Teacher is lying

concerned43

I attended a meeting the other month at my DS's school. The head said some pretty shocking things about my DS at the meeting - totally fabricated and nothing to do with school! I was very upset at her accusations.
However, I knew if I were to complain it would need more than just my version as she had others at the meeting who would deny everything. so I requested the minutes of the meeting and the minutes state what the head teacher said to me!
I complained to the Governors and they have just wrote back saying the investigated and the Head did not say those things as she was just repeating as her role as 'chair' what others were saying-this is a downright lie and wish to take it further
Anyone know who else I take this to?

whitewing

How old is your DS? Just wondering if having a chat with Connexions would help. How do you know what was said was not true? (Don't mean you are lying, just we haven't got so much info to go on).

Is your complaint about the Head fibbing, or about what is happening with your DS? Perhaps you need to take separate action for both to get a satisfactory outcome?

meritaten

well for a start the governers have contradicted themselves. The head either did or did not say those words and you have them down in black and white in the minutes. To say the head is merely repeating what 'others' have said is obfuscation.
Your next step is to write to the Local Education Authority outlining your complaint and forwarding copies (not the originals - you need to keep them), of the minutes and the letter from the governers. Tell them you are not satisfied with the reply from the governers and you want the LEA to take action. Now tell them what action you want taken. whether its an apology off the head and a promise that these lies will never be mentioned again or disciplinary action or all these - that is entirely up to you.
Give them a reasonable time limit and promise further 'legal' action if your time limit is not met.
Assuming that what was said about your DD is NOT true and you can prove it - this should bring it to the notice of the LEA at the very least!
good luck and let us know what you do!

concerned43

I know she is lying because I was at the meeting and heard what she said, the minutes reflect that she said it and she is denying it - the subject is regarding my DS's disability and bullying at the school, which my DS is subjected to on a weekly basis.
The disability she claims my DS has is pure fabrication and as she does not know my family and has not spent any time with my DS, then has said these things without any evidence whatsoever. With regards to bullying, she would interview the bully divulging who made the allegation of bullying and what DS said the bully was doing to him. Therefore DS was subject to more bullying.

Nicki

I'm guessing this all relates to the meeting you posted about a few weeks ago where the autism diagnosis was withdrawn unexpectedly?

It all sounds hugely stressful, and I wonder whether your upset with the head is a manifestation of how stressful the whole situation is at the moment with no firm diagnosis in place, and perhaps insufficient support at school as a consequence?

Do you have a parents partnership or similar locally who could support you through the current mess? Or could you get in contact with ACE or IPSEA and get some advice on how to move this forward constructively?

In your current place (have been there and got the t shirt) it is completely natural to be angry at everyone who is letting you down, and to want to pursue it all. But the only important thing really is to get a diagnosis for your child and get him the help he needs, and will pursuing a complaint against the head about this meeting advance this?

I know you've started a few threads about your DS and problems at school. Are there other schools locally which he could attend who might be better at helping students with additional needs? Might you have reached the end of the line with the current school and head anyway?

meritaten

so the facts of the matter is that the head is saying your DD has a disability that she doesn't in fact suffer from, and that the bullying is not being dealt with in a proper manner (in your opinion)?

may I ask what disability your DS is supposedly suffering from? and what is the basis of the heads diagnosis of this? has there been an assessment by a fully qualified practitioner?

many heads will initially deal with bullies by speaking to them - in this case it has caused your DS to be more of a target. Have you informed the head of this?
Do you have a copy of the schools anti-bullying policy? it is supposed to be available to ALL parents and is sometimes posted on the school website. This way you can check what steps the school should be taking to deal with this problem.
Please continue speaking to the school - in fact make a damm nuisance of yourself. phone or go to the school after ever single incident of bullying! if (god forbid) there are physical signs of bullying (bruises, cuts or torn clothing) then take photographs as proof!
keep a note of every incident with the date time etc - and keep a note of EVERY time you contact the school in the same way and always write down who you spoke to - even if was only the secretary.
I hope this bullying is stopped for your DS sake, make your complaint to the LEA and take my advice about the bullying - and keep reminding them of the 'duty of care' they have towards your son.
and if you feel that your son is being overwhelmed or is in real physical danger - do NOT send him to school!
it may be a good idea to take him along to the GP too - and explain the situation to him, he/she can help you at this time.

coolcait

meritaten wrote: »

well for a start the governers have contradicted themselves. The head either did or did not say those words and you have them down in black and white in the minutes. To say the head is merely repeating what 'others' have said is obfuscation.

