wrong, that is just society today).

Enjoy your own memories OP and carrying on making many more exactly how you want to!

Ha Ha! You read my reply before I hit the big EDIT button.

Nan63

Guilty as charged m'lud

sassyblue

For me, l've just moved on. FB wasn't around when l was mis-spending my youth anyway. But l don't keep lots of photos on there, you can get hacked and l would feel uneasy if my photos were stolen, not that there's anything untoward they're just personal.

Plus you know yourself how many times you change your hairstyle, no way would l want photos from the 80's or 90's on there.

So l think it's just a hairstyle or clothing thing. :rotfl:

I don't think they are denying or rewriting their history, the past is gone your life gets filled with other things.

onlyroz

I think it's a bit weird when people post photos of themselves when drunk - or allow others to do the same. It's as if people have no concept of presenting a good image of themselves.

dizziblonde

heartbreak_star wrote: »

IMO some women (NOT ALL, before I get flamed) lose their own identity when they give birth, and even more so when their kids start nursery and go to clubs and things. For example, the woman formerly known as Sarah becomes "Connor's mum" and and the woman who was Susan becomes "Shannon's mum", etc etc.

Some women seem to embrace this loss of their own identity with glee...I find it a bit sad if you can only define yourself through another person (same as if a woman refers to herself as "Mrs Gordon Bennett" despite being called Lydia).

All of this is just how I feel mind!

HBS x

I've always refused to do this - yes I changed my surname when I got married because my old one was an unspellable pain in the rear - but I hate hate hate being called Mrs Joe Bloggs and I have zero intention of being known as Johnny's Mummy (disclaimer: if my little girl was called Johnny I'd be worried) - while I obviously produced the most amazing, clever, funny, beautiful baby ever to grace the surface of this earth - I didn't cease to be me, just added another bit of me!

As for the FB photos - I hate photos of myself anyway so there are minimal online - but the only parts of my past I'd seek to obliterate are the photos (and if I find the comedienne with a scanner who dredged 'em up there will be wrath) of the hideous 1980s perm.

peachyprice

Gigglepig wrote: »

Maybe after they have babies, these women are concerned that people like their MIL will show more interest in their photo albums hence need to sanitise?

My thoughts would be exactly this ^^

They start using FB to share pictures of their children with their and the OH's family. They don't want those people seeing pictures of them in Ibiza glugging down a bottle of tequila whilst topless.

Although don't take this as gospel as it's just a theory from someone who has absolutley no need to plaster her life over the www.

DevilsAdvocate1

Lots of people refer to me as my children's mum. Its not that I've lost my identity, its just that they learn my child's name first because the children have become friends. My son will not know his friend's mum's name, so will ask me "Can you ask Tom's mum if Tom can come to tea".

I don't understand this whole idea of losing your idenity because you have children. I am sure I'm viewed as one of those sad mums, but I am still me, no matter how I am referred to.

pinkclouds

heartbreak_star wrote: »

IMO some women (NOT ALL, before I get flamed) lose their own identity when they give birth, and even more so when their kids start nursery and go to clubs and things. For example, the woman formerly known as Sarah becomes "Connor's mum" and and the woman who was Susan becomes "Shannon's mum", etc etc.

Some women seem to embrace this loss of their own identity with glee.

I wouldn't put it in quite that tone...? But it's true, for a given value of "true". All my "mommy" friends, acquired from hanging around nursery school, started out as "so-and-so's mommy" because that's how kids refer to them (as least when they are toddlers).

As for all the baby/child FB photos or whatever, that's simply because people talk about what they do all day. If I was a geologist, I'd post photos of interesting rocks. But I'm a SAHM so I mostly talk about my kids. Although, of course, everyone also talks about general stuff for a lesser percentage of the time e.g. news/current affairs.

Nothing is more interesting to me than my kids. (One is currently snuggled on my lap and the other is playing in the same room.) However, other people's kids are also interesting albeit not to the same extent. If talking about babies/children is dull, don't stay friends with people who have kids.

raven83

I have pitcures on my facebook but i must admit some of the really bad ones i have taken off, for a number of reasons, mainly because should my kids go on facebook in the future they will see the pictures but also because i am a lot different to the person i was some years ago, i rarely go out now and drink and i feel better for it. Also i have friends on my facebook who still go out and have a debauched time, these are 29/30 something woman with kids with their boobies out and flashing their pants and in suggestive poses, i just don't think its nice, more because potenial employers can see these and they will form an opinion of you from the pitcures. I am far from a prude and have had quite a colourful past but for me i don't feel the need to have it all over facebook anymore, i've evolved and in fact my sense of identity is a lot stronger these days than it was ever back then.

Person_one

dizziblonde wrote: »

I've always refused to do this - yes I changed my surname when I got married because my old one was an unspellable pain in the rear

Got any brothers?