how soon would you tell your manager you were pregnant?

fly_dragon_fly

Hello,

I will be 6 weeks pregnant on Friday and suffered a miscarriage in March when I was just 5 weeks so fingers crossed this one sticks.

Due to this I am wondering when to tell my manager, I work in a small food shop doing 4 hour shifts and one 8 hour shift but am standing on my feet with no seat for 3 hours 15 minutes and 7 hours and 30 minutes on the longer shift.

When would you tell your manager / boss you were pregnant? would you wait until 12 weeks or tell them now?

becominganobsessivesaver

I suppose it depends on the relationship. Both times I have told my managers early (I had problems in the first trimester). First time they pretended to be understanding, but were very sneaky (appraisal grade changed, overlooked for promotion etc - very naughty but I couldn't be bothered to pursue). Second time (different employer - I never went back to the previous one!) they were incredibly understanding, and I'm glad I told them.

dizsiebubba

I told mine after about 7 weeks. I felt sick the whole time and it was just awkward so easier once they knew xxx

ETA - My boss has been moody with me ever since (but he is that way inclined anyway) but everyone else has been fine..HR, Bosses Boss...

Nan63

In this instance, I would tell your manager sooner rather than later. That at least gives them opportunity to allow you to get the rest periods you need (or at least a seat to sit on if possible?).

Good luck with your pregnancy, hope all goes well.

Gigglepig

I would put it off as long as possible, and only tell them at a point where it becomes necessary to have adjustments in the workplace or time off for ante natal care. Some employers are not nice about it so why risk it unless you have to.

lowlitmemory

I do think it depends on what you think their reaction is, sadly. I knew mine would be good, and when it was very hot recently I just told my manager as I wanted someone to know in case I fainted in the heat or something similar. I was about 6-7 weeks along. Had I worked somewhere I knew to be less sympathetic, I may have waited a bit. I also thought, m/cs are traumatic and if it did happen then best she already knew about the pregnancy (as a personal feeling, not necessarily applicable to everyone!).

Hope it all goes well for you.

skintchick

I would tell them as then they will have to let you have a stool to sit on.

I was in a job wher eI told early then had a miscarriage, they were lovely about it but very soon after they had to make some redundancies and I was one of them. My role probably was sheddable (I was the only person doing it and it wasn;t as vital as others) but I could never shake off the feeling that they did it because I was TTC. In fact I was 5 weeks gone when they got rid of me but they didn't know that.

Anyway, in your situation I would tell so that I could get a seat and look after myself at work. THey have to know sometime anyway.

Arewethereyet?

Depends really on your workplace, as there are rules for Pregnant Mothers within the workplace from the HSE.

For us, I kept quiet until the 12wk scan point. When i needed time off to attend.

fly_dragon_fly

skintchick wrote: »

I would tell them as then they will have to let you have a stool to sit on.

I was in a job wher eI told early then had a miscarriage, they were lovely about it but very soon after they had to make some redundancies and I was one of them. My role probably was sheddable (I was the only person doing it and it wasn;t as vital as others) but I could never shake off the feeling that they did it because I was TTC. In fact I was 5 weeks gone when they got rid of me but they didn't know that.

Anyway, in your situation I would tell so that I could get a seat and look after myself at work. THey have to know sometime anyway.

There isn't enough room behind the till to have a stool so it's just not possible, it's a known food retail company beginning with C and they have been amazing but I've only been there 7 months now although not a newbie now.

Gigglepig

fly_dragon_fly wrote: »

There isn't enough room behind the till to have a stool so it's just not possible, it's a known food retail company beginning with C and they have been amazing but I've only been there 7 months now although not a newbie now.

If you have only been there 7 month I wouldn't be surprised if they are not very sympathetic.

I obviously don't know anything about your circumstances, but as a pregnant woman myself I would not dream of taking a job and trying for a baby within months (unless forced t by redundancy and there were medical reasons not to delay). I just would not find that professional and would be concerned that the employer thought I was taking the pi** and exploiting their maternity leave policies. But again, it may depend on whether you see it as a career or a casual job and how difficult it would be for your employer to find and pay for a temporary replacement.

skintchick

Gigglepig wrote: »

If you have only been there 7 month I wouldn't be surprised if they are not very sympathetic.

I obviously don't know anything about your circumstances, but as a pregnant woman myself I would not dream of taking a job and trying for a baby within months (unless forced t by redundancy and there were medical reasons not to delay). I just would not find that professional and would be concerned that the employer thought I was taking the pi** and exploiting their maternity leave policies. But again, it may depend on whether you see it as a career or a casual job and how difficult it would be for your employer to find and pay for a temporary replacement.

That's fine if you are in your 20s, but if you are any older,or if your partner is over 40, then you can;t delay TTC! Also, not everyone who gets pregnant gets a take home baby, so sometimes you have to keep trying because it might take you three or four pregnancies before you actually get a baby. Peopple can;t be expected to put their lives on hold for the benefit of employers - no employer would do the same for an employee!

Life should not be based on what a boss or company will think as ultimately they are only interested in profits, not people.

Besides which, if it is a career then you will be going back, and if it's just a mcjob then you don't care about it anyway! So either way pregnancy and TTC makes no difference overall.

But OP, back to you In that case maybe don;t tell them? What is your gut feeling? Would you prefer not to?

Oh and I can;t think of a food retailer beginning with C!