Hoarding...not just on TV

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

Afternoon, all!


I'd be inclined to chuck the almost knackered trolley now as a) you have a good replacement and b) they only ever give up the ghost when you are 45 minutes away from home with nobody to help you carry the contents.


The quilt bag? They look good, but the plastic tends to split and it just means the knitting, in this case, gets bunged into a pile and left, especially as there is already another bag with stuff in. One or the other.


I have been wasting my life pottering around on Pinterest recently. It's a way of mentally cluttering/hoarding/organizing/scrapbooking stuff you like the look of rather than having a load of things all over your home stopping you from having a life. Maybe anybody who is feeling an urge to go online and shop unnecessarily could have a look there instead?



Power cuts don't scare me. I've had a couple due to substation problems. I know my house and spend around 99.8% of my time barefoot. If I have to go downstairs at night, I never switch on any lights. And seeing as the house is timberframed, there's no way I'm letting candles in here. The only ones I have can go into the lantern I have in the garden (which does look rather lovely).

If you live in the middle of nowhere, I can see there could be a need, but most places in the UK have quite sufficient light pollution along with moonlight to be able to see what you are doing at night if there is a cut.

elona

We had someone coming to look at ensuite at 10 and DH commented about an hour before then how his side of bedroom was clear and mine was the opposite. He got the reply that by 10 o'clock that would not be the case.

Sorted through books, ones I wanted to keep were taken downstairs to big bookcase and others put in bag for charity shop. Clean clothes were put in wardrobe and I even decluttered some tops I did not like.

DH stunned at the difference and even more stunned when I walked down to CS later with a bag full of stuff.

thriftwizard

D'you know, Blossomhill & Jojo, you're absolutely right. Big trolley will go off to the tip tomorrow; it's possible that someone else will rescue it (as I did about 10 years ago)) and give it a few more months of useful life, if they're not hauling around as much stuff as I am, or, indeed, use the wheels, or the frame, for something innovative! But I have no further need for it. As it happens, the market's only 5 minutes walk away, and you can buy trolleys there should disaster strike, but they're not the sturdiest. Also, it's open 3 days a week, and now I'm not running the shop I can get there on more than one day, so it doesn't matter any more if I don't do it all in one hit.

Well done, Elona, with the books; I'm sorting a bag of them to go as I go through DS3's room. Not his books but mine which have somehow strayed into there - along with a suitcase full of extremely boring vintage fabric (that'll be why I never missed it) and yet more odds & sods which will continue to tie me down until they're on their way out to that craft workshop in India - the sooner the better!

GreyQueen

Evening all.

Whilst I was away, I stopped over at the parents' for a few hours and, amongst other things, Mum and I watched that follow-up documentary about Richard. It was fascinating to me because I hadn't seen the first one but had heard lots about it from you wonderful peeps on here.

My thoughts were.....OMG........what a lovely bloke.......OMG......that's a nice bungalow under there......OMG OMG OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It's hard for me to understand the attraction of keeping manky unwashed milk bottles and packaging materials all squashed into a pile and Mum and I, who both have claustrophobic tendancies, were squirming at the images of him crawling thru the tunnels in his home.

But what really made me sit up and take notice was when he and his helper were discussing getting the milk bottles out of the kitchen and Richard was stressing about it and saying how there were only half a dozen and that it wouldn't make a difference and it wasn't worth bothering with etc etc.

I had a light bulb moment as this connected with stuff I have been reading on children of hoarder websites esp tetanus burger, about PERFECTIONISM. Now, on the surface of it, chronic and insanitary hoarderism and perfectionism seem to be strange bedfellows, but there was an underlying thread of consciousness that if it couldn't be done perfectly it couldn't be done at all..............it made me think very hard. I've struggled with perfectionism and it's taken me a long time to accept that things are good enough and to get on with something else.

And, as we all saw, there were a darned sight more than half a dozen milk bottles and getting them out did make a difference.

I'm finding that once I've decided something is going OUT, I want it OUT then and there, or there is a real danger of backsliding.

Take the dressing gown. I had a very tatty thin cotton one from a c.s. It wasn't particularly my thing but it served its purpose and had had several mends which meant that it wasn't suitable for re-gifting. I took a deep breath and splashed out what was to me a lot of money (£17 ) on a new one. I washed the old one and then the dialogue started.

What if I need it for wearing in hospital? It's thinner than the new one and would be about the perfect weight? What if I need a spare for when the other is in the wash? Whatifwhatifwhatif.....

I'm sure you know where I'm coming from. Once it was dry, I bundled it up into a bag labelled "Rag" and forced myself to take a special 5 min trip down the road to the recycling bin to get rid of it to shut up the clamour in my head. Arrggghhhhhhh!

This weekend, due to a wee medical problemo, I shall be having some downtime at the homestead and intend to poke around in some files (terrestrial and electronic) and have a good turf out.

Anyroad, whatever you're doing in the next few days, let's make it steady as she goes and productive, too.

Love and peas, GQ xx

sjprmc01

I DEF agree with The perfectionism/hoarderism thing!

Sometimes i have to re do things OH has done because its not done 'right'. And I cannot be around him when he does dishes as it stresses me out that he is not doing them 'right'.

