Money, TTC, Morals and in need of advice.

Gillyx

Had to phone them there for a unrelated thing, and I queried my amounts and he checked and he said it's correct, so no idea...

carolineb23

It is a tough one as I completely understand the desire to have a child esp after having suffered a loss, but personally I would wait until you have a bit more financial security. As some posters mention above it can be done on a shoestring but there will always be something unexpected that pops up, not necessarily as a tiny baby but as they get older they get more expensive! At 26 you still have plenty of time left, and you are no more likely to have a 2nd miscarriage (sorry to hear you have already had one) if you wait a bit (I think its once you hit 30 the risk goes up a bit). I agree with the previous poster who mentioned the benefits trap, it can be so easy to fall into and hard to get out of. Perhaps you could start preparing your body/diet/lifestyle for pregnancy if it helps, it might make you feel like you are "doing something" towards it. With regards to the childcare cost and whether it's worth working, that totally depends on what you call "worth it". In our area it's about £35 a day for a nursery so it does take a considerable chunk of salary, but in my situation for example, as much as I don't really want to have to return to work and pay for childcare, I know it won't last forever and I'd rather have this job than have to look for another when my baby starts school. It keeps my skills relevant too, so although I'm not going to be working for much money when I do go back, I'm looking at it as a bit of a necessary evil for a few years until the childcare bills stop. I really hope I don't sound harsh saying this but to be honest, TTC now wouldn't be the most responsible thing to do imo.