Help how to deal with a difficult teacher

jellyhead

Awww that's so sweet

Mine is in year 2 so I am trying to get him trained so he can manage swimming with school next year (he is very clumsy, forgetful and disorganised, and comes out at least ten minutes late on days they've had PE last lesson).

He'll probably just lose his pants and come home without them

Mojisola

the_pink_panther wrote: »

For the record, no teacher will hold issues with parents against the child. If anything the teacher will just feel sorry for the child.

This is a bit naive! Teachers come from the same human species as the rest of us and there are good and bad ones.

One local school had a Headteacher who scored well in inspections and was highly thought of by the LEA advisors. What they didn't know was that he was a bully. As an example, a friend went up to the school to talk about something she wasn't happy about. When her child came home, he said "You've been to the school, haven't you? I know because as Mr X passed me in the corridor, he punched me in the arm."

The Head was secretly a very nasty piece of work and most parents who had problems with school either shut up or moved their child to another school rather than risk subjecting their children to his retaliations.

daisiegg

JC9297 wrote: »

None of the teachers I know would ever take any negative feelings towards a parent out on a child, in fact a lot of the time teachers feel sorry for children when they have met the parents.

This is completely true. I had to ring a parent this morning who was incredibly rude and difficult. I taught his daughter next lesson and if anything it made me feel more sympathetic and kind towards her because of what she must have to put up with at home!

daisiegg

Person_one wrote: »

The teacher's comment that she hopes her relationship with the child won't be affected is very concerning though. Of course it shouldn't be affected, what was her reasoning for that vaguely threatening remark?

I don't see this as threatening. It's the sort of thing I might say to a parent intending to be comforting! It could also be that the teacher is worried that the parent will now 'bad mouth' her to the child, thus affecting their previously good relationship.

irrationalactor

I am completely shocked that the question of whether or not to shower after being in a pool even comes up. Surely it's just basic hygiene?

When I was a kid it was drummed into us that you were to shower both BEFORE and AFTER being in the pool. It's only common sense that you don't want to track dirt into a pool that you're sharing with unknown numbers of people, and that you want to get rid of any dirt that may have inadvertently ended up in the pool by showering afterwards (not to mention the chlorine!).

The idea of getting out of a chlorinated pool and drying off with a towel without first showering is pretty disgusting in my opinion.

And as for goggles being a health and safety risk - what? Adult swimmers wear goggles all the time - opening your eyes underwater can be quite unpleasant, especially in a chlorinated pool.

I would be horrified if any child I knew (sensitive skin or not!) was skipping a shower after swimming - it seems dreadfully unhygienic.

Sorry that this teacher seems to have categorised you as a 'nuisance' - obviously your innocent note on the permission slip has been taken the wrong way. I think this is the root of the problem. Perhaps it might be worth apologising for the first incident since obviously the teacher has taken offence where you didn't intend it?

Acc72

irrationalactor wrote: »

I am completely shocked that the question of whether or not to shower after being in a pool even comes up.

The idea of getting out of a chlorinated pool and drying off with a towel without first showering is pretty disgusting in my opinion.

I would be horrified if any child I knew (sensitive skin or not!) was skipping a shower after swimming - it seems dreadfully unhygienic.

You would be shocked, disgusted and horrified ?

When I was at school we did not shower either before or after swimming and as far as I know nobody suffered because of this.

In the case of the OP, as the issue seems to be mostly with her daughters eyes maybe she should just wash her face in clean water after swimming lessons ?

Maybe it is just that I haven't kept up with the times ? .....

Scorpio33

The crux of the issue here seems to be confusion over the policy. Teachers follow policy. If the policy states that no shower is needed after swimming, then there should be no reason why you should feel a need to complain. The shower is there to use for prearranged showering (such as for medical conditions), but that is by request only - not the norm. If however the policy states that all pupils should wash their face afterwards, then the teacher is not following policy - and this needs to be addressed.

I think that this has been handled badly from both the teachers perspective and from the OP's perspective. The teacher has reacted badly to a perfectly reasonable request. Similarly, the OP may have come accross as agressive and patronising, wanting to tell the teacher how to do her job.

I would try and arrange a meeting with the head, the teacher and the OP. Then clarify the policy, apologise for any miscommunication or unitentional aggrivation caused (even if the OP feels that they are in the right) and hope that this can be put in the past. Similarly hope that the teacher can apologise for any bad feelings caused. The key is moving forward with a happier relationship with the teacher.

The teachers are there to teach, let them do their job.

irrationalactor

Acc72 wrote: »

You would be shocked, disgusted and horrified ?

When I was at school we did not shower either before or after swimming and as far as I know nobody suffered because of this.

So it's fine for someone to enter a public pool without showering first?

Then the next person comes along and is exposed to whatever dirt this person neglected to wash off? And the OP's DD doesn't even get a chance to clean herself afterwards!

I might be coming across a bit OCD (I'm really really not) but I've heard public swimming pools described as 'taking a bath with the whole town' before. There is some truth in this! It's only polite to keep the public baths as clean as possible.

I honestly thought that showering before and after using a swimming pool was a really basic rule - like washing your hands after using the facilities.

rpc

irrationalactor wrote: »

Then the next person comes along and is exposed to whatever dirt this person neglected to wash off? And the OP's DD doesn't even get a chance to clean herself afterwards!

It isn't just dirt - most of what ends up in the water is sweat and grease that has accumulated on your skin. Most of that will gather in the top 1-2 feet of water (when we do water testing, you take your sample from a fair depth because the top is expected to be manky).

The chlorine just kills bugs, it doesn't keep the water clean. The filters keep the water clean, but a typical swimming pool will take 24-48 hours to do a complete water change.

bromleymum

I'm afraid I think this is a mountain out of a molehill issue.

Your DD will be allowed to shower after the lessons. The school has given you what you want. What the other children do is between their parents and the school.

Personally after taking one look at the showering facilities at most swimming pools I think there's nothing to be gained hygiene wise, from showering after a lesson. Let the chlorine carry on working I say.

I've always preferred to take my children straight home for a bath/shower. I do make them rinse off prior to getting in the pool though out of respect for other users. I've never given much thought to the school swimming lessons.

I only had a bath on a Sunday night as a kid so god knows how I survived childhood. Germs are everywhere!!!