They haven't necessarily contradicted themselves at all.

It is quite possible that the head, in her role as 'Chair' of the meeting, has put forward concerns which have been raised about the OP's son. In that sense she was 'reporting', or 'summarising' these views.

That's different from her giving her personal view of the OP's son. Or 'saying things' about him.

OP, I think you need to be absolutely clear about this point before you continue on this track of accusing the school of 'lying'. It won't get you anywhere, except into trouble.

It would be better look at how appropriate it was for the head to do this. Was she summarising things which had already been said at the meeting? That's fair - as long as she also simmarised your side of the story - fairly.

Did she bring in things which she 'had been told' by people who weren't at the meeting? If so, that's much more dodgy territiory, IMO - unless you were given advance notice of these concerns, and allowed to respond to them. With expert support if necessary.

Seanymph

do you have a local 'parenting partnership' - they are amazing and a big source of support.

They will back you up I'm sure.

concerned43

coolcait wrote: »

They haven't necessarily contradicted themselves at all.

It is quite possible that the head, in her role as 'Chair' of the meeting, has put forward concerns which have been raised about the OP's son. In that sense she was 'reporting', or 'summarising' these views.

That's different from her giving her personal view of the OP's son. Or 'saying things' about him.

OP, I think you need to be absolutely clear about this point before you continue on this track of accusing the school of 'lying'. It won't get you anywhere, except into trouble.

It would be better look at how appropriate it was for the head to do this. Was she summarising things which had already been said at the meeting? That's fair - as long as she also simmarised your side of the story - fairly.

Did she bring in things which she 'had been told' by people who weren't at the meeting? If so, that's much more dodgy territiory, IMO - unless you were given advance notice of these concerns, and allowed to respond to them. With expert support if necessary.

I have ran many companies and I know the role of chairman at any given meeting. This was not a summary - this was her personal opinion based on knowing absolutely nothing about our situation.

concerned43

Nicki wrote: »

I'm guessing this all relates to the meeting you posted about a few weeks ago where the autism diagnosis was withdrawn unexpectedly?

It all sounds hugely stressful, and I wonder whether your upset with the head is a manifestation of how stressful the whole situation is at the moment with no firm diagnosis in place, and perhaps insufficient support at school as a consequence?

Do you have a parents partnership or similar locally who could support you through the current mess? Or could you get in contact with ACE or IPSEA and get some advice on how to move this forward constructively?

In your current place (have been there and got the t shirt) it is completely natural to be angry at everyone who is letting you down, and to want to pursue it all. But the only important thing really is to get a diagnosis for your child and get him the help he needs, and will pursuing a complaint against the head about this meeting advance this?

I know you've started a few threads about your DS and problems at school. Are there other schools locally which he could attend who might be better at helping students with additional needs? Might you have reached the end of the line with the current school and head anyway?

The problem Nicki - is that I do not want my DS diagnosed!! All I want is for his anxiety disorder to be treated! and I do not believe his treatment for that condition would change because of a formal diagnosis.
With regards to CAMHS - i have had a reply from the NHS about my official complaint and am now proceeding with a legal claim against them.

concerned43

meritaten wrote: »

so the facts of the matter is that the head is saying your DD has a disability that she doesn't in fact suffer from, and that the bullying is not being dealt with in a proper manner (in your opinion)?

may I ask what disability your DS is supposedly suffering from? and what is the basis of the heads diagnosis of this? has there been an assessment by a fully qualified practitioner?

many heads will initially deal with bullies by speaking to them - in this case it has caused your DS to be more of a target. Have you informed the head of this?
Do you have a copy of the schools anti-bullying policy? it is supposed to be available to ALL parents and is sometimes posted on the school website. This way you can check what steps the school should be taking to deal with this problem.
Please continue speaking to the school - in fact make a damm nuisance of yourself. phone or go to the school after ever single incident of bullying! if (god forbid) there are physical signs of bullying (bruises, cuts or torn clothing) then take photographs as proof!
keep a note of every incident with the date time etc - and keep a note of EVERY time you contact the school in the same way and always write down who you spoke to - even if was only the secretary.
I hope this bullying is stopped for your DS sake, make your complaint to the LEA and take my advice about the bullying - and keep reminding them of the 'duty of care' they have towards your son.
and if you feel that your son is being overwhelmed or is in real physical danger - do NOT send him to school!
it may be a good idea to take him along to the GP too - and explain the situation to him, he/she can help you at this time.

Its not just the kids but the teachers too!