SpikyHedgehog

whitewing wrote: »

Candlestick is going to a better home.

Half used candles in glass tubs are going. They were decorations until the power cut. But have some spares for future power cuts ( a much rarer event than when I was young).

Still a lot to do. Not at the stage yet where I feel lighter myself with all the changes but I expect that will come. We have people visiting in Sept who will be sure to notice the difference, so that will keep me motivated.

What's the best way to clean net curtains? I really ought to do them.

I do all 6 of my nets in 1 wash load with a little bleach & fabric conditioner so they smell nice for ages (i use laundry gloop & diluted vinegar most of the time).

wannabe_sybil wrote: »

I am not doing very well this week but I thought I would throw open the latest dilemma to you kind ones.

I have just put a new mattress topper on OH's bed. I want to keep the old one, to have one in the wash/drawer and one on the bed. OH has night sweats, so I like to be able to switch stuff over, and the new mattress topper is the latest in this.

The bag it came in is fab! It is quite large, navy and clear and has a zip top. It is just the right size for a knitting project bag for my sweaters (and probably smaller things as well). It even has a plastic inner which once held the cardboard bit identifying the mattress topper but now that has been removed it is an excellent size for a pattern. I want to keep it. Lots of sweaters are half started and sitting around in carriers or swing bin liners. I was thinking of keeping current projects in it - zipped up and out of the way, with the aim for only having that on the go.

I really, really, really want to keep it - and I want to use it to transfer one of my projects into straight away. But I think one of the identifiers of a hoarder is looking at an item that is about to be discarded and thinking - I could use that in a different way. It is a useful thing. It is too good to throw away. It seems a shame to waste it.

Any thoughts?

Blossomhill - love that name!

If you're going to use the bag, it won't be hoarding. If you're going to keep the bag with the plan of using it, it is hoarding... When we got our cat, Errant Husband got her a scratching post that came in a strong bag I reused for my good tablecloth & napkins. The scratching post is long gone as she didn't use it, but the linen is still in the bag. (Ok, I do have to address my keeping a huge tablecloth & 8 napkins that I've used about 4 times in the 5 years I've been at this house, but that's another matter...)

sjprmc01

Nothing leaving the house today......oh, wait! I did bin a sequinned top that the sequins scratch my arms when they brush against the front, one of the dd's vests and a pair of OHs socks that had a hole in! Other than that I've mainly been trying to keep on top of things ( laundry/ironing/dishes). I've not yet got rid of my first bag of ironing and any laundry I've done since has been added to it Nothing will get done over the weekend either, as I'm working. Although may try to squeeze in a touch of ironing as I need all the time I can get for that if I'm EVER going to get up to date with it

Eta : I've just read my minimalism thread (if only) and realise I've also made progress today and yesterday throwing out (in the recycling) dd's shoe boxes from their 'good' footwear (that I tend to keep, no idea why) ie. trainer boxes, converse, kickers, ash, lelli Kelly. I think I initially keep them as I think if I was ever to ell the shoes they would get more money if boxed but then most of the shoes (if they fit right) go through all 3 girls so are not fit for selling at the end anyway!

thriftwizard

Ohmigosh, perfectionism, that rings a bell - sjprmc01, my OH is just the same with the washing up. I'm the only other person in the house trusted to do it; if one of the kids, or the lodger, or a guest does it, he will actually take it off the rack & do it all over again!

sjprmc01

Oh yeah, if his mum was ever here to watch the kids and. Done the dishes tht were left to do I'd ALWAYS redo them! The only times he bothers with the dishes himself now is at the weekends when I'm out at work, thing is, he practically has the dishes off you before you are finished using them but uses the brush for everything which then sends bubbles/'Dort' flying towards the rack with clean stuff on......I'm already getting a chill tun king about it. Yet I'll leave them till we have none left then clean them to within an inch of their life!

And went he girls were babies I really, really struggled with letting him do the bottles too (5,6,7 yrs ago when it used to be ok to make them up in advance if they were going to be used within 24hrs)

wannabe_sybil

Perfectionism :eek::eek::eek::eek: Washing up :eek::eek::eek::eek::eek: This is all so true!

The biggest row I have ever, ever had with OH was over washing up - I won't let him now, because that particular time, I swear the glasses were opaque. They were dirtier than when he started, I don't know how he did it, but you could start with half a bowl of quite cool water instead of the full bowl of hot water, changed appropriately that I use. And in the cutlery draining tub I always put the knives point down, so they don't stick someone, and everything else point up, so you can see what it is.

As for vacuuming - he doesn't see the strip near the skirting board. You should have seen the mess he made of just vacuuming the obvious bits in his bedroom.

And do not start about him and ironing. It would make you cry watching!

And not doing it unless you can do it properly - that is such a thing for me, and the same for my mother.

It is so scary seeing these little bits and pieces that are common to all of us.

I shall use the bag within the week. If I don't, I need to rethink things. I have a lot of things to watch, so I am going to finish off a few things while I am watching, then get a sweater set up in the bag. I am short of sweaters, it is going to get cooler (though last October we had a heat wave!) and I need to get a move on.

GreyQueen - hope you feel better soon

Byatt - hugs

sjprmc01 - you are doing brilliantly. I bet you are getting things out quicker than they came in - and there's a thought!