Real life MMD: Are my parents dividing the will fairly?

scoobydoobydoo

Stay out of it,, their money = their choice

scoobydoobydoo

Oh and as for parents dying before step parents, it is possible to write a will where a share is only allowed to be passed on to blood children after the step parent has died. I believe it is call "in perpetuity" in that it cant be left to anyone else other than who is stipulated in the will. I am sure I will corrected though!

Saetana

It sounds perfectly reasonable to me and, as others have pointed out, it is your parents' decision to make, not yours. I hope my parents spend all their money enjoying their life, not saving to give to us two children after their death, we need to get away from this inheritance culture!

cazpost

I think there are a lot of things to be considered here. How old were you all when they got married,did they bring you all up as one family? Or were you all adults when they married.Did they both have assets when they married? Have they both contributed equally to their joint assets? What provision have they made for each other? What provision have they made for funeral expenses,care expenses etc.
Above all it is entirely up to them,and none of you should expect to get anything. For all you know,they might decide to leave it all to charity.

alittlemadam

I to had this same dilemma, my husband has 3 children from his first marriage and 2 with me.

Our will says that his half of the inheritence will be split 5 ways but my half will only split 2.

I dont see why I should have to share my hard earned cash with anyone but my children and more to the point his children from his previous marriage dont acknowledge either of us or my children anyhow but he still wants to provide something for them (his choice not mine).

I am not overly happy about it but do understand that they deserve at least something. He has discussed this with them and his ex and everybody seems happy.

We drafted up a letter and got everyone to sign that they agree to this and got it witness by the solicitor so theres know going back on any's word

trinity_enigma

I'd be interested to know if the OP would be so happy and at peace with their parents decision if they were to be the sibling receiving less. I suspect they would no longer feel it fair and entirely up to their parents then.

I have awkward family situations and the less I think about what could be in the wills, the better as I just know they are likely to cause upset.

chloenightingale

I think you are right in thinking it is fair -- and it is your parents' decision, after all. If you and your sister really feel awful about it after your parents pass away, you can always give some of your share to your siblings. ;D

A.Jones

I remember a similar situation with my grandmother. She wanted to skip a generation, and leave money only to grandchildren. She had two daughters, my mum and my aunt. My mum had three kids (inc me) and my aunt only one. She wanted to leave 1/4 each to each grandchild as she saw this as fair between grandchildren. My aunt was furious, saying it is unfair that her children only get 1/4 and my mums children get 3/4. She hasn't died yet (luckily for us), so I don't know what the resolution was.

EasternEye

There are two elements to this:-
1. What is fair?
2. What should you do?

In answer to Point 1 - we haven't been given enough information - eg -
- how much capital did both partners bring with them ? and what are their current financial positions ?
- is the father of the step children still alive? What capital does he have and how likely is he to leave something to your half-siblings?
- what are the ages of the children and the parents ?
- who is living with who and what are the relationships between all parties concerned?
etc etc

With regards to Point 2-
I would suggest following previous advice and let your parents decide.
However if they should ask you for your opinion you should try to think about how you would feel if you were one of your half-siblings, bearing in mind all the circumstances - DD

JimmyTheWig

I agree with Girly_Girl and cazpost that it depends on timings and how much of a parent the mum has been to the step-children. If she has been a mum to them then I think it should be an even split. If not then I think the split is reasonable as it is.

For example in alittlemadam's case (post #16) I think she has it right, but in my cousin's case (he married his wife when her children from a previous relationship were small and he is now a dad to them) an even split would be fairer.