Daughter buying lunch for skint school friend.

mrcow

You need to tell the school. They can tell the girls to stop this and it will be more appropriate coming from them than from you. They can then also check on what this other girl is being given for lunch (if anything).

londonsurrey

peachyprice wrote: »

No, the child shouldn't go hungry, however, OP's daughter isn't in a position to prevent it, her parents are footing the bill.

It's for the school to deal with not a child. The right thing to do and the right lesson to teach the child is that she should be comfortable to go to her parents and the school for them to take the appropriate action, not shoulder the responsiblity for feeding this child herself.

Yes, and that's the ideal solution. When that happens, then that's the child fed.

In the meantime, for the myriad of reasons that gave rise to this situation in the first place, whilst the child is not properly provided for, I would rather the child be fed than be left to go without on principle.

I would be proud to have a daughter like the OP's. Ideally, she would have brought the situation to her mother's attention to start with. But she used her early teen judgement to the best of her ability, and I think she's done pretty well. Her instincts are not to let a friend go hungry. Do we teach children to share biscuits and treats in order to look good to other adults, or do we teach them to share things because the other person actually needs it?

jellyhead

If school is made aware that there are potential problems with the family then it's more likely that the siblings will be fed once they get to secondary school.

School might have a way of stepping in without making the girls uncomfortable - perhaps a member of staff might have 'seen' your daughter buying the other girl's lunch too often?

I agree with Londonsurrey, I'd be proud if she were my daughter, even though it's not sustainable for you to continue with things this way.

Sally_A

I think your daughter is being lovely and caring, by limiting the amount on her prepaid card, your daughter will still share with he best friend, so will only be getting 50% of what you think.

At that age, it would be better if the girl confided in your daughter rather than you stirring it with the school (but you can help in edging the conversation that way )., which would give you a better insight into the circumstances.

Hopefully 10 -20 years down the line, the recipient will be posting on here on how the kindness of a friend to share their lunch got them through some hard times.:T