Controlling Ex... Chapter 2

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

Well, even if he did, he'd soon have to find a way of getting him to and from school, wouldn't he?

As of course, you won't be there at 3.30pm to provide childcare until he turns up or at 7am to 'accept delivery' of DS in order to take him to school. So he would have to arrange (and pay for) suitable childcare himself.





He's trying to grind you down - mindless posturing, needing attention hence the messages - sounds like he's sitting on the sofa feeling neglected, so is spending hours trying to construct these elaborate 148 character long messages, to me.


Just chill out a bit. He's being a !!!!!!!! and for all the brave and courageous (and pompous) statements he's making now, they'll not do him any favours in court.

Keep the text messages. Especially as they are saying he is only interested in access to punish you for being entitled to maintenance.

Emmzi

at the monet you get £100 a month. That should be nearer £220. Less 2 nights = 5/7 * 220 = £157 so still up a bit.

Plus he's just being a prat so ignore it.

masonsmum

Well folks wee update on the controlling ex,

Received a text today and it said
"thats the forms filled and ready to post and the wheels in motion with my lawyer, you can still end this but once these forms leave there will be no turning back. Does DS readlly need this unrest due to you thinking you are teaching me a lesson, he has a good life with me and wants for nothing, up to you, do what is right for the wee man or teach me a lesson?? Doesnt have to be like this but you hold the cards"

So my reply was good stuff hopefully I will hear from my lawyer soon

To which I got
"Can you afford this legal expense? Maybe you could get DS to pay for it as you take everything else off him, I have tried to make you see sense and do what is right for DS, well its the hard route now and the only loser is DS"

Totally cr*pping himself because of losing more precious money, he honestly believes I would just say oh just keep giving me a measly £100 a month anything for an easy life.

Need to remain tough!!

RAS

You have made sure you lawyer has copies of all these texts?

They really are going to make him look wonderful in court:D.

masonsmum

I have saved all these texts on my phone, however my lawyers seem so "laid back" regarding all this! I presume if it does "go to court" she will take more heed then but she seems to think its all false threats at the moment and try not to get too wound up.

Im just overly concerned that I will lose on this, my time is precious with my family and I am just so worried that he will get the access that he wants (solely to punish me for taking him to the CSA) will the courts take these text messages into consideration and the fact that he will not accept any terms with set days and times?

rpc

masonsmum wrote: »

my lawyers seem so "laid back" regarding all this!

Find a new one

Im just overly concerned that I will lose on this, my time is precious with my family and I am just so worried that he will get the access that he wants (solely to punish me for taking him to the CSA) will the courts take these text messages into consideration and the fact that he will not accept any terms with set days and times?

Set days and times are exactly what a court will give. No judge is going to say "let him see DS whenever he wants" or "10 nights a month". It will be strictly Xpm on X day until Yam on Y day and Zam to Zpm on Z day.

masonsmum

Can I get a new lawyer halfway through a process?

sassyblue

Course you can!! See if someone can recommend another one, a good lawyer can be as effective as the police to keep a control freak under control.

Emmzi

I suspect your lawyer has seen this a thousand times and can spot !!!!!!!! a mile off so would of course be more relaxed than you. The last thing your family needs is you getting wound up! I'd stick with mellow.

You will get set times for access, which will be great for you - no more messing about knowing what days, although the reality is that you may have DS a bit more often as you know ex will let you down. So be it.

I can't see how you will end up with any *less* money!

masonsmum

Thanks for all your help and advice, really find this board a lifesaver when it comes to things like this.

Decided today to drop an email to Strathclyde Police today just to see what was classed as harassment and I have got officers coming to visit tomorrow night...... aargh!
Just seems quite scary but if I am adamant I am going to move on with my life I must be stronger!