My life is a mess!!!

jules68

Where do I start? Well to cut a long story short my husband has walked out( a month ago now)has cancelled everything.I am slowly sorting things out,phoned mortgage company and had a 3 month payment break on mortgage as hardly any income at mo til I sort things out.things going through solicitors etc
My main worry of all is what is the liklyhood of me being able to stay in the house/I have 2 kids 10 and 3, if i change to an interest only mortgage ,If i am allowed to stay,I can prob afford things.I cannot get a mortgage in my name only as i only earn a small wage
My solicitor says dont worry but i am racked with worry that i will be forced to sell
Can anyone offer any advice please?

Seaxwyn

Hi jules

You poor thing, it must be so stressful. I'm sure you'll get lots of good help on here. All I can offer is that I switched our mortgage to interest only with no trouble at all - just rang up and requested it. They charged a £75 'admin fee' but that was it. The mortgage is with Abbey.

I should hope that any lender would want to avoid being responsible for making two young children homeless - you can stress that you just need some time to get on your feet.

Good luck!

TangledMemories_2

Hi hun

I'm so sorry to hear/read what's happened to you. **huge hugs**
You WILL get through this. You've done the right thing by informing your mortgage company what's happened. Your solicitor or local council may be able to help you with advice as to anything you're entitled to.

Have you looked into the possibility of child tax credits, working family tax credits? I know they do stuff for people on low income with children.

Sorry I'm not much use on this

A

GirlRacer_2

Hi Jules, sorry to hear about your husband leaving. You say your only earning a small wage, are you able to increase your hours? have you contacted tax credits to make sure your getting everything that your entitled to? Has you husband agrred to give you some money towards the upkeep of the children? Have you contacted Council Tax to ensure you get a reduced bill in April?

I've been in the same boat as you, my husband done the same to me about 4 years ago, didn't think I'd get through it at the time, but there is now some light at the end of the tunnel.

Hopefully someone else will be along soon and they'll be able to give you lots of advice. Try not to worry.

jules68

Thanks for super quick reply, the mortgage company C&G have said i can change to interest only with an admin fee but it is a joint mortgage and my ex is insisting i sell it, my solicitor says no but I just dont know if i will "win" the house so to speak as my ex name will have to stay on the mortgage.

jules68

My ex is just paying maint for yhe 3 yr old, the other is my first husband(yes twice the men in my life have gone off with someone else!) I have just got through the tax credits I cant increase hrs as the more I work ,the more childcare etc and have no family for support.have phoned about council tax

I'mcomingbackasaman

jules68 wrote:

Thanks for super quick reply, the mortgage company C&G have said i can change to interest only with an admin fee but it is a joint mortgage and my ex is insisting i sell it, my solicitor says no but I just dont know if i will "win" the house so to speak as my ex name will have to stay on the mortgage.

Hi Jules68 don't panic. Your husband won't be able to sell the house if it's in joint names as you say. If your going through legal separation or divorce the house will be decided upon as well as child maintenance. The Solicitor can put a Class F charge on the house until proceedings start so that your husband is powerless to sell the house.

Normally when there's children involved you are allowed to keep the house until the children reach a certain age (think it's 18 but don't quote me.)
Then the matrimonial home is sold and each party receives a share if that's what the judge has decided. Depends on different circumstances.

angelavdavis

Hi Jules, welcome to MSE!

I am a divorcee but childless, so can't offer the legal advice, but otherwise, my advice is:

1) Check out your benefits allowance on www.entitledto.co.uk.

2) As advised, the courts won't rule you homeless with kiddies just like that.

3) Post up your Statement of affairs online so the good folk on here can help you manage your short-term living expenses to help you ride through the issues. Advice can be gained here: http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.html?t=107280

4) Short term also, check out the OldStyle board because they will offer advice on reducing household costs, etc.

Good luck, friendly advice is always available here, so don't be worried about asking - everyone here is ready to help.

jules68

thanks everything is such a mess and am just completely drained of energy, thought as I was on legal aid i was getting it for free, how wrong could i have been.The solicitor says that whatever the outcome the charges will come out of the profit of the hse,if sold or a charge put on the propertyif not.I just cant bear the thought of having to tell the kids we have to sell the hoyse.I know I should not panic but I worry about everything.A month ago I was working my socks off to pay all our debts to have a happier life with,as I thought, my loving caring husband.Now I am faced with whatever crap he can throw at me saying its all my fault and that he never loved me etc

GirlRacer_2

Men are really good at that sort of thing. He's feeling guilty so he shifts the blame onto you. My ex blamed me that he had met this woman 20 years older than him and started an affair. He was working the other side of the country to me and living with her in the week and me at the weekend...... GREAT!

Don't let him treat you like this. Hold your head up with dignity it's his loss. Fight him all the way girl!

abbecer

Can't offer a ny advice other than what has been said. Just want to give you a big virtual snuggly hug.

Rebecca x