Nice people thread part 6 - thrice by twice as nice :)

LydiaJ

mystic_trev wrote: »

This used to be my favourite book as a child - 50 + years ago! I doubt you'll find it on many bookshelves now.

We had that! The book, and a little 45rpm record of it. The tigers had been given more words to boast with on the record, and sang little songs:

I'm the grandest tiger in the jungle,
now I've got the purple shoes.
Handsome is the word I use...

and

I'm the grandest tiger in the jungle,
brolly perched above my back.
Showerproof describes me Jack...

and

I'm the dandy of the tigers' den.
I'm the grandest tiger, since who knows when?

I can't remember any more. They were fun, and we didn't perceive them as racist - they certainly didn't affect our view of the black (adopted) child of close friends of the family. However, I know my (black) sister-in-law wouldn't like them, so I haven't shared them with my kids. They have other things instead that upset nobody.

lostinrates

Kennyboy66 wrote: »

I suspose it depends on whether you think that comic depictions of black people are funny (I'm sure you don't). The difficulty is you are probably fond of them because they belong to a different time and place.

If you had black friends over to dinner - would you be happy to have them on display ?

I was in York a few weeks ago, where they are still on sale - it would be impossible for them to be sold in Liverpool nowadays (for example).

On a side not - a teacher at my primary school (circa 1976) had the class singing a song called "Sambo had an auntie".

I'd be keeping them in the bedroom out of sight.

Good way to look at it. One of them was given to me by a black friend who knows me well. (he is also gay and roared with laughter and my 'gay' teddy. We are not the sort of adults that have stuffed toys(in fact, i was barely rhe sort of child too, my parents were rightly tight on both buying too many toys and also shedding them, essential when you move a lot) so the ones that got through are few, and are all on a 'politically incorrect' window seat together, the pink teddy, a mixed race coue of toys, so e hunting ones...a hare and a fox, and the gollies. So i think how i felt about them being here with black friends might depend on who the friends were. No one has expressed disapproval. I would be more worried about offending people who did not know me, and who might feel unwelcome or that the negative connatations are views i would hold as opposed to my friends.


Regarding the ' comic depictions of black people' no more so than comic desriptions of white people. I personally just don't make the copnnection someone maybe twenty years older than me would have done. Also, i wonder how community differs. The community i lived in longest as a child was predominantly black, and the n word was used a lot, as i suppose a tongue in cheek way...a greeting etc. i wpspent a lot of time ipimmersed in a particular family, where i had my hair braided along with the other kids. I am not sure anout the word colour blind, but it just doesnot make a difference to me...

lostinrates

silvercar wrote: »

Loving this sentiment. A friend told me that she used to have photos of all her family on display, then when the in-laws came to visit she would do a quick swap around and put their photos up.

I seriously could not be bothered with that, and doubt either side would notice or care in our family! We did put a picture of dh's mother away in the past as his sister could not come to teems with loss and found pictures upset her.

silvercar

Years ago I used a child minder who was inspected and told her toys were not multi cultural and she should go out and buy some black dolls.

If you had black friends over to dinner - would you be happy to have them on display ?

Isn't this the parrot test taken a step further?

Parrot test: If you were at a club and/ or drunk (or some other flirty situation) would you be happy with your behaviour if your other half was a parrot sitting on your should and witnessing everything you said and every action?

lostinrates

lostinrates wrote: »

. I am not sure anout the word colour blind, but it just doesnot make a difference to me...

infact, this is slightly disingenuous on further thought. There is no doubt in my mind, i am NOT colour blind. I presume its because of the most normal colour of people i loved as a child, but i find black men attractive in the way some gentlemen prefer blondes i guess.

PasturesNew

... dogs that jump up and ruin your outfit....

That's probably my biggest issue with dogs.... just went out in the garden, it's pouring.... they've a dog. It yapped... then it came to me and leapt up 3x, putting its paws on my jeans.... now I've no jeans as they've got footprints ... and I've no washing machine.

michaels

DW and I were a bit on and off when we were first together and one time we visted my parents house and my mother had put up a photo of me and another young lady who I had brought with me the previous time I had visted my parents house in the bedroom DW and I were sleeping in :eek:. It obviosuly didn't acheive the objective my mother had in mind but DW has still not forgiven me, despit eme not quite understanding how it is my fault...

silvercar wrote: »

Loving this sentiment. A friend told me that she used to have photos of all her family on display, then when the in-laws came to visit she would do a quick swap around and put their photos up.

lostinrates

michaels wrote: »

DW and I were a bit on and off when we were first together and one time we visted my parents house and my mother had put up a photo of me and another young lady who I had brought with me the previous time I had visted my parents house in the bedroom DW and I were sleeping in :eek:. It obviosuly didn't acheive the objective my mother had in mind but DW has still not forgiven me, despit eme not quite understanding how it is my fault...

Not forgiven you or teases you about it? I tease dh all the time about women i know he knew. He is far too lovely to do the same to me.

LydiaJ

michaels wrote: »

DW and I were a bit on and off when we were first together and one time we visted my parents house and my mother had put up a photo of me and another young lady who I had brought with me the previous time I had visted my parents house in the bedroom DW and I were sleeping in :eek:. It obviosuly didn't acheive the objective my mother had in mind but DW has still not forgiven me, despit eme not quite understanding how it is my fault...

Perhaps she feels you should not have tolerated that from your mum, and should have moved the photo elsewhere as soon as you saw it.

It is STILL raining here. My dad is due to arrive this evening for the weekend. I get to play at being almost like a 2 parent family as the kids have a great relationship with him and he is a very accepting and helpful sort of guest who definitely does more work than he causes. Just wish it could be fine tomorrow - he would probably do my gardening while I'm out at work.

silvercar

michaels wrote: »

DW and I were a bit on and off when we were first together and one time we visted my parents house and my mother had put up a photo of me and another young lady who I had brought with me the previous time I had visted my parents house in the bedroom DW and I were sleeping in :eek:. It obviosuly didn't acheive the objective my mother had in mind but DW has still not forgiven me, despit eme not quite understanding how it is my fault...

She should have been impressed that you were allowed to sleep together in your parent's house.

If she had really disapproved one of you would have been directed towards another room.