Need a nan pushchair

Chakani

My dad has always been very rude about my pushchair, and compared it very unfavourably with what he remembers from when we were small. For what it's worth, I remember too (I'm the eldest) - and the one they had wasn't all that special!

My parents visit once every few months, and don't want to do anything alone with the children anyway, so I'm afraid I ignore his moaning. If they felt strongly enough though to want to buy a new pushchair, then I would trust them to choose and buy one - after all, I trust their judgement enough to let them look after my babies and keep them safe. If you can't trust your mother or MIL to buy a safe pushchair, does that tell you that you shouldn't be trusting them with your child, or does it tell you that maybe they deserve more trust than you are giving them. Either might apply, but we are all capable of being a bit over the top with our new babies, and it is easy to be hurtful to people without meaning to if your focus is only on your baby.

On the other hand, pushchairs aren't THAT complicated, and you only have to learn how to use one, so as a grandparent, if the parent is being silly and precious about it, is it really worth the argument?

anguk

Nicki wrote: »

Wow, this thread has slipped into profound nastiness pretty quickly.

Whilst it makes no odds to a baby whether it is being pushed around in a £20 pram or a £500 one, I take issue to the suggestion that a parent should not be entitled to know if granny is using a second hand pushchair rather than the one they have chosen. If you google pushchair recalls you will see that a lot of UK pushchairs in their time have been subject to safety recalls for situations such as children having fingers cut off in the mechanisms, being strangled on straps, etc. These range from high end makes like Phil and Teds to cheap ones from Argos.

As a parent, if granny bought a second hand pushchair and put my child in it, I am afraid I would want to see it to check it was clean and safe (eg straps not frayed, seat back secure, brakes working, mechanism operating smoothly) and also to make sure it wasn't one which had been the subject of a recall. And I would not consider that to be an unreasonable request. Assuming the pushchair was OK, then granny could use it at will, whether it had blue and white value stripes or not. (though if granny is kind enough to have my baby one day a week, perhaps I should go with her to help choose the stroller and pay for it myself )

But for some people it's not about 2nd hand, they just wouldn't want their baby in a cheap brand new buggy. I do think for some parents it is all about the name and status.

I do agree with your advice about 2nd hand buggies, they do need to be thoroughly checked over to make sure they're safe.

missprice

Nicki wrote: »

I take issue to the suggestion that a parent should not be entitled to know if granny is using a second hand pushchair rather than the one they have chosen. If you google pushchair recalls you will see that a lot of UK pushchairs in their time have been subject to safety recall

I understand that and its a fair point

As a parent, if granny bought a second hand pushchair and put my child in it, I am afraid I would want to see it to check it was clean and safe (eg straps not frayed, seat back secure, brakes working, mechanism operating smoothly) and also to make sure it wasn't one which had been the subject of a recall. And I would not consider that to be an unreasonable request.
ok but granny brought you up without mishap as you are here to prove do you think she would not check such things herself, but again fair do's I understand that too
Assuming the pushchair was OK, then granny could use it at will, whether it had blue and white value stripes or not. (though if granny is kind enough to have my baby one day a week, perhaps I should go with her to help choose the stroller and pay for it myself )

I think what got to me about a post above is that the baby had a bugaboo and regardless of how difficult it may be to operate (never had a problem myself except on brand new ones)
that mother and MIL would be sacked from childcare duties, simply because the bugaboo was too difficult
some of these 'travel systems' weigh a bloody ton and are a pain to get in a car boot.
why not spend £30 on a NEW buggy thats much easier to handle and fold up.
and who asked mum and MIL what they wanted when baby came along and they were going to be childcare providers? they dont have to provide the childcare so why not make it easier if they do.
not like the baby will be in a buggy all day is it?

Nicki

My mum wouldn't know how to check if a pram had been recalled and is not very Internet savvy. And when I was a child I don't think there was a distinction between pushchairs suitable from
6 months and above and more general ones from birth. So personally if I were in this situation my mum would need some support to buy something suitable without this meaning she wasn't otherwise fit to have her grandchild without supervision

xxlouisexx56

Both my own mother and mil work so do not have either of my girls on a regular basis.

When they do have them, they are more than happy to use the pram we already own.

In regards to sacking them off child are responsibilities, I would do that if they did anything with my children that I was not consulted about and didn't like

Katie1980_2

Techno XT I have one and it is amazing!! I can fold it one handed and holding a lil one so I love it. Ebay and Maclaren's customer service is brilliant they repaired mine for me for the princely sum of £15 to repair the hood

acl2009

fluffnutter wrote: »

Jeez! Another one! What's the world coming to? No wonder kids grow up with such unrealistic senses of entitlement when they've got precious, snobby parents like this.

This thread is truly shocking.

It's called wanting the best for your baby. Yes this is for my "PFB" however find me a first time parent that does not want he best for their baby? If you have the money to buy them nice things why shouldn't you? I don't think it's fair to judge someone for wanting the best for their child.

You don't know what's unseen damage there is is to a second hand pram just like you wouldn't buy a second hand car seat as you don't know what accident it could of been in.

I can understand that some people may not get on with a particular type of buggy/pram however i would fully expect anyone that was looking after my child to run it by me before putting them in an alternative. And for the record I have no expectation for anyone to provide child are, I will be the person raising my child, not my parents/family.

I am truly sorry if this is offensive but I find it offensive to be called "precious and snobby"

fluffnutter

Nicki wrote: »

My mum wouldn't know how to check if a pram had been recalled and is not very Internet savvy. And when I was a child I don't think there was a distinction between pushchairs suitable from
6 months and above and more general ones from birth. So personally if I were in this situation my mum would need some support to buy something suitable without this meaning she wasn't otherwise fit to have her grandchild without supervision

TBH, I'd expect to be involved too. I doubt my mum would just go and buy a buggy without asking my opinions first, particularly as it was something that we'd both probably end up using.

Like missprice I too recoiled at the 'I'd find another childcare provider' comment that one poster posted about her mother and MIL. To suggest that's all grandparents are and to then remove this 'job' from them just because of a conflict of opinions over pushchairs struck me as quite a hurtful way to view one's own mother and husband's mother.

fluffnutter

xxlouisexx56 wrote: »

Both my own mother and mil work so do not have either of my girls on a regular basis.

When they do have them, they are more than happy to use the pram we already own.

In regards to sacking them off child are responsibilities, I would do that if they did anything with my children that I was not consulted about and didn't like

I hope you've given them a list then because God forbid they do something you don't like and discover their punishment is that they're not allowed to care for their grandchildren any more.

Grandparent/grandchildren relationships are precious and should be encouraged and supported. Life's about compromise and a bit of give and take, not imposing your views on everybody else and threatening them if they don't kowtow.

Don't you think they've got any wisdom? They managed to bring you up, after all. Or do you really believe you've got nothing to learn about anything from anybody?

fluffnutter

acl2009 wrote: »

It's called wanting the best for your baby. Yes this is for my "PFB" however find me a first time parent that does not want he best for their baby? If you have the money to buy them nice things why shouldn't you? I don't think it's fair to judge someone for wanting the best for their child.

You don't know what's unseen damage there is is to a second hand pram just like you wouldn't buy a second hand car seat as you don't know what accident it could of been in.

I can understand that some people may not get on with a particular type of buggy/pram however i would fully expect anyone that was looking after my child to run it by me before putting them in an alternative. And for the record I have no expectation for anyone to provide child are, I will be the person raising my child, not my parents/family.

I am truly sorry if this is offensive but I find it offensive to be called "precious and snobby"

Of course you want the best for your baby. I should imagine your parents want the best for their grandchild too.