Hoarding...not just on TV

whitewing

Jojo,

Just enjoy your beer, and count to 10. And count to 10 again.

While I don't agree with being walked all over, I can't see how posting anything to partner is going to help you in the long run, even if she deserves to know and deserves to be told. Much better if she finds out from someone else anyway.

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

whitewing wrote: »

Jojo,

Just enjoy your beer, and count to 10. And count to 10 again.

While I don't agree with being walked all over, I can't see how posting anything to partner is going to help you in the long run, even if she deserves to know and deserves to be told. Much better if she finds out from someone else anyway.

[sigh]. I know. Had the situation been reversed, I know he would not hesitate to gleefully present proof everywhere and he would do it in the total belief he was being a hero in setting the world to rights about how awful a person he had caught out.

But the odds are that he would a) deny it b) claim it was Photoshopped by me c) claim it was for friendship only d) say she was being unreasonable in thinking he meant anything by it e) point out she's now about 33, so is getting on/has let herself go f) say he's very attractive to younger women, unlike her, as middleaged women aren't appealing, g) that she doesn't fulfill his needs and other such crap h) that it was when she was ill and neglecting him and i) that if she says one word, he'll make sure she loses the house and he'll stay in it whilst she has to live in a bedsit and pay his bills.



So she probably wouldn't do anything about it anyway. And he'll just go right on doing as he pleases all the time. And whilst DD needs to learn that he isn't the wonderful person she thinks he is, I don't want to be the one who shatters her illusion.



Meh.

GreyQueen

((Jo Jo))


Sometimes it takes time for things to come around but, eventually, character does out, even to besotted offspring.

I used to know a lady who had divorced, for many and very good reasons, the father of her child, when the lad was about 8 years old.

Her lad gave her very serious emotional weather for a number of years over splitting with his Dad, although he continued to see him and spend weekends. She never spoke against her ex, not wanting to poison their relationship.

One day when he was about 12, he came back from his Dad's, and told her in exasperation Bloody Hell, Mum, I can see why you divorced him!

She managed to remain composed until the the privacy of her own room, but it was sooooo hard.

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

Just remembered I hadn't paid a bill, so shot down here to get that sorted before it kept me awake all night.


Managed to get the new dressing table/vanity into my bedroom and the old collapsing CoD out. Bt not any further today.

I did try to summons up the energy to do it, but I've just not got anymore fight in me. I'm done.

craigywv

alec_eiffel wrote: »

My favourite childhood doll (a baby beans) is in the drawer in my bedside table. He is very much the worse for wear as I ripped off his denim cap and put him in a Barcelona football kit in 1984. But he lives there and I believe him to be happy.

:rotfl:
thought it was just me ...mine named BOB also lives in my bedside drawer im 40 he a bear that sucks its thumbs but body made of beans chicco something. Whole family knows he there and not to touch him,oh has put earphones on him and a cigarette in his mouth sitting beside a tin of beer and posted it on facebook telling people he his love rival. Bob goes abroad every time i do, he was at my wedding in Florida and has photos sitting amongst the flowers and presents.............yes i am quite sane and i am also disallusioned lol. but he will be there with me to the end!.....Bob is also happy living in my drawer...he told me so:rotfl:

VJsmum

craigywv wrote: »

:rotfl:
thought it was just me ...mine named BOB also lives in my bedside drawer im 40 he a bear that sucks its thumbs but body made of beans chicco something. Whole family knows he there and not to touch him,oh has put earphones on him and a cigarette in his mouth sitting beside a tin of beer and posted it on facebook telling people he his love rival. Bob goes abroad every time i do, he was at my wedding in Florida and has photos sitting amongst the flowers and presents.............yes i am quite sane and i am also disallusioned lol. but he will be there with me to the end!.....Bob is also happy living in my drawer...he told me so:rotfl:

BOB sounds like Honey Bear who lives in our bed. OH's (of course) bear bought before he was born. It is the UGLIEST bear you have ever seen. BIL had a similar one called Pink Ted and, when BIL died, it was buried with him as his very young children thought it should be. OH has categorically stated that the same fate must not befall Honey Bear and made our daughter swear that she will have him.

I'll just put the fish collection in there instead! :rotfl:

wannabe_sybil

Jojo - just signing in hastily to send hugs.

Poorly so nothing happening.

hugs to all esp Elona and Byatt

elona

JoJo

Have a good cry and bash a pillow. Eventually she will realise the truth but would not thank you for being the one to try to tell her.
Hold your head up and do nothing that either you or anyone else can see as negative even if you have to grit your teeth. Sending a hug seems inadequate but please don't let them beat you.

Still waiting for firm diagnosis but at least dd's heart seems all right. They are doing an angiogram on her kidneys in the next few days and that should answer some questions (or raise more questions.)

D&DD

JoJo hope you're having a brighter day today,not long til the meet now and I have very broad shoulders and a good listening ear..well pair actually but you know what I mean XXX


Elona so pleased you have some positive news hun don't forget to try and make time for yourself XXX

Byatt hope you have a lovely day XX

I have too many sickly bodies at home ATM to have a hope in hell of decluttering so am cooking instead today

XX

Byatt

How are doing today Jo-Jo?

Elona, thinking of you.

The counselling session went well, had a few tears and showed her the pics of my house. :eek: For some reason I hoped she'd say it wasn't too bad...but of course she didn't.

She's suggested I clear one bit, take pics of before and after and show her next week.

She also said I'm surrounding myself with stuff relating to the past (not sure about that one), and that it stops me from relaxing, feeling good etc, all that Jo-Jo has said really. Plus she said how do you cook? I can't just think oh, I'll bake a cake...or make a pie, I don't have space.

When I came home, I thought... I am burying myself alive with all this stuff. I am not living but existing. That makes sense to me and I will explore it further of the next few